


The Gilmore Guy and Mariano Girl

by DottieSnark



Category: Gilmore Girls
Genre: Additional Warnings In Author's Note, Depression, Ensemble Cast, F/M, Family, Gen, Hurt/Comfort, Jess is a Gilmore, Love Triangles, Mental Health Issues, Mysterious backstory, Personalities intact, References and jokes galore!, Roleswap, Rory is a Danes, Season/Series 01, Slow Burn, Social Anxiety, Teen Angst, The ups and downs of parenting, True to the tone of Gilmore Girls, alternative universe, maternal!Lorelai
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-01-20
Updated: 2019-07-06
Packaged: 2019-10-13 01:40:38
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 7
Words: 49,109
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17478833
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DottieSnark/pseuds/DottieSnark
Summary: Lorelai Gilmore always expected a lot from her son Jess; that’s why he’s on the path to Harvard, after all. But when Jess’s behavior spirals out of control she begins to wonder if her dreams for Jess are what he wants too. Meanwhile, Rory Mariano, a runaway, has come to Stars Hollow, reminding Lorelai of herself at that age. Will she be able to help this girl too? Roleswap AU.





	1. Co-Pilot

**Author's Note:**

> This is a Roleswap AU. For more details about how this AU works please see the end note. All you need to know to enjoy this story, though, is that Jess is now the son of Lorelai Gilmore and Rory is the daughter of Liz Danes.

Jess walked down the sidewalk of Main Street as the bitter cold nipped at his face. It was one of those early cold-fronts that happened sometimes in New England's September. Weather here was typically temperamental. The street was lined with many stores, such as restaurants, bookstores and multiple shops that specialized in porcelain unicorns. To Jess's left was the town square. A couple dressed in puffy coats and knitted hats were sitting on the gazebo sipping hot chocolate out of to-go cups from Luke's Diner.

Instead of focusing on his path Jess's gaze was enthralled by his worn down copy of  _The Old Man and the Sea,_  one of his old favorites. Its margins were already chock full of Jess's annotations, but he was scribbling away more notes nonetheless.

When he reached the street corner between Doose's Market and the flower shop Jess didn't bother to look both ways for cars. He just stepped off the curb and trusted that the drivers weren't speeding past fifteen miles per hour. He didn't look out for other pedestrians either. Everyone in Stars Hollow knew Jess, and they knew if he was walking their way with a book in his hands then it was  _their_  job to jump out of his way.

As Jess crossed the street a car stopped short just a foot or two shy from hitting him. Jess didn't even notice, he just kept walking.

A block later he reached Luke's Diner. A patron exited the diner and held the door for Jess, who still wasn't paying any attention to his surroundings. Jess stood in the doorway for a few moments while he finished his paragraph then looked up to find where the woman he was meeting was sitting. Once he sat down at her table he went back to reading his book. It only took a few seconds, though, for her to snatch it out of his hands.

Jess looked up, his eyes at first were wide with surprise before turning into an angry glare. Sitting across from him his mother, Lorelai Gilmore, was grinning devilishly.

"You'll thank me," she said. "One of these days you'll trip."

"I'm already sitting. How can I trip?"

"It's preemptive."

"Let me finish the chapter," Jess begged. His begging needed work. It came out more like a demand, which he knew never worked on his mother.

Lorelai ignored him and rested the book on her lap. She picked up her coffee cup and took a long sip, complete with slurping sounds. When she put her mug back on the table her eyes caught the empty mug in front of Jess. She picked it up. "Want?"

"Yes ma'am!" Jess said with forced pep.

Lorelai stood and left the book on her chair, just out of Jess's reach. As soon as she was distracted by the diner proprietor, Luke, Jess reached over the table and grabbed his book back. He vaguely overheard bits and pieces of an argument between Lorelai and Luke, it involved Luke accusing Lorelai of being a junkie, before she returned with Jess's cup.

Lorelai gasped dramatically and held a pointed finger at her son while standing over him. "You tricked me!" she said.

Jess smirked without taking his eyes off the book. He'd never admit it to her but his mother's flair for dramatics always amused him. Still, he'd rather be reading then being sucked into her nonsense. He tried to block Lorelai out and focus on Hemingway's concise words.

Lorelai sat back down beside him and put the coffee cup in front of Jess. Jess ignored it.

"Did you even want your coffee?" Lorelai asked.

Jess shrugged. No, he didn't. Coffee was his mother's obsession, not his.

"So it really was just all a trick?"

Jess peered up at his mother. There was a look a betrayal on her face. Jess had to suppress his laughter. He hid his face with the book, but his trembling shoulders gave him away.

"Heresy!" Lorelai said. She knew she had won over his attention and she was going to pump it for all it was worth. "We do not take coffee in vain. It is our life force. Our savior. Our holy ghost."

Jess pushed the coffee toward his mother. "Need another?"

She picked it up and took a large gulp. "Thank you. I was really running low today. I'm better." Her dramatics were over. At least for now.

"How much have you had today?" Jess asked.

"Now don't you go accusing me of being a junkie too!" Lorelai wagged her finger at Jess.

"What?"

Lorelai pouted. The dramatics were back. It was Jess's fault. He knew what happens when he engaged with his mother's outlandish ideas. "Luke called me a junkie when I told him I already had five cups today."

Jess snickered and tried to hide his face with the book again. "You are," he said under his breath.

"Hey!" she clearly heard it. She slapped his arm playfully. "Be nice to me. I am your mother. I gave you life. And since coffee gives me life, by the transitive property it gives you life too. So be nice to coffee!"

Jess closed his book. She won. He wasn't getting any more reading done and as much as he hated to admit it he was actually enjoying the banter a little. "I'm sorry coffee," Jess said, pretending to speak to Lorelai's coffee cups. "I'm sorry I gave you up and let a crazy-lady take you."

Lorelai stuck her tongue out at him.

Luke walked by the table with an ordering pad. He saw that there were now two coffee cups in front of Lorelai. "I thought you said the coffee was for Jess."

The mother and son shared a look and started laughing.

* * *

Lorelai was working at the Independence Inn when she received the letter that changed everything.

It was a simple enough letter. The envelope was standard size and white. The address on the front was typed instead of handwritten. The stamp was of the Liberty Bell, so much unlike the kinds of stamps Lorelai typically used to mail letters: Spice Girl collectible stamps.

The name on the return address caught her eye: Chilton Preparatory. It was the private school she had applied Jess to a few weeks ago. Unfortunately by the time they applied Chilton was full. Jess was put on a waiting list, though due to his grades and test scores they were considering bumping him to the top of the list. Still, there was a chance that an opening would never come. Lorelai had all but given up hope on her son's chances for private school.

With a pounding heart Lorelai haphazardly tore open the envelope, ripping it down its sides. The letter inside was still in pristine shape. She yanked it out and unwrapped it from its one-third fold.

_Dear Ms. Gilmore, the letter said. We are happy to inform you-_

Lorelai squealed and jumped up and down. She didn't need to read anymore. It was obvious what the letter said. Jess was in.

The patrons of the inn turned to look at her. Lorelai had to remind herself she was a manager. That was not how a manager in hospitality acted. She smiled, waved, then laughed.

"Hi, how ya doing? Enjoying your stay?" She tried to play off her behavior as no big deal.

Slowly the patrons went on their way, and Lorelai went back to reading the letter.

_We are happy to inform you that we have a vacancy at Chilton Preparatory starting immediately. Due to your son's excellent credentials and your enthusiastic pursuit of his enrollment we would be happy to accept him as soon as the first semester's tuition has been received._

Jess did it. He got into Chilton.

"Michel." She turned to her snooty French concierge.

"Whatever it is, non," he said in his thick accent.

"But you don't even know what I'm going to say." Lorelai pouted but Michel wouldn't look in her direction, not that it would have had any effect on his stone-cold heart.

"You're going to make me deal with people and I already told you: people are too stupid for me today."

"Says the guy who works in hospitality. People are your job. Who's the real dummy now?" Lorelai picked up her purse from under the desk. "You're in charge for the next few hours." She hurried away before Michel could argue anymore.

Good news always deserved gifts, and gifts were a great excuse for shopping. At least that's what Lorelai told herself when she found herself in a department store in the middle of the day. Back when she still thought Chilton was a long shot she started searching for Chilton approved clothing to match their uniform policy, and was picking them up now. She would still need to order a blazer with the school's crest directly from the school store, but at least she would be able to give something to Jess when she delivered the good news.

Once everything was bought Lorelai sent a page to Jess, telling him to meet her at the inn after school, and went back to the inn. She couldn't contain her excitement any longer. Even if Jess was going to show up in just minutes, she knew she wouldn't be able to wait that long. She needed to tell someone now. She needed to tell her best friend. Lorelai found herself running through the lobby like a child running off to play a game.

She entered the kitchen just in time to watch Sookie wallop one of her assistants with her skillet. Lorelai checked him out but he seemed to be fine. It was an occupational hazard of working with the adorably klutzy chef Sookie St. James.

"Sookie! It's here! It happened! He did it!" Lorelai said, more like babbled.

Sookie asked Lorelai to calm down and speak in complete sentences.

"The Chilton school! Jess got in!"

Sookie and Lorelai squealed and hugged each other.

"I was so worried," Lorelai said. "I thought it was such a long shot. I knew he had the grades to get in. And he definitely has the smarts. He absolutely nailed their intake tests. But he's been in so much trouble lately and I was scared that was going to ruin his chances."

The trouble she was referring to was a suspension at the end of last year's school term. There were some other things, like fighting and disobedience too. In fact, all the trouble he'd been causing lately was the reason she wanted him going to private school.

"I know he's only getting into trouble and pulling pranks because he's bored and unchallenged. But convincing the school of that? Oh boy!"

"They must've seen his potential." Sookie waved jazz hands in the air.

"And he has so much. This is going to get him back on the Harvard path."

Lorelai couldn't remember a time when the plan wasn't for Jess to go to Harvard. He had always wanted it, ever since he was a child and she bought him his first crimson Harvard sweatshirt. He was so small at the time that it fit him like a dress. Jess had lost focus on the dream in the past few years, though. A prestigious prep school would get him back on track.

"He can get the education that I never got and do the things I never got to do and then I can resent him until he buys me a nice condo to retire to in Florida."

Sookie giggled and clapped her hands. "Hmm, sounds nice."

"Mom?" Jess entering the kitchen through the back doors.

Lorelai and Sookie shared a look and turned to greet him. Their giggles settled into wide smiles.

"You're happy," Jess said.

"Yeah." Lorelai continued to smile.

"Ah, jeez, whatever, or whoever, you did I don't want to hear about it." He placed his hands over his ears.

"Jess!" Lorelai said, half mortified that he would think that and half amused by his mortification. She tapped his shoulder and handed him the bag. "Here."

Jess pulled out a navy blue sweater vest and his forehead wrinkle. "Is this because of my Metallica t-shirt with the vomiting skull?"

In a rare role reversal, Lorelai was the one to scowl as her stomach flipped. She had forgotten about that shirt. "I thought I told you to throw that out."

"I hid it on the bottom of my dresser for a rainy day when you pissed me off. Or when you tried to dress me up like a mathlete, apparently."

Boy did this kid know how to take the joy out of a fun gift. "The sweater is for Chilton. You got in!"

Jess dropped the bag and vest onto the floor. "What?" His voice was flat.

"You did it! You got in."

"How…" Jess's eyes opened wide in shock. "The principal?"

When they had applied for Chilton months ago Lorelai told him she would sleep with the principal to get him in if she had to.

Lorelai laughed. "No, honey, that was a joke. They had an open spot. You start on Monday."

"Really?" Jess asked. His voice was slow and hesitant, instead of upbeat and excited like it should have been. Was he not happy with this news?

Lorelai smiled through his apprehension, hoping her joy would catch on. Maybe the news was taking time to sink in for him. His life was about to change. "This is a good thing. This is what we always wanted. It's your path to Harvard. Remember how much you want to go to Harvard?"

Jess picked the bag and vest back up and stared blankly at it. It was still so hard to gauge what he was thinking.

"Whatever," Jess said. He left the room without another word.

Lorelai's smile turned into another scowl. "Um, aren't you supposed to, I don't know, react when hearing news? Any sort of reaction. Happy? Sad? Hungry? Feel a freaking emotion, Jess!" she yelled at the door.

Sookie picked up a bowl and started mixing. "Oh, you know how he is. He's not a 'wear your heart on your sleeve' kind of guy. He's reserved. Quiet. Stoic, even."

"But this is huge," Lorelai said. She gestured wildly in the air. "Life changing...and...nothing. Just a 'whatever.' Well, whatever to you Jess. I don't care."

"You totally care."

Lorelai sat down, pouting now. "I totally care. I just want him to feel something."

"Anger!" Sookie said. She pumped a fist into the air.

"What?"

"Jess feels anger. A lot. Boys got one pair of lungs on him. Learned his ranting skills from you I presume."

Lorelai crossed her arms. She glared at the doors Jess had just walked through. Why did Jess have to ruin this with his bad attitude? "Ranting is the only time I ever get complete sentences out of him. The rest of the time it's just monosyllable huhs and yeps and nopes," she said.

She prayed Jess would return through those back doors with the realization about how great this life-changing news was, but as the minutes ticked by Lorelai realized she wasn't going to get the celebration she wanted. It would be okay. Jess would come around and learn to be happy with this new arrangement.

* * *

Jess stood in front of his school locker and took a deep breath. This would be the last time he opened this locker. The last time he stood in this hallway. Jess never considered himself a sentimental person, not like his mother, but he felt it today. It wasn't that he liked Stars Hollow High or would miss it—the work was too easy and he often felt like he was surrounded by morons—but it was comfortable. It was familiar and had built-in safety nets. He had no idea what to expect at Chilton.

There were numerous novels spilling out of the locker. Most were books he had already finished since the school year started. A few were ones he was still working on or were planning to get to. His textbooks had already been returned to his various former teachers.

A cardboard box sat next to Jess's feet. He dropped his things into it, one by one. When Lorelai told him to bring a box to pack his things in, he thought she was exaggerating. He didn't think he would have so much stuff. But he just kept piling papers and books and little mementos into the box. It was nearly filled to the brim now.

"Isn't it a little early for spring cleaning?" Dave Rygalski asked. Jess hadn't noticed him approach.

Jess and Dave had been friends since middle school. He was basically Jess's only continuous friend, his best friend if Jess was being sappy. Jess wasn't sappy.

Jess bent over the box as he neatly arranged the books. He didn't want them getting bent.

"I'm leaving," he said and stood up.

He pulled off the pictures taped to his locker. There was a five by seven poster of Jack Kerouac above his Offspring stickers, which were seared into the locker. He was careful to peel the poster off the locker, making sure not to tear its edges, and placed it neatly on the top of the box. He didn't bother attempting to pick the stickers off.

"I don't think you need all your stuff to go home for the night." Dave bent over and picked up the picture of Kerouac. "Unless you're working on your Beatnik collage."

Jess snatched the picture back and put it back in the box. His locker was nearly empty now except for his jacket. He put that on, then slung one strap of his backpack around his shoulders, lifted the box and kicked the locker door closed with his foot.

"I'm leaving school," Jess said. He headed for the nearest school exit.

Dave immediately followed. "What do you mean?" he asked while opening the door for Jess.

"I mean I don't go here anymore." Jess walked down the steps of the entrance of the school. A few classmates Jess never spoke to were sitting on them, talking. They moved slightly to make room for Jess and Dave to walk by without tripping. On the lawn a group of guys were tossing around a football.

"What do you mean you're not going here anymore?" Dave asked.

"Don't know how I could make it any clearer. Packed up my stuff. I'm leaving." Jess looked up at the sun. It was awfully bright, but it didn't do much for the current cold snap they were in.

Dave continued to follow Jess. "Why do I get the feeling that Miss 'My Son  _Is_  Going to Go to Harvard' isn't going to be okay with you quitting school?"

"I didn't say I was quitting school. Just leaving that one. Got into that prep school Mom made me apply to."

Jess wasn't sure why he was giving Dave so much attitude. Maybe picking a fight with him was just easier than leaving behind his best friend. He walked toward Luke's and attempted to quicken his pace but Dave easily kept up. He wasn't the one carrying a heavy box.

"Then why didn't you just say that in the first place? You had me worried you were doing something crazy and stupid. Not that that would be out of character for you."

Jess stopped in the middle of the street and turned toward Dave. His expression had transformed into a scowl. "Would you just stop harping on this? I don't want to talk about it. Lorelai didn't ask me if I wanted to go to another school. She made the decision for me. Just like she always does. Because she pretends to be the cool mom, and as long as you go along with every single tiny demand she has she's your friend, but as soon as you try to carve your own path she plays the mom card."

That wasn't fair to Lorelai and Jess knew it. She was only trying to help him, and they both knew if he stuck around at Stars Hollow High, unchallenged and bored, he would get himself into more trouble. Last year was a handful of detentions and a suspension. What would happen this year if Jess stuck around at this school?

A car drove toward the two. It honked but the two teens didn't move. It honked again as it maneuvered around them on the street. Dave fidgeted, but when Jess stayed put and didn't make a move towards the sidewalk neither did Dave.

"Your mom just wants what's best for you," Dave said.

"My mom just wants what's best for herself." Again, Jess was saying things he didn't necessarily believe. Why was he being so hard on Lorelai?

Jess started walking again, and this time Dave didn't follow. Jess changed directions and walked home. He had planned to meet Lorelai at Luke's so she could drive his stuff home instead of making him lug it around town, but now he didn't much care to see her.

* * *

Lorelai and Jess sat across from each other in silence at a table in Luke's. Jess was particularly moody lately. Technically, he had been moody since he turned thirteen, but the last twenty-four hours he had been worse than usual.

If that wasn't bad enough Lorelai was dealing with her own problems. She couldn't afford Jess's tuition. She had racked her brain for ideas to fund him but the only idea she could conceive was something she had promised herself she would never do. The only way Lorelai could afford Jess's tuition was asking her parents for the money, so that afternoon Lorelai sucked up her pride and visited her estranged parents. Her parents, millionaires who raised and suffocated her with false love until she ran away, were just as cold and uninviting as she remembered. She told them about her situation and they agreed to loan her the money, but only if she agreed to the following one condition: weekly Friday night dinners.

It was horrifying. Lorelai spent her whole life trying to escape them and with one swoop they were back. She traded her freedom for Jess's education. Jess was worth it, though. She always did what she had to for her kid.

Jess continued to sit in silence, just staring at the table while they waited for their burgers. Lorelai had stolen his book again, but instead of lightening the mood and forcing him to talk to her it only pissed him off and further drove a wedge between them.

Well, Lorelai had to slip the news in at some point. She would have to bring Jess along with her to the dinner, after all.

"Oh, I forgot to tell you. We're having dinner with your grandparents tomorrow."

That got Jess's attention. He looked up with his trademark scowl.

"But it's September."

"So?"

"So what holiday is in September?"

"It's not a holiday thing. It's just dinner."

Jess opened his mouth then closed it. He shook his head. "Whatever."

Luke came by and served their burgers. "Red meat can kill you," he said. "Enjoy." Well, Luke was as charming as ever. Lorelai picked up her burger and took a bite.

"I don't understand why we're going to dinner tomorrow night. You hate your parents."

"I do not hate my parents."

Jess mumbled something incomprehensible under his breath.

"Yes, I have issues with my parents," Lorelai said.

God knew she had issues. Her mother, Emily, was the more controlling parent; Lorelai was expected to live up to a certain standard and when she inevitably fell short Emily would passive-aggressively shame Lorelai. It was Emily's idea to institute Friday Night Dinners. Her father, Richard, was cold and distant. Growing up he would go to work, come home, have dinner and then go to bed. If she was lucky he might ask her how her day was. Most nights she wasn't lucky. That house was a nightmare, and that was why Lorelai left as soon as she could. It was why her parents were barely involved in her adult life or with her kid. Things were about to change, though.

"But I tolerate them," Lorelai added.

"Well, that's very loving of you."

Lorelai glared. She was sick of this attitude. Dinner would be hard enough without Jess's backlash. "I will not have you mock my relationship with my parents. You of all people should know what my issues with them are."

Jess banged his fist against the table. It shook and the silverware upon it clattered. "Then why the Hell are we seeing them?"

"Because!"

"Great reasoning." Jess picked up a fry, stared at it, and then dropped it back on the plate. He still hadn't touched the burger.

Lorelai felt like she had been slapped. She was used to Jess giving her a little attitude, but this was a new level. "What the Hell is your problem Jess? You've been in this funk since yesterday."

Jess rolled his eyes but didn't answer.

Lorelai leaned across the table and reached out her hand. She touched Jess's forearm. Clearly there was something deeply wrong with her only child and she needed to fix it.

"Tell me what's wrong," she said.

Jess pulled his arm away. "Leave me alone." He stood up and stormed out of the diner, without having taken a bite of any of the food.

Lorelai sat with her mouth agape for a moment before collecting herself. She left money on the table for the burgers then chased after Jess.

"Jess! You do not just take off in the middle of us talking."

Jess turned his head back while still plowing forward. He walked by Patty's Dance Studio as she counted off beats for her dancers. Patty continued counting the beats, but at a quieter volume, obviously listening to the scene unfolding right in front of her.

"You were talking. I just wanted to eat my dinner," Jess said.

"You need to talk to me," Lorelai said. "We used to talk. Why don't you talk to me anymore?"

"Because I'm not ten. I don't need to go to my mommy for my problems anymore." Jess continued walking, out of earshot of Patty. Lorelai caught up with him and grabbed his arm. He easily slipped out of her grasp.

"This whole 'the world can bite my ass' shtick is going to get real old real fast. In fact, it already has."

"Thanks for the insight, Dear Abby." Jess quickened his pace, and Lorelai found it impossible to keep up with him in her heels. Jess reached the house first. He slammed the front door behind him. By the time Lorelai entered Jess was already in his room.

Lorelai took a deep breath before she opened Jess's door. She needed to be the calm, rational one. Them both screaming at each other would not solve any problems.

Jess was already sitting on his bed, with  _As I Lay Dying_  in his hands. Lorelai hoped he didn't choose that novel because of wishful thinking.

"I'm your mother," Lorelai said, her voice calm and soothing. "I'm here to help you, guide you, find solutions to your problems."

Jess peered up from his book and glared. When Lorelai didn't leave and instead took a seat at the edge of his bed Jess put the book down and leaned forward.

"You don't get it. You are my problem."

"Me? What did I do?" Lorelai felt a lump in her throat. Sometimes Jess could be too mean.

"Forget it." Jess leaned back on the bed, propped up by only his pillow.

"No, tell me what the Hell I did to piss you off so much and put you in such a foul mood." The anger was back and there was nothing Lorelai could do to starve it off again.

Jess rolled over to his side, breaking their eye contact. "It doesn't matter if I talk to you about it. You never listen to what I have to say." He turned back up at her for say his final words of the argument. They cut the air like knives. "You're just like your mother."

The room spun and Lorelai got a terrible case of vertigo. She wanted to run out of that room, for Jess not to see her cry, but she couldn't get onto her feet. How could Jess say such a terrible thing? He knew her relationship with her mother. It was like he was trying to hurt her.

Lorelai concentrated on her breathing and wiped her eyes. Finally, the equilibrium was restored. She didn't say another word to Jess. She just walked out of his room and slammed the door behind her. She waited until she reached her own room to let out the sobs.

* * *

By Friday the ice between Lorelai and Jess still hadn't thawed. Jess skipped his daily breakfast at Luke's with Lorelai, and then ignored her after school. Once they arrived at the Grandparent's house for dinner, Lorelai's apprehension of entering wasn't helping the situation. She had dragged Jess against his will to Hartford on a Friday night but was now refusing to ring the doorbell. She just stood outside the manor sipping her coffee.

"So, do we go in or do we just stand here reenacting the Little Match Girl?" Jess asked.

"Okay, look, I know you and me are having a thing here, and I know you hate me but I need you to be civil," Lorelai said. "At least through dinner and then on the way home you can pull a Menendez. Deal?"

Jess gave a non-enthusiastic nod. Finally, Lorelai rang the doorbell. Emily Gilmore opened the door. She smiled. Neither of the younger two Gilmores said anything.

"Well, you're right on time," Emily said.

The last time Jess was at this house was last Christmas. The holidays were the only time the family ever got together, and only ever at this house during Richard and Emily's parties. His grandparents had never been to Stars Hollow.

As Lorelai and Emily made small talk and argued over where to throw Lorelai's coffee cup Jess hesitantly walked into the house. He had never been alone in the house with just his mother, grandparents and their staff before. It made the place seem even larger than usual. Jess loosened the tie Lorelai made him wear.

Emily caught up to Jess and grabbed his arm, looping her own around it. He nearly jumped out of his skin at the touch. He didn't like to be touched, and even less so when he wasn't expecting it. "I want to hear all about Chilton," Emily said.

Jess sighed and attempted to do his best Stepford impression. He most likely fell short but Emily didn't seem to mind. "Haven't started yet."

"Richard, look who's here," Emily said as they entered the living room. Richard was sitting on a sofa reading a newspaper. Glasses framed his face.

Richard peeked up from his paper. "Jess." He looked the boy up and down. "You've grown."

"Puberty's been kind," Jess said.

"Still growing?"

Jess shrugged and took a seat on the couch across from Richard's.

"Jess," Emily scolded. "Your grandfather asked you a question." She was at the drink cart.

"I don't know," he said through his teeth. What a ridiculous question. He wasn't a doctor. He didn't spend his evenings making height predictions on charts.

Lorelai joined the room. She took a seat on the couch next to Jess.

"Well, your mother's tall," Richard said. "And your father's tall. You'll probably be tall." He went back to reading his newspaper and didn't say another word until dinner.

"Thanks for the anatomy lesson," Jess said under his breath.

Emily walked over with a tray of drinks. "Champagne anyone?"

Lorelai stood up and took a glass. "Oh, that's fancy!" She sipped it before they even did a cheers.

Emily handed a glass of a slightly different color liquid to Jess. "Sparkling apple juice," she said.

"Fun," he muttered. Everyone else would be able to drink away their miseries about being stuck at this awkward dinner, but not him. He was fifteen so he had to suffer.

"What did you say?" Emily asked as she passed the last glass to Richard.

Jess cleared his throat and put on a fake smile. "I said 'thank you!' " These people were really starting to grate his nerves. At least when Jess and his mother came over for holiday parties the attention was spread out. He was usually able to slip away unnoticed and hide in his mother's old bedroom. There would be no hiding tonight.

After a little more chit-chat and drinks, during which Jess tried to avoid the conversation and answered direct questions in only monosyllable responses, dinner was ready. As they walked to the dining room Lorelai pulled Jess aside.

"Hey, I thought you agreed to be civil," she said. She had already drunk a martini in addition to her champagne and Jess could spy from his spot in the hallway a wine glass in front of her plate. It must have been easy for her to judge his poor attitude from way up there on her tipsy high horse.

Jess glared at her. "This is me being civil. I'm sorry that I don't have the good-hearted nature of Opie but this is me giving a genuine effort."

"If this is you nice, I'd hate to see what you're like when you're actually trying to be a jerk."

"Maybe you'll see on the car ride home," Jess threatened.

"Hey that Menendez offer was a joke."

Emily walked back toward Lorelai and Jess, immediately shutting up the younger two Gilmores. Condescension dripped off Emily's voice. "You know, we all got up to go eat dinner together?"

"Yes, I know mother," Lorelai said. She looked down at her feet.

"Would you like me to send the food back and for your father and I to go back to the parlor for another drink?"

"No mother. We're coming."

"I don't see why you two couldn't have had this conversation before dinner. We were all in the parlor together and you two barely said anything. Why is it suddenly so important to talk now? Why can't this conversation be had at the dinner table?"

Lorelai sighed and marched into the dining room. Jess meekly followed, avoiding eye contact with either grandparent. He didn't want to incur anymore of his grandmother's passive wrath.

Emily smiled to herself and strolled back to her seat. She unrolled her napkin and placed it delicately on her lap. "Ah, finally we're all here. Now we can have dinner at last."

* * *

Dinner was filled with mostly awkward silence. Lorelai and Jess were still in a tiff and not talking. Emily tried to engage Jess in conversation, but he wasn't biting. Richard spoke even less than Jess. Lorelai's contribution to the conversation was only cracking jokes. Emily's attempt at small talk about the food failed miserably.

Jess just wanted to eat in peace and leave. He still didn't know why they were even having dinner here.

Eventually, Jess's father was brought up. Jess learned a long time ago that following Christopher was usually hurt feelings and tears.

"He was always a smart one, that boy," Richard said. "You must take after him."

The room suddenly went tense. How dare Richard compare Jess to the man who abandoned him? As Jess glared at his grandfather he thought about how nice it would be to be a Kryptonian. If there was ever a need for heat vision.

Jess didn't get the chance to tell off his grandfather. Lorelai left the table in a huff first, reminding Jess of the fact that he wasn't the only one Christopher abandoned.

The three remaining Gilmores sat in silence. Richard went back to eating his lamb, but Jess and Emily exchanged glances at the door. Finally, Jess stood up from the table.

"Where are you going?" Emily asked. She stalked Jess out of the room when he went to find his mother.

Lorelai was in the kitchen, washing dishes. If it wasn't so sad the sight would've been amusing. Lorelai didn't even do the dishes at their own house. Dirty dishes were part of the reason she hated cooking. Emily and Richard must have really pushed a button.

"Lorelai, come back to the table," Emily said.

Lorelai threw the plates into the sink. They clattered and from the sound of it may have even broke. She turned around, her eyebrows pinched and nose flared, but the expression soften when her eyes landed on Jess. "I'm not having this out right now," she said.

Jess leaned against the kitchen island. This night had turned into a shit-show. He couldn't tolerate it anymore and a small part of him wanted to shield his mother from any more upsetting comments. "Can we go?"

Emily glared at him. Apparently, the glare was a family trait. She turned back to Lorelai. "If you leave before dinner's over you're not getting-"

"Don't say it!" Lorelai shouted.

Jess looked between his mother and grandmother. They were talking in code. They had some sort of secret between them. "What's going on?" he asked slowly, trying to figure it out on his own. What would lead to a random dinner in the middle of September? Were there any extenuating circumstances? Any recent changes in their lives? Jess tried to calculate all possible reasons.

"Nothing," Lorelai said. "Go back to the table," she said.

Lorelai should've known better than to think Jess would just listen to her commands, not when he was curious. He was going to keep picking at this until someone broke.

"Are you two in cahoots?"

No one answered.

"Grandpa's dying and you're scared of being cut out of the will? You and Sookie are finally going to open an inn of your own and need a loan? You're pregnant and need a full-time babysitter?"

"Shut up Jess!" Lorelai screamed.

Jess frowned and looked down at his shoes. Maybe that last one hit a little too close to home, what with the circumstances of why Lorelai had such a strained relationship with her parents.

"Maybe you should just tell him," Emily said. "He's a smart boy."

"Smart like Christopher?" Lorelai retorted.

"You father didn't mean anything by that comment. He likes Christopher."

"Oh does he? Because I seemed to remember Dad not liking Chris so much right after I got pregnant."

Emily pursed her lips and looked at Jess. "Let's not talk about this right now."

"He knows he's the product of teen pregnancy, Mom. I've never hid my past from Jess."

Jess felt cold. This was exactly the fight he hoped to avoid. He didn't need to be reminded of how unwanted he was and how his existence ruined everyone's lives. He wanted to run before this argument could occur, but it was too late now.

"Well, I'm glad you have standards. I'm glad you and Jess have no secret." Emily's words dripped with sarcasm. Jess tried to avoid his own self-loathing by wondering about the secret Lorelai was keeping from him. "It's certainly a relationship I always aspired to have with my daughter," Emily continued, "but I guess we can't all be that lucky with our children." Emily stormed out of the room.

Jess looked at his mother, pleading with his eyes that she would tell him the truth about tonight's dinner.

Silence hung in the room instead.

"If you're not going to tell me I'm leaving," Jess finally said. "I'll see you in the car." He headed for the door.

"Wait." Lorelai bit her lip. She breathed in and out a few times. "I couldn't afford Chilton."

Jess turned around to face his mother and put his hands in his pockets. "That's okay. I didn't really want to go."

Lorelai shook her head. "You need to go. I know how unchallenged you are at Stars Hollow High." She crossed the room and put her hands on Jess' shoulders. He flinched, but she kept them there anyway. "You're so smart, you know that. I know all mothers think their kids are smart, but you just amaze me. You need a school that can keep up with these brains." She ruffled his hair.

Jess swallowed and noticed how dry his throat was. "Not a big deal. Don't worry about it."

Lorelai stomped her foot. "It is a big deal…that's why I came to mom and dad. I asked for a loan."

"What?"

Lorelai never took any help from anyone. She was a self-sufficient woman. She literally called herself by that exact phrase just the other day.

"And part of the deal is Friday Night Dinners."

There was silence again. Jess mulled over the idea. The whole reason Lorelai put up with this dinner, and was willing to put up with more, was for him? It made his head spin. As much as he hated the dinner he knew it was ten times worst for Lorelai. How could he act so spoiled and throw this gift back in her face when she was willing to sacrifice so much for him, including the pride and independence that she so dearly treasured?

"Dinners? As in plural?" Jess asked.

"Yeah. Every Friday night until…well ever, I guess. Or I cough up enough to buy myself out of this Devil's contract."

"Okay," Jess said quietly.

"Huh?" Lorelai asked.

"I know it was hard for you to go to them but you did it for me. So…I'm grateful for that, at least."

Lorelai pulled Jess into a hug and rested her chin against his shoulder. "You're the best kid ever, you know that?"

Jess squeezed his mother back. Normally he hated hugs, but times of vulnerability were the exception. Sometimes you just really needed the closeness of another.

"You okay?" Jess asked when the hug ended.

Lorelai wiped her moist eyes, smudging her eyeliner. "I really don't want to talk about this."

"Ironic, huh? You being the one to not talk?"

"So you'll go?" Lorelai asked. "To Chilton?"

Jess wondered if it was time to break the tension with a joke. Probably not. "Yeah, I'll go."

Lorelai smiled and stroked his cheek. "You're going to do great. A mother knows these things." Her eyes flashed to the door. "Shall we venture back into the Dark Side Cave?"

Back to the psychological torture that was Grandma and Grandpa—would they continue to pick at all of Lorelai and Jess's insecurity? Would this continue to last for, well, however long it would take Lorelai and Jess to pay back the loan—it didn't seem like they had much of a choice. Jess squeezed his mother's hand for reassurance and then walked with her back toward their tormentors.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is a story about swapping Rory and Jess’s lives. Jess is now the son of Lorelai Gilmore and Rory is the daughter of Liz Danes. I know it’s kind of a weird idea, but I’ve always been interested in the Jess and Lorelai dynamic, which I think was criminally underrepresented on the show, and I wanted to write a story about them as family. Then the whole story spiraled from there. I’ve kept everyone’s personalities mostly intact: Jess is still surly and anti-social, Rory is still kind and Bambi-like, but now Jess and Rory must go through the events of each other lives and see how their own personalities would react to each other’s trials and tribulations.
> 
> There is a lot to this story, with many different subplots. It's going to be long, very long, and take place over the course of a year. Rory won't appear in chapter one but she will have a large part in chapter two. While romance has a large role in the story, the platonic relationships between friends and family are the real drive. For those shippers out there will be multiple love triangles involved Rory, Jess, Paris, and Tristan. There are will also be some heavy topics and themes explored, but any and all upsetting content will be warned at the start of each chapter.
> 
> I’d also like to take a moment to thank all the people on the r/fanfiction Discord server for all their help with writing this story. They helped me not only with my ideas but also with the finer technical details of writing. They’re awesome people and I one hundred percent recommend them and the r/fanfiction subreddit.


	2. New School, New Girl

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry it took so long for me to upload chapter 2. I wish I had a good excuse but honestly, I was just procrastination by playing the Sims. I was playing as Gilmore Girls characters at least! Good news is this chapter finally introduces Rory! I hope you enjoy!

_Ring. Ring. Ring._

Lorelai groaned. The ringing phone had seeped into her dream, becoming the voice of her dream husband, Tom Cruise. Every time he opened his mouth to speak he rang instead. Finally Lorelai's consciousness broke through to reality, and the dream disappeared, along with their dream home where she and Tom lived in a gingerbread house along with talking ferrets. It was a weird dream. Certainly not a metaphor for something else…at least she hoped it wasn't.

Still laying on the bed Lorelai opened one eye. The ringing continued. She reached for the phone, unsure exactly where it was coming from other than somewhere of the vicinity of her floor. She leaned over the bed, feeling a touch of vertigo as she fought off her sleepiness, rifled through a pile of laundry, and made contact with the phone.

"Whoever this is you better be bleeding and have forgotten the number to 9-1-1," Lorelai answered.

"Is that how you greet your phone?" Emily's shrill voice asked.

Lorelai sat up straight at the sound of her mother's voice. It was half instinct from all her years of being coached to be a debutante and half from pure shock of receiving a phone call from her mother at this ungodly hour.

"Mom? Why are you calling this early?"

"Early? It's eight-ten." Emily was nearly screaming.

Lorelai laughed. "Mom," Lorelai said in her mother-soothing voice. It was the same voice she used when Sookie was freaking out over a menu. "It's a quarter to six."

"Eight-ten, Lorelai."

"Quarter to six." Lorelai picked up her fuzzy alarm clock that was in the shape of the cat. She gasped. "Oh my God, it's eight-ten."

"That's what I said!"

Lorelai tried to hop off out bed but instead got her foot stuck in her sheets, and tripped onto the ground. "I don't understand. I set my alarm for a quarter to six. It didn't purr."

"Purr?"

"It's fuzzy. It purrs." Lorelai got off the floor and ran down the stairs, the phone still against her ear. She sprinted through the living, through the hallway, and into the kitchen.

"You were supposed to be here at eight, on the dot. Get Jess registered. Meet the headmaster. Now you've made Jess look like a delinquent. You've besmirched the Gilmore name."

Lorelai stopped short outside Jess's room. His loud snores echo into the kitchen. "What do you mean here?"

"At Chilton."

"You're at Chilton?"

"Of course. Now, why aren't you?"

Lorelai struggled to come up with one of her patented, trademarked snarky retort, perhaps because she knew she was at fault for this mishap. This was Jess's first day of school and he was late. A better mother would have never let that happen. Emily would have ever let that happen.

"Clearly we're running a little late," Lorelai said at last. She entered Jess's room. It was such a mess. Piles of t-shirts and books littered the floor. Lorelai poked her son. He didn't even stir.

"A little late?" Emily screamed. "Your meeting was fifteen minutes ago and it takes a half hour to drive here. Are you even dressed?"

"Of coursed Mom. Headed out of the door right now. In fact, you're holding us up." Lorelai ripped the comforter and sheets off of Jess. He groaned and rolled over onto his stomach. How could he be such a heavy sleeper?

"Well, you'll still be forty-five minutes late."

"Gotta go Mom."

"This is unacceptable."

"Bye!" Lorelai hit the end button and tossed the phone into Jess's dirty clothes pile. Then she grabbed Jess's arm and dragged him off the bed, dropping him on the floor. He hit it with a thud.

Jess groaned and sat up, staring at Lorelai while he wiped the sleepiness out of his eyes. "Are you mental?"

"It's eight-fifteen!"

"And that's crazy time?"

"You were supposed to be at Chilton at eight."

Jess rolled his eyes and picked himself off the floor before he plopped back on the bed. "I'll just go tomorrow."

Lorelai grabbed her son again, pulling him off the bed once more, but this time onto his feet. "Dress. Now!"

Jess glared at her but reluctantly walked over to his closest in silence.

Lorelai left the room and ran back into her own. She needed to get dressed too. She opened the closet, expecting to find all her nice clothes greeting her but was met with nothing—nothing of any substance, anyway. It was laundry-day, Lorelai remembered. All her nice clothes had been taken to the dry cleaners. She had planned to pick them up this morning but now it was too late. She had nothing to wear. She ripped through her closest, throwing what little clothes were left to the floor and screamed in frustration.

Finding something nice was going to be impossible. She just needed to put something on, to put anything on. She focused on finding a shirt, pants, and shoes. The final ensemble consisted of a random t-shirt—a pick, tie-dyed one, a very old pair of cutoff shorts, fraying at the end, and brown ankle boots.

Once dressed Lorelai raced downstairs, hoping Jess would skip the hair gel. When she reached the living she realized how foolish she had been to think her son would ever skip his haircare routine. "Eight-twenty, Jess!" she called through the door while she put her hair in a ponytail. "Do your hair in the car!"

Jess exited the bathroom, dressed in his new Chilton uniform: a light blue collared shirt, khaki slacks, and a navy blue blazer. He had a striped blue tie draped around his neck.

"You need help tying that?" Lorelai asked once her own hair was up. Jess stared at her, not saying a word. She searched the desk by the foyer for her keys then looked back at Jess who was still staring. "What?"

"Didn't know the rodeo was in town."

"Alright, that's it." Lorelai walked over to the end table and opened its draw. She pulled out a picture. It was a behind shot of a naked baby: Jess. She flashed it into his face before hurrying toward the door with it safely guarded in her hands. "I'm bringing the baby pictures." She headed for the door with every intention of following through with that threat if he didn't pick up the pace.

"What? No!" Jess followed his mother as she led him outside with her taunts of personal betrayal and embarrassment. "I thought I burned those."

"Not the negatives!"

* * *

 

A half-hour later the Gilmores pulled up to Chilton. Lorelai parked the Jeep in the temporary parking lot outside the main building. Everything about this high school campus screamed old money. This parking lot was paved with stone and had a fountain in the middle of it. The buildings, of which there were three, were all made of gray brick. Once parked neither the mother nor son could peel their eyes off the gargoyles attached to the roof.

Weeks ago when Jess and Lorelai visited Chilton for the first time the school seemed so much less intimating. They were last-minute add-ons to the last tour of the season. Spots were already filled, and everyone there was just trying to get onto the waiting list. Jess didn't take the tour seriously. Even if some spot opened up for him he still wasn't going to go to Chilton. There was no way Jess Gilmore was ever going to private school.

"Harvard's a private school," Lorelai told him during an argument at Luke's the night before the tour.

"When Harvard starts instituting a uniform then it might be time for us to reconsider the plan," Jess responded.

"This school could get you into Harvard."

"I'm already top of the class at Stars Hollow High," Jess said.

"You also got into a lot of trouble last year, Jess…I just think a school change might be a good idea. Can you please just consider it?"

Jess agreed, if only to stop his mother's nagging. All the spots were filled anyway, so it wasn't like he'd ever actually have to attend. At least that's what he thought. The last few days proved how very wrong he was, and now he was sitting in the car outside of the most prestigious private school in Connecticut wearing a stupid uniform and a tie he was pretty sure was on wrong.

"I remember it being smaller," Jess said, breaking the silence.

"Yeah," Lorelai said. "And less…"

"Off with their heads," Jess finished her sentence.

"Yeah." Lorelai tilted her head, looking at something.

"What are you looking at?"

"I'm trying to see if they're a hunchback in that bell tower."

Jess unbuckled his seatbelt. "Am I right in assuming I'm going in alone while you go meet the Duke Brothers?"

Lorelai made a grab for her purse. "I still have the baby pictures."

"I'll start a car fire, just you try me."

Lorelai cracked a smile and lowered her purse. "Get going. I don't know who's going to be more upset by you being late, the school or Emily."

"What?" Jess asked. How was his grandma going to find out he was late?

"Oh yeah, Mom's here. Have fun." Lorelai plastered on a fake smile and waved goodbye to him.

Jess stayed seated in his seat and glared at her. "You were just going to send me in the lion's den with no preparation? What the Hell is wrong with you?"

"No. I just told you. This is me telling you."

"But only because it slipped out. You weren't planning on telling me. We were in the car for thirty minutes and you neglected to mention that Grandma is here."

"Well if I told you earlier you would have spent the last half hour freaking out about having to see her. See, I saved you third minutes of panicking. You're welcome." When Jess didn't accept that response she added. "She had to prove that one of the Gilmore's could show up on time."

"This is so not cool of you."

"Chill dude, I told you."

"Whatever." Jess got out of the car and slammed it as hard as he could. He took satisfaction in the way Lorelai flinched at the sound.

As Jess walked through campus he pulled out his registration form and looked around for any signs that could point in him in the right direction. There were no signs. There were no people either. It was probably well in first period. It would be so easy to ditch his first day, but he had made a promise to Lorelai. He had to give Chilton a real chance.

The form said he needed to meet with the Headmaster in the Ambroise building. As Jess stood in the campus courtyard debating which building to enter he finally saw another student. It was a blond boy wearing a matching uniform. He seemed to be wandering out of choice instead of confusion. Since he was the only soul around Jess had no choice but to ask him for help. There was a smug smirk on this guy's face as Jess approached.

"Do you know where the Ambroise Building is?" Jess asked the boy.

The boy stared Jess up and down. "You new?" He hadn't answered the question.

"Yeah. I need to see the Headmaster. Ambroise building?"

"You know, I think I heard Paris complaining about the new students they're letting in."

Jess sighed. He was so not in the mood for small talk. He just wanted to know where to go so he could get this day over with already. "Ambroise building?" he repeated.

"Do you know why they've let so many of you in? Is your mom sleeping with Headmaster Charleston?"

Jess glared.

"Oh, touchy subject. Note to self, does not like Yo' Momma Jokes."

"Headmaster's office?"

"One building back, on the left. Go down the stairs and turn left. Office is at the end of the hall." Jess turned back in that direction. "I'm Tristan," the boy shouted out after him. Jess didn't offer his name.

Jess found the building easily enough now that he had directions. He entered the office where a receptionist sat behind a desk. In the waiting section sat Emily, her lips pursed.

"There you are." Emily sneered. She stood up in one swift motion. "Tell Hanlin my grandson has arrived," she told the receptionist, then turned back to Jess. "What is wrong with you? This is your first day at this institution. Don't you know how important it is to make a good first impression?" Her eyes wandered around the room. "Where's your mother?"

"She had to go." Jess put his hands in his pockets and looked at the wall. What right did Emily have to lecture him? She wasn't his mother. Just his grandmother. Until recently when she blackmailed them into the Friday Night Dinners he saw her maybe twice a year. This woman barely knew him. She had no right to lecture him.

The back door of the room opened, revealing an office. A short, balding man with a white beard appeared, clearly Headmaster Charleston. "Emily, I'm glad to see you're still here." His smile was clearly fake.

Emily turned around and her demeanor completely changed. "Hanlin! Oh, this is my grandson. He is terribly sorry about his tardiness. There…was an emergency. That's why his mother can't be here. But it's okay, I can fill in for her, get her all the notes she'll need."

Jess was beckoned inside and he and Emily sat in the two seats in front of Charleston's desks. Emily was a master charmer it seemed.

"Hanlin, did you know Jess has a 4.0 grade average?"

"You don't think they included that in the transcript, Grandma?"

Emily glared at Jess. It was a good thing looks can't kill. She turned back to Charleston, instantly smiling again. It was kind of freaky how easily she could slip in and out of moods like that.

"He has a healthy sense of humor. Gets that from his mother. But he is a very special boy. You take good care of him."

"We'll do our best, Emily." Emily then segued into goodbyes, leaving Jess was left alone with the headmaster.

Charleston looked over Jess's transcript. "You're obviously a bright boy, Mr. Gilmore."

Jess shrugged. He knew he was smart. He didn't need some pompous, self-righteous ass to reaffirm that.

"Good grades. But some social issues. You get in trouble a lot."

"Gosh golly gee, don't tell me those permanent records are real."

Charleston lifted his head up from the transcript and studied Jess for a long moment before shuffling through the papers again. Jess's cheeks turned bright red and he looked down at his shoes. Mouthing off to his old principal was so easy, but for some reason snarking at Headmaster Charleston made him feel ashamed.

"You were suspended for pulling a fire alarm?" Charleston asked.

"It was a hot day," Jess said. Jess pulled a quarter out of his pocket and flipped it through his fingers, trying to feign disinterest. He couldn't let Charleston see him squirm. "Thought everyone might like a break to go outside."

"You think your antics are amusing, do you?"

Jess shrugged.

Charleston reached over the desk and pulled the quarter out of Jess's hands.

"Hey!"

"Chilton is a serious school for serious academia. We do not tolerate misbehavior nor pranks nor disobedience. Your grades and aptitude may have outshone your transgressions and gotten you placed at the top of the waiting list, but don't think for a moment that guarantees your invulnerability. Richard and Emily are old friends of mine, but that will be of no benefit to you. I don't play favorites or give out favors based on nepotism. And based on your behavior in this meeting it's clear I'm going to need to keep a close eye on you. You're on very thin ice young man, do you understand? Now, do you have anything to say for yourself?"

Jess knew what the logical thing to say was. He should apologize and ask forgiveness for his attitude. Things would be so much easier if he just played along with accepted social conventions and didn't give everyone a hard time for no reason. Apologizing was the correct answer. Instead he said, "Can I get my quarter back?"

* * *

Emily left the Headmaster's office. Anger boiled in the pit of her stomach, making her want to scream into the Heavens, but she kept a smile plastered on her face until she was in the car. She couldn't let the people at Jess's new school see her upset. She had to make a good impression here. One of the Gilmores had to, after all, and it seemed it would be Jess or Lorelai.

Oh, the nerve of those two. That attitude of Jess's, and Lorelai didn't even bother to show up. Jess would be lectured later on the proper behavior of a gentleman since clearly Lorelai never taught him, but Lorelai needed a prompt tongue lashing right now.

Emily reached her car, entered and slammed the door behind her. She didn't mean to slam it; it just happened. She threw her purse on the passenger seat and it landed harder than expected, spilling open. They had her waiting over an hour. They wasted her time, Hanlin's time, and the entire school's time. Why go to a school like Chilton if you weren't going to take it seriously?

Emily took a deep breath and lowered the visor so she could look in its mirror. There was a vein popping out of her neck. She really needed to calm down. No, she really needed to yell at Lorelai.

Emily reached for her purse and pulled out her cell phone. Richard's company had supplied him with one a few years ago and he found it so convenient that he bought her one too. And it was convenient. It meant she could get in touch with her daughter from anywhere. She found Lorelai's contact information and dialed.

"Uh...hello?" Lorelai asked.

"Where the Hell are you?" Emily barked.

"Did Jess not show up?"

"Of course he showed up. You didn't."

There was a groan from Lorelai's line. "Mom, it was Jess's meeting, not mine."

"Family was supposed to be there," Emily said. Why was this such a hard concept for Lorelai to understand? Good family standing was key to good social standing. If Jess wanted to success anywhere then he would need his mother's support and his grandparent's influences.

"Well you were there. What's the big deal?"

"The big deal is the reputation you're cultivating. You're making yourself look like a disinterested parent." When her daughter didn't respond she yelled, "Lorelai!"

"Mom, I'm driving. I was making a turn." She sighed. "Look, I couldn't make it. I'll make the next one, kay?"

"No, not 'kay'. You're destroying your son's academic future."

"Pretty sure by getting him into Chilton I've jump started it."

Lorelai could be so naive. How she and Jess survived all these years without Emily's influence and guiding hand she would never know, but it stopped now. She was finally apart of their lives again and she wasn't going to let Lorelai's stubbornness ruin Jess's life anymore. "Chilton's just the first step," Emily explained. "You have to develop a relationship with the staff. You need recommendations from them."

"Jess can get recommendations on his own."

"Really? Have you spoken to the boy? He makes you want to slap him."

"Hey, that's my son," Lorelai scolded. "You don't ever talk about him like that."

"Well you raised him to have no manners," Emily said. "That's what happens when you give children free rein and no boundaries."

"You think suffocating him like you did with me would be better? We both know how that turned out. All my life you made me feel trapped and insecure. I swore to never do to him what you did to me."

There was a pregnant pause, the most ironic kind of pause given the topic of conversation.

"Look, can we stop this before one of us says something we regret?" Lorelai asked.

Emily sniffed and rubbed her eyes. She struggled to stop the cracking in her voice. "I fear that's already gone too far."

Emily hung up the phone and tossed it on the passenger seat. It bounced off and onto the floor. She didn't want to cry, but hearing Lorelai talk to her like that broke her heart. Why did Lorelai hate her?

* * *

Jess arrived at his first class, which was actually his second scheduled class for the day. That's what happens when you show up to school over an hour later. As he entered he noticed three girls, two blondes and a brunette, sitting in a cluster staring at him. One of the blondes was glaring, while the other two girls smiled.

"Can I help you?" the teacher asked.

Jess handed the teacher his hall pass. The teacher accepted and read it. "Ah, class, we have a new student joining us today. Mr. Gilmore, would you like to tell us something about yourself?"

"No." Jess walked over to an empty seat and sat down. It was closer to the front than he felt comfortable with, and right next to those staring girls, but a new school meant a new environment. He imagined all the kids at this prep school were nerds and wouldn't judge him for sitting up front like a teacher's pet anyway.

The teacher went back to the history lesson and Jess caught himself drifting off. He could barely pay attention. Back at Stars Hollow High he never paid attention during class because he absorbed the information so quickly from just reading the textbooks. There they just went over the same boring shit he had already studied days before. Here, though, he was already struggling because he had no frame of reference. He wasn't up to date on these lessons. For the first time in his life he felt confused and his brain wanted to shut down. He found himself doodling in his notebook instead of taking notes.

The bell rang sooner than expected and Jess realized all he had written down were a few names and vague dates in addition to his drawings of stick figures being eaten by sharks. No concrete information. Jess packed up his things and headed for the door but the teacher stopped him and called him over. The teacher had a thick three inch binder in his hand, then went on to explained the test policy and handed Jess the binder. It apparently covered an overview of last week's notes. Just last week's, and only an overview. The teacher suggested a more in-depth version from another student. What had Jess gotten into?

Carrying the oversized binder Jess left the classroom. A short blonde girl, the one who had been glaring at him earlier, was waiting for him. He nearly ran into her. Despite her tiny stature she was still intimidating. Jess attempted to look intimidating back, but wearing khaki's didn't do much for the effect. He didn't know how the tiny girl pulled it off.

The two other girls from class stood on the other side of the hallway, waiting. The blonde one wore too much makeup and her skirt was shorter than every other girl in the hallway. The brunette and had a dopey looking smile on her face.

"I'm Paris," the tiny, intimidating girl said.

The name sounded familiar. Tristan had said it earlier.

"Not too big on the personal space, I see," Jess said.

"I know who you are, too. Jess Gilmore, from Stars Hollow."

"Don't go spreading that around. I've got a rep to build. Stars Hollow doesn't exactly scream badass."

"Neither do khakis, nimrod. If you're looking to make your bones maybe don't go to the number one preparatory school in the country. This is a school for future Senators, not thugs."

"Connecticut."

"Excuse me?"

"Chilton is only number one in Connecticut and only according to some rankings. Apparently there's one in Bridgeport that tends to out rank Chilton depending on the publication."

Paris stared at him blankly then asked, "Why are you even here?"

Jess shrugged. He wasn't quite sure of the answer.

"Look, I'm top of the class and intend to be valedictorian."

"Don't tell me they've got you taking collections for your own congratulations card."

"Just stay out of my way, farmboy, and try not to mess up the curve too much." Paris looked him up and down one last time, shaking her head. "You know you'll never catch up. You'll never beat me. This school is my domain. And don't you ever forget that."

Paris stormed off. The entire interaction was just so over the top that Jess could hardly believe what had just happened. This tiny little blonde girl seemed like a villain straight out of a teen girl movie.

Paris two friends began to follow, but then the blonde one stopped and turned back to Jess. She bit down on a pen, showing him her pout, overly glossed lips, then said, "Aw, I think she likes you."

What was this idiot going to do, give him a lecture about how he didn't moisture and that's why he'd never be the cutest boy in school?

Before he could get away from her the girl opened up his blazer. He was too stunned to move. She pulled out his cell phone from the breast pocket and opened it. Was she stealing his phone? Why would a rich girl want a cheap hand-me-down Nokia that was already three years old?

She typed something in it. Jess was too bewildered to ask what she was doing. She handed the phone back.

The phone was left on contacts. There was a new one added, Louise.

The girl, Louise, reached forward and stroked his cheek with her index finger. "One of these nights you'll get cold and lonely." She made a phone motion with his hands, sticking out her thumb and pinky finger. She brought the hand up to her ear. Call me, she mouthed.

Louise walked away.

Things at Chilton just got very interesting.

* * *

After Jess was dropped off Lorelai was finally able to pick up her outfit from the dry cleaner, the one with the flippy skirt—not that it mattered anymore. Emily was right, she and Jess had made a terrible first impression to the school. She only hoped it wouldn't have a last effect on Jess's education.

The argument over Jess didn't end with that one phone call on her way back home either. Emily was starting to meddle into their lives, calling her about buying Jess all sorts of Chilton brand clothing. Lorelai finally agreed to a coat but stopped Emily short of buying Jess a parking spot that he didn't need since Jess didn't even have a full license yet, never mind a car.

Basically, this whole day meant she was in desperate need of Luke's coffee. After coming in super late to work she also took off early. Ah, the perks of being the boss. She had planned a half day at work today anyway so she could be back in Hartford by three to pick up Jess at the end of class.

"Excuse me?" a teenage girl said as Lorelai walked past Doose's Market. Lorelai didn't recognize her. She had long brunette hair was and dressed sweatpants and a hoodie. She wasn't carrying anything except a small, black notebook. She definitely wasn't one of Jess very few friends. Maybe she was in town for the upcoming festival. Star Hollow really knew how to pull the tourists in.

"Do you need directions?" Lorelai asked.

"Yeah!" the girl said with pep and excitement. "I'm looking for a place—I'm sorry, I don't know the name. It's a diner."

"Luke's?" Lorelai asked.

"Yes! That's it! " The girl smiled wide and her eyes caught a reflection off the sun, making them shine an impossible blue.

"Oh, it's only a block away," Lorelai said. "I'm headed there right now, why don't you follow me?"

The girl nodded and followed in step with Lorelai.

"So what's your name?" Lorelai asked. She was always friendly, it was why she rose in the hospitality business so easily and quickly.

The girl bit her lip and hesitated before answering. Lorelai took note of that. "Rory," the girl finally said. Lorelai wondered if this girl had just made that up on the spot. It was beginning to become clear that this girl wasn't an ordinary festival goer, not if she had some reason to lie about her identity.

Lorelai told the girl her own name. They crossed the street next to the market, walked past the flower shop and then arrived at the diner. "Here we are!"

"Oh that was close," Rory said. "I guess I should have kept looking instead of bothering you."

"No bother. And hey, you see the hardware store sign over the door?" Lorelai pointed to the old sign right outside the diner that read William's Hardware. "Probably never would have found it on your own without my help. Not unless you also wanted to buy a hammer."

Rory's brow wrinkled but she followed Lorelai inside. "Why is there a hardware store sign?" she asked

"Well this used to be a hardware store," Lorelai explained. "The owner, Luke, converted his dad's old hardware store into a diner but kept the sign. Sentimentality, I guess." She sat down at the counter. When Rory didn't follow her, but instead just stood by the door staring at the diner in bewilderment, she beckoned the girl over.

Rory blinked a couple times but then finally sat down next to her.

Lorelai grabbed a menu and handed it to Rory. "Everything's great."

The girl reached through her pockets and pulled out a single, crumpled dollar bill. She tried to hide this from view from Lorelai but failed. This poor thing had next to no money.

"I just want coffee," Rory said, the pep gone from her voice. She crumbled the dollar back into her hand, hiding it from view, and glued her eyes to the counter.

Lorelai, on the other hand, couldn't take her eyes off the girl. Maybe it was maternal instinct or maybe something about this girl reminded her of herself at the same age. Fifteen years ago she showed up at the Independence Inn with no money either, except she had also had a baby to care for. She got lucky, really lucky and the inn owner, Mia, took pity on her and Jess and gave them a place to stay and her job. Maybe it was time to pay it forward.

Luke came over to the counter. "What are you doing here?" he asked.

Rory visibly tensed up. She looked up and her eyes finally peeled away from the counter and stared at him. Luke didn't seem to notice the effect he had on this girl. He didn't seem to notice the slight shakes her hand hands that she tried to hide under the counter.

What could have caused such a reaction? Nothing good. This girl was scared of Luke even though he hadn't said one word to her. The terrible reasons of why a random man could cause a girl to be so thoroughly scared filled Lorelai's mind.

Lorelai tried to act casually, hoping it would calm down the girl beside her before she could gather unwanted attention from the gossip-starved town. "See, now, that's why you were voted Mr. Personality of the New Millennium. Where's your crown?"

"I just mean you usually don't come in at this time," Luke said.

"Well, I have to pick Jess up from school."

Luke poured Lorelai some coffee then turned to Rory. "Coffee?"

"Um…" Rory crinkled the single dollar bill in her hand. "Sure."

"Anything to eat?"

Rory bit her lip and crinkled the dollar again. She shook her head.

Coffee was exactly ninety-nine cents, never mind tip. This poor girl couldn't afford to eat.

"Are you sure?" Lorelai asked.

"I'm not hungry." Rory didn't sound convincing at all.

Lorelai rhythmically tapped her fingers on the counter. "Get her some French toast. Do you like French toast?"

"Oh, I—"

"Don't worry sweetie, new customers eat for free." Lorelai turned to Luke and half-whispered, "Right Luke?"

Luke looked back and forth between the two as he tried to decipher what was going on. Lorelai nodded and smiled. Finally he agreed.

Rory crinkled the dollar one last time then put it back in her pocket. Maybe she knew what they were doing but she didn't call them out on it. Sometimes hunger trumped pride. "Okay…but could I get pancakes instead?"

Luke wrote it on his pad.

"With M&Ms—if it's not too much trouble, that is." Rory blinked those blue eyes that seemed impossible to say no to. She looked way too sweet to be living on the streets. How did she end up this way, all alone in Stars Hollow?

Luke looked between the two again while Lorelai nodded and smiled again. Apparently he realized he couldn't say no to this girl either.

"No problem at all."

"And whipped cream!" Lorelai shouted.

"Is this your meal or hers?" Luke asked.

"Oh, that sounds good," Lorelai said. Her stomach suddenly growled like it had a mind of itself own. She hadn't come here for food, but all this talk pancakes and candy made her feel famished. "Make me the same thing, but use chocolate chips instead. And hot fudge!"

"Don't you have to pick up Jess? I thought you just came here for coffee?"

Lorelai shrugged. "You got me hungry. Besides, Jess was an hour late to school today. Him waiting an extra ten minutes won't kill him."

Luke wrote the order on the notepad and walked away. Lorelai turned to Rory, smiling and giggling. It seemed that during the banter Rory's fear of Luke dissipated.

"I love how my eating habits disgusting him. I mean, you own a diner, get used to tasty food. Sometimes I just order the strangest food combination I can think of to see what shade of green he'll turn. It's always delicious though."

Rory smiled.

"So you do smile," Lorelai said. "I scared I was dealing with another sullen teenager."

"Another?"

"My son," Lorelai explained. "Typical teenage angst stuff. Good kid, though."

Luke came out with two plates of pancakes, one topped with whipped cream, another with fudge. He served them to the girls.

"You barely seem old enough to have a teenager."

Ah, this conversation. It always seemed to come up when Jess's age was mentioned. "I barely am," Lorelai admitted. "Had him at sixteen." She didn't ask the girl how old she was and she silently said a prayer that she wasn't running away for the same reasons. Just because this girl didn't currently have a baby in her arms didn't mean that would be true in a few months.

Lorelai took a bite of the pancakes. Her eyes nearly rolled back in her head from clear in enjoyment. "Mmh! How does he do it? How can someone who hates food so much make it so good?"

Rory had the fork in her hand but she wasn't eating. She stared at Lorelai, unblinking. It was a bit unnerving. "I'm sorry. I should have realized," Rory said. "My mom had me young, so I get that. I shouldn't have said anything."

Lorelai held another piece of pancake in midair. Fudge dripped down from it. "No, no. I'm used to it. Besides, you were much sweeter than most people. Now eat. It's really good, I promise. "

Rory nodded and took her first bite. She finally closed her eyes and moaned, an even more ecstatic reaction than Lorelai's. How long had it been since she last ate?

"You like?"

"Definitely." Rory started shoveling it in her mouth.

"Good," Lorelai said. Rory took a few more bites than Lorelai asked, "…so why you're here?"

"Excuse me?" Rory asked with her mouth still full of food.

"Sweetie, I ran away from home when I was about your age. I can recognize the signs."

Rory stopped eating mid-bite, leaving her mouth left wide and open.

"It's okay," Lorelai said. "I understand. I can even empathize. I had my reasons to run away. And my life turned out okay. More than okay. I have a great life now. But I had people who helped me. I wouldn't have made it on my own here without a little help. So let me repay the favor and help you."

Rory dropped the fork. She jumped off the stool and made a dash for the door.

Shoot, she spooked the poor girl. Rory had only had a few bites too. Lorelai wanted to run after her but she was gone so quick and there was no way Lorelai would be able to keep up with her in heels.

Luke returned to the counter. "You scare her off by trying to give your pancakes their own voices again, didn't you?"

"Shut up and get me a refill." Lorelai's phone rang for the umpteenth time today. She was going to be more than 10 minutes later to pick up Jess.

* * *

It was last period when Jess finally found his locker, and when he tried to unlocked it, it wouldn't open. He tugged and tugged and it only unstuck after he gave it a big jerk. He lost his balance and went stumbling backward, just as Paris was walking down the hallway, carrying a large sculpture. The sculpture was knocked out of her hands and broke in half as it hit the ground. Paris growled at him, she literally growled, and picked the sculpture up, throwing it in the trash. She stormed off into a classroom while shouting for Jess to get away from her. Great, he pissed off the class psycho.

Jess looked at his class schedule and noticed that the room she had just entered was his next class. There was no way he was going in there.

He continued down the hall instead. Being the new kid met he could always use the "I got lost excuse" for being late for class, so there was no risk of getting in trouble for bunking.

At the end of the hallway there was a bathroom and he entered to find Tristan standing by the window, blowing cigarette smoke outside. When Tristan noticed Jess he tried to quickly put the cigarette out.

"Where'd all this smoke come from?" Tristan waved his hands through the air and threw the cigarette out the window.

Jess ignored the smoke. He opened Tristan's blazer and found the pack and lighter in the breast pocket. Jess stole a cigarette and lit it before returning the pack to the pocket. Jess took a long drag and blew it in Tristan's face.

"So we cool?" Tristan asked.

"I won't tell if you won't."

"You look like you're having a rough first day?"

"I destroyed that crazy blonde chick's diorama," Jess said.

"Paris?"

"That's the one."

Silence hung in the air as Jess took another drag.

"She's rough around the edges," Tristan said, "but you just have to learn how to handle her. Flirt with her and she'll do anything for you, including your homework. Actually makes life easier."

Jess took another long drag. He noticed Tristan wasn't smoking anymore. Just standing there talking. Was he trying to bond or something?

"Look, thanks for the cigarette, but I'm not trying to start the Breakfast Club the Next Generation."

"I don't think they were exactly trying to strike up a friendship in that movie either," Tristan said.

"Get the message. Leave me alone."

Tristan straightened out his blazer and checked his hair in the mirror. "You know, this place probably wouldn't be so rough on you if you didn't act like such an ass." Apparently satisfied with his looks Tristan turned on his heel and left, leaving Jess all alone to contemplate how he ever got stuck in a place like Chilton.

* * *

After the mysterious runaway left Lorelai got a call from Babette saying some men were stalking her house. It turned out that they had been hired by her mother to install DSL. Lorelai quickly shushed them away and chastised her mother for once again trying to get needlessly involved in herself in buying Jess some useless thing. Maybe it was a good sign that Emily was trying to get involved in Jess's life. Maybe it meant she wasn't holding a grudge over this morning's phone call. However, it still didn't excuse the intrusion. She went to her parents for tuition money because it was her only option. She wasn't going to take anything else from them for them to hold over her head.

She really needed to leave to pick up Jess now. She was late enough as it was. Lorelai started her Jeep again and sped through town, but when she passed the town square she noticed Rory sitting on the gazebo, reading a book she didn't seem to have earlier. There really wasn't any time to stop and talk to this girl, not if she wanted to prevent Jess from getting pissed about being forgotten, but guilt at how things were left with Rory was gnawing at her. She'd take another hit with her relationship with Jess if it meant she could help this girl.

Lorelai parked the Jeep on the side of the road and walked over. Rory didn't look up or acknowledge Lorelai in any way. She didn't seem to notice Lorelai at all.

"What'cha reading?" Lorelai asked. She sat down next to Rory.

Rory was startled and fumbled with the book. She almost dropped it on the ground. "Oh—uh—I'm going to return it."

Lorelai looked at the spine of the book. Property of Stars Hollow Library.

"Library books are supposed to be borrowed."

Rory frowned. "I don't have a library card," she confessed. "At least not at this library."

"How'd you get it out without the alarms going off?"

"When I was seven my mom lost her purse. My library card was in it. She was too busy to come to the library to get me a new one, at least for a few weeks, so I…kind of figured out how to demagnetize books on my own—of course I never kept them longer than the allotted time period and always returned them." Rory's face had turned bright red and her voice was getting squeaky.

"Wow," Lorelai said in amazement. "You've figured out a foolproof way to shoplift and all you do is participate in out of system libraries."

"This isn't like shoplifting."

"Of course it's not." Lorelai laughed. "I'm just impressed with your responsibility. Most kids who knew how to do that wouldn't be so mature. Heck, I'm not sure if I'd be so mature."

"Businesses take the cost of loss when you steal."

Lorelai smiled. This was a good kid. Whatever caused her to wind up on the street was not something she deserved. She deserved help. "I know…where are you staying?"

Rory clammed up again. She gripped her book tightly and her eyes darted around the surrounding area. "Around." A simple, one-word answer. Lorelai was used to those, having Jess as a son, but she was hoping she could get more out of this girl.

Lorelai couldn't let Rory bolt again. She had to be careful. She pulled a business card out of her purse. "Well if your plans fall through, if you need a place to stay, come by the Independence Inn."

"I don't really think an inn is in my price range."

Lorelai smiled. "No, no, of course not. See, when I moved here, oh fifteen years ago, I showed up at the Independence Inn. I had nowhere else to go. A had a little baby and no money and I needed help. The owner, Mia, she could have turned me away. But she let me and my son stay in the potting shed. It doesn't sound like much but it was our home for ten years. It's beautiful. And yours if you want it. I worked as a maid at first and then I worked my way up into running the place."

Rory ran her fingers over the card. She slid her thumb over the word manager. "Maybe."

"Okay. Well, I'll be around town if you ever need help or someone to talk to or whatever. I have to go pick my son up from school but I'll be back in about an hour. I'll…be at Luke's around dinner time, okay?"

Rory nodded. She put the business card in her pocket and gripped her book again. Clearly she was waiting for Lorelai to leave so she could read. Lorelai didn't dally any longer. She left the gazebo, and Rory, and went back to her car, desperately hoping that the girl would take her up on the offer and let her help. She feared what would happen to this girl if she didn't show up at Luke's tonight.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading! Comments and concrit is always appreciated. 
> 
> I also wanted to take a moment to talk about a comment I got on FFN. There I received a review with the totally legitimate concern about why Jess and Rory's personalities are the same as the show if they grew up in vastly different circumstances (though most people seem to appreciate that I kept their personalities intact). The comment also implied that if Rory grew up with Jess's backstory she would be a victim of sexual assault. My tl;dr response is yes, I have considered how growing up in different environments would affect Jess and Rory's personality, and no, this story will have absolutely no sexual assault in it.
> 
> While writing this fic I really had to balance the argument of nature verse nurture. Psychologists believe that our genetics and our experiences both play about a fifty-fifty percent influence on a individual's personality. So when I decided to transplant established characters into a different home environments I had to consider how the nature verse nurture argument would factor in.
> 
> My headcanon is that the canon Jess had a poor and unstable upbringing that may have even been a bit traumatic at points. I also believe he might have some social anxiety and depression. Now being raised with Lorelai instead would mean he'd have a much more stable and happy upbringing. But I think his temperament would still be somewhat similar. I see a young Jess, without the influences of any environment, as being quiet and impulsive and maybe even a little flippant. So I kept those traits as apart of his personality And since there is a genetic component to them, I don't think it's far fetched to write him as developing depression and anxiety in this new environment too. Overall I'd think he'd be a bit more well adjusted but he'd still have a similar personality. And that's how I tried to write Jess.
> 
> Rory, on the other hand, now has Jess's traumatic backstory, but I created different coping mechanisms for her, because she's a different person. I was also a little offended by the implication that if Rory grew up in Liz's home she would have definitely been sexually assaulted. While that could be a possibility for me to write about, that shouldn't be a given, and there are many other interesting and dramatic backstories that I'd rather write about. One in five women have been sexually assaulted, but that doesn't mean we should have to be reminded about this terrible reality with every female character. I just don't want to write about sexual assault, at least not at this point in my life. I'm going to say it right here and now: While I am keeping Rory's backstory a mystery for the time being, she was not sexually assaulted.


	3. Nobody's This Nice

Rory didn't come to Luke's. She was nowhere to be seen in the whole town. Jess, of course, was in a mood all of Monday night, obviously pissed about her late pickup. Tuesday morning he was in a slightly better mood and got breakfast with her at Luke's, but made sure to get in a snarky comment about how reliable the bus was before he left.

The whole time at breakfast Lorelai stared out the window hoping to see another sign of Rory. There were no signs. It was like she was a ghost, gone from the town forever. Lorelai failed her before she ever really got a chance to help.

Defeated, Lorelai walked into the Independence Inn and saw Michel standing behind the reception desk.

"There is something you need to take care of."

Lorelai let out a groan. Already with the demands. "I need coffee," she said. She already had three cups at Luke's that morning but it appeared that wouldn't be enough. She headed for the kitchen. Michel stepped out in front of her, stopping her from getting her coffee. A bold move.

"This cannot wait!" Michel said.

"Always so dramatic," said Lorelai.

He pointed out at the lobby. Lorelai turned to see what he was pointing out. It was early so there were few folks around. Not even Drella, the harpist, had arrived yet. An elderly couple was strolling arm in arm toward the door, a bellboy was headed for the stairs and a young lady was sitting on one of the couches, reading from a book. Lorelai could only see the back of her head. It was in a messy ponytail and there was dirt on her shirt. She seemed out of place in a fancy inn like the Independence.

"She said you told her to come here." Michel pulled out a crumpled business card. Lorelai's business card. Michel's nose twitched.

Lorelai slowly moved toward the girl, as if any sudden movement would make her scatter. Was it who she thought it was? As she got a look at the girl's profile she recognized the face. Rory!

"You came!" Lorelai said through a grin that went from cheek to cheek.

Rory was startled. She always seemed to startle easily. She put down her book. "Um, yeah." She looked at Lorelai for a second before looking at the ground. Her fingers tapped on the book. "You told me to."

Lorelai took a seat on the couch next to Rory. Rory slid a few inches away. It seemed like an involuntary reaction. Like Rory was scared of Lorelai and was trying to protect herself.

"You okay?" Lorelai asked.

"I just need a place to stay—I'll work for it."

"Where'd you sleep last night?"

The girl bit her bottom lip. She didn't answer.

"I'm assuming not indoors?"

Rory suddenly stood up. "I shouldn't have come," she announced and ran toward the door.

Lorelai couldn't let Rory take off again. She may not have been able to stop Rory from running yesterday, but she'd be damned if she didn't stop this girl today. "Rory stop!" she commanded in a booming voice. All activities in the lobby ceased for a moment and all eyes feel on Lorelai.

Rory froze in place and Lorelai ignored the watchful eyes. She sprinted across the lobby, her heels smacking the carpet hard and harder with each step. Somehow those wholesale priced shoes help up despite the stress she strained on them.

Finally, Lorelai reached the girl and grabbed her hand. Rory's eyes were wide and moist and her breathing was ragging. The poor thing had started to shake. A loose strand of hair had come off of her ponytail and was resting in front of her face. Lorelai pulled it out away from Rory's eyes and tucked it behind Rory's ear.

"Let's get you cleaned up. Get you some fresh clothes. Then we can talk about your future."

Rory nodded. Everyone else went back to mind their own business as Lorelai escorted the girl out of the lobby. Rory wouldn't stop shivering, though.

* * *

Jess arrived at his school a little before classes started. He felt nervous about having to go back. Yesterday was Hell. What would today bring? He smoked a cigarette outside the school's gates. Students and their parents walked by. A few looked at him in disgust. In less than twenty-four hours he was already a social pariah. No surprise there.

A man walked up to him. Tall, well dressed, dark hair. He seemed to be around his mother's age, maybe a few years older. He carried a briefcase. Clearly a teacher.

"No smoking on school grounds," the man said.

"Huh," Jess said and took a drag. He blew it in the man's face. "Well, it's a good thing I'm not on school grounds."

The teacher coughed and took a few steps back from Jess. His eyes were bugged out and nose slightly flared. Jess prepared himself for a lecture. "School grounds continues 100 feet past the fence." The man's voice stayed calm despite Jess's disrespect.

Jess was surprised he didn't get in trouble. He wondered how far he could push it. "Guess I'll just walk 100 feet that-a-way then." Jess began walking away.

The man grabbed Jess' backpack and pulled him back. The cigarette in his mouth almost fell out from the yank.

"No, because you're already on school grounds. If you leave, that's considered bunking."

"This is bull—"

"Watch it."

Jess rolled his eyes as he realized there was no talking his way out of trouble this time. In fact, if he kept it up he'd only be getting himself in more trouble. For once, he made the smart decision and complied, but that didn't mean he was nice about it. He took another drag before throwing the cigarette at the man's shoes. The man jumped back and yipped. Jess smirked and began to walk toward the school.

"Wait," the man said.

"What now?"

The man held out his hands. "The pack."

"What?"

"The cigarette pack. Cigarettes aren't allowed on school property. They're considered contraband. Hand them to me. Or do you want me to have Headmaster Charleston informed about this incident?"

Charleston had already made it clear that Jess on thin ice at this school.

"That was my last one," Jess lied.

"I don't believe that for a second."

Jess ground his teeth. This guy was really getting on his nerves. He reached into his blazer pocket and pulled out the pack. It was nearly new too. The teacher took it and Jess was forced to watch them get tossed in a nearby trash bin.

With a sneer on his face Jess was finally allowed to get away from this teacher. He wandered around outside for a few minutes until the warning bell rang, getting his last breath of fresh air for the next seven hours. Then he went inside and headed for his first class, the one he missed yesterday. When he entered he stopped in his tracks. Sitting behind the desk was the teacher he just had just had the confrontation with a few minutes ago.

The teacher turned and saw him. "Ah, you must be the new student?" The teacher acted casually, as if nothing had just happened between them, but there was a twinkle in his eye. The man flashed Jess a smile that didn't quite reach his eyes. "Jess Gilmore?"

Jess nodded.

The teacher extended his hand for Jess to shake. In his shock Jess accepted. "I'm Mr. Medina."

* * *

Before she knew was she was doing Lorelai had convinced Rory to get into her Jeep. Rory seemed to calm down as they drove through Stars Hollow, but Lorelai wondered what Rory was thinking? To her, Lorelai was still just some stranger. For all she knew Lorelai could be some serial ax murderer. But Rory sat there in silence, not giving Lorelai an idea of what was going on in that pretty little head.

The Jeep pulled down Lorelai's home street. It was dirt road tucked in by some trees. There were only a few houses, with Lorelai's at the end of the street. Lorelai lived on one of the more secluded streets in Stars Hollow, only lending creditability to the serial ax murderer theory she was sure Rory had conjured up. She parked in her unpaved driveway and got out.

Rory continued to sit in the car and stare at the Gilmore House. Lorelai's house wasn't huge, but it wasn't small either. Two floors, a nice porch, trimmed with white fencing. It was light blue with medium blue shutters. Homey. For a second Lorelai could imagine her and Rory hanging out on the porch swing, painting each other's toenails. Rory belonged in a house like this, not out on the streets.

"You coming?" Lorelai asked.

Rory exited the Jeep and made her way over to Lorelai. She looked at the house again. "Where are we?"

"My house." Lorelai walked toward her front door.

Rory followed at her heels. "Why?"

"I told you, you need to get cleaned up. You'll take a shower, I'll give you some clean clothes to wear. Have you eaten?" Lorelai fumbled with the lock before opening the door.

"Not since yesterday."

"I'll make you something. And by that, I mean I hope you like Chinese because that's about all the leftovers we have and leftovers is all I can make."

Rory didn't respond. She was too busy looking at things in the foyer and living room. It was a bit messy, clothes and magazines littered the floor and coffee table, but it was actually pretty clean by Lorelai's standards. Rory ran her hand across each piece of furniture, touching the desk by the window, then the couch, and then the shelf over the fireplace. She stopped there and held up each picture. First was a professionally done baby picture Emily had made of Jess when he was a few months old. Then she picked up one of Jess dressed as a pumpkin for Halloween when he was a toddler. Jess's latest school portrayed was next to that, and then there were some of their friends. The people in the photos were all familiar faces that Rory would probably meet if she stayed in Stars Hollow: Dave, Sookie, Luke. Lastly, she picked up one of the few pictures Lorelai had from her childhood. It was of Lorelai standing in front of her parent's manor.

"Is this you?" Rory asked.

"Yeah…I was, life, five or so when that was taken?"

"Trip to the local historical mansions?" Rory asked

"Something like that." Lorelai wasn't about to tell this girl how she ran away from a life of luxury and wealth. Rory might also be a runaway, but there was a pretty good chance she wouldn't understand Lorelai's reasons for leaving. The things Lorelai had imagined about Rory's background were so much worse. Yes, living with the Gilmores was terrible, but at least she always had food on the table and a warm bed to sleep in. She was never conditioned to filch at the sight of a stranger.

"Come on!" Lorelai said. "The good bathroom is upstairs, down the hall. I'll get lunch ready."

Rory nodded and took a few steps toward the stairs. Then she turned back at Lorelai. The woman was still smiling at her. "Why are you doing this?"

"I told you."

"But why are you being so nice?"

"I'm a nice person. I've got references!"

Rory shook her head. "Nobody's this nice."

"Well then I'll just have to prove you wrong."

Rory frowned. "I guess there's no use in looking a gift horse in the mouth, right? I'll be ready when you tell me what the real payment is." She went upstairs without another word.

Lorelai's heart broke a little. To be so young and so jaded. She would do everything in her power to prove Rory wrong and show her that there really are kind, selfless people who just want to help. She would be this girl's Mia.

While Rory was in the shower Lorelai searched through her closet to find something for Rory to wear. She couldn't find anything for the girl in the closet so she walked over to her dresser. She opened the top drawer, tugging hard because that draw always seemed to jam. The jewelry stand sitting atop the dresser jiggled as necklaces clattered into each other. Lorelai looked at them. She stared at one in particular. It was a locket which Lorelai knew to have two pictures inside. Lorelai hadn't worn it in years. When you live in a house where you can be surrounded by your favorite material possessions all day lockets don't seem like such important mementos.

Lorelai picked up the locket and opened it up. The pictures brought a smile to her face. The first was of her holding Jess. He was so small snuggling in arms. The picture had been taken only a few days after he was born. The second was of Jess, a few years older, maybe three or four, running toward the open arms of Mia. Mia had a huge smile on her face, ready to catch Lorelai's son in her loving arms. In the background of the picture Lorelai could see potting shed where she and Jess lived together for so many years. Those were good years. That was before Jess turned into an angsty teenager.

Lorelai rubbed her thumb over that second picture before bringing the locket toward her chest and holding tight. She wanted to go back there, relive those memories, seeing Mia again and Jess happy.

Lorelai unclasped the necklace and put it around her neck. It had been too long since she had worn it.

She continued searching for clothes for Rory and wound up finding a cute, floral print t-shirt and some black sweatpants that had been shrunk in the wash. Rory seemed a little skinnier than Lorelai so the tighter the fit the better. She headed down the hall just as the showered sounded like it was turning off. Lorelai walked over to the bathroom and knocked.

"I have some clothes for you," she said and placed them on the floor. "I'll just leave them by the door."

With Rory's clothes taken care of she went downstairs and into the kitchen. She took out two plates and the many boxes of leftovers. Lorelai starting making herself her own plate with her own favorites, which was basically just a mountain of all the different types of Chinese food piled on top of each other. She was putting it in the microwave as Rory entered the kitchen.

Rory was dressed, the clothes were actually a pretty good fit, and she held a damp towel in her hand that she was still using to squeeze her wet hair. Lorelai handed her empty hand a plate for the leftovers. "Dig in," she said.

Rory stared at it dumbfounded.

"I have a lot of different options. Kung Pow Chicken. Hunan. Sweet and Sour."

"You really like chicken, huh?" Rory asked.

"You're not a vegetarian, are you?" Lorelai asked. She hadn't even thought of that possibility before. She had no vegetarian options in the house. What was she going to do?

Rory shook her head. "Even if I was I don't think I could afford to be that picky right now. Thanks." Rory scooped a small amount of each box onto her plate.

"Uh-uh," Lorelai chastised and grabbed the plate from Rory. "Have you eaten since those pancakes yesterday that you only took five bites of?" She piled each box onto the plate like she had with her own. The microwave beeped and Lorelai exchanged the plates. She handed the heated up plate to Rory. "Here, you eat first. They're basically the same now."

"This is too much."

"So I'll send you back with leftovers. Haha, leftover-leftovers."

"I mean…I mean your generosity is too much."

"Nonsense. It's just food." But Lorelai knew it was more than just the food. It was the clothes, the shower, the offer of a place to stay. The microwave beeped again. Lorelai took her plate and sat down at the table. Rory sat down across from her. "Eat!"

Rory picked up a fork and took a bite. Her eyes nearly rolled back in her head. "Oh, this is so good."

It really wasn't. It was leftover's from Al's Pancake World, and as the name would imply his international cuisine was pretty subpar.

"So can I ask you a question, and it is a question that usually makes your eyes dart toward the door?"

"You want to know why I ran away?"

Rory wasn't playing coy anymore. She just full on admitted to being a runaway. Well, that was a step in the right direction.

"You don't even have any stuff other than a notebook and the clothes on your back. It doesn't seem like you put a lot of thought into this. Did you just hop on a bus and leave?"

"I just couldn't stay where I was anymore. And that's not me being dramatic. I really don't want to get into the details, just trust me, leaving was the only option."

"So why Stars Hollow?"

Rory shrugged. She stirred the Chinese food with her fork but didn't take a bite.

"You said a friend told you about it? About the festivals?"

"Huh? Oh, yeah. That."

"Which festival?

"Huh?"

"Which festival did you friend go to?"

"I don't know."

"You don't know? Your friend told you about Luke's Diner but not about the actual festival that they came to town for."

Rory shrugged.

"Come on, I get enough of this avoidance crap from my son. I'm trying to help you."

Rory's knuckles turned white. "You're not trying to help me. You're trying to help you over inflated sense of an ego by telling yourself you're helping some poor kid. But I'm not so naïve and clueless. I can take care of myself."

Lorelai's lip quivered. Was it true? Was this really just an ego boost? No, this was her paying it forward. Mia did this for her, and she was doing this for Rory and Rory would do this for another little girl. It was all circular.

Rory's furrowed eyebrows relaxed and she took a deep breath. "I'm sorry. I shouldn't have yelled. I've just had a really stressful couple of days."

"If I'm not handling this right…"

"No, you've been, like I said, just too nice. I'm not used to it. It's hard for me to accept that someone is actually being genuine and kind and really just wants to help. Do you still want to help?"

Lorelai smiled. "Of course." She watched as Rory eat another timid bite of the Chinese food and vowed to never give up on this girl.

* * *

Lunches at Chilton were better than most cafeteria schools. It better be for the price of tuition they were paying. The fruit looked freshly picked and the meats looked fully cooked. The students still had those metal trays ever cafeteria in America had, that were warped slightly from being power-washed too many times over the years, but that didn't affect the appeal of the meal. Jess placed a hamburger on the middle of the tray. It slid askew, toward the off-center warp. He took fries as his side, which also slid toward the warp. With a coke from the soda machine, his lunch was ready. Not very healthy, but it would've been Lorelai-approved.

Jess sat down at one of the tables closest to the door. The tables in the cafeteria were made of fine oak wood and had matching chairs. It looked less like a school cafeteria and more like a dining room in an upscale restaurant, albeit with teenagers dressed in matching uniforms. Jess was alone at his table. No one ever sits with the new kid. He plopped a fry into his mouth before opening his backpack. There was one of the seven class notes binders inside, the one from English class. There was just simply not enough room to fit them all, and his textbooks, and the rest of things, inside his backpack. He pulled out the binder and placed it next to his tray. It hit the table louder than he expected. How did these Chilton teachers ever expect him to catch up on all this material? How in the world was this just an overview?

Jess opened the binder to the first page. There was a table on contents. When a study binder needs a table of contents you know you're in trouble.

The chair across from him was pulled out and someone sat down. Jess looked up as Tristan stole a fry. "Reading anything interesting? I think War and Peace is a little thick for lunch."

Jess looked down at the binder before looking back up at Tristan. "Yeah, we all know how HarperCollins new marketing campaign is selling classics in 3-ring binder form now."

Tristan pulled the binder away from Jess and turned it his way. He looked down at the topic. "Shakespeare's a classic."

"Shakespeare is Mr. Medina's lesson plan."

Tristan put the binder back into place. He kept sitting there. Why was Tristan always hovering around him? Didn't he get that Jess didn't want to be his friend? Jess just wanted to be left alone.

"Having trouble catching up?"

"It's my second day," Jess said through gritted teeth. Who did this guy think he was to judge Jess? It was a lot of material. He'd like to see how fast it would take Tristan to go through 7 binders of just overview. Jess tried to ignore the other boy. He flipped the page open to the first section: Shakespeare's Biographical Information.

"You know who could help you study?" Tristan said.

"Somehow I don't think the guy who didn't know Romeo and Juliet is a tragedy is going to be any help," Jess said, referencing something stupid Tristan had said in class this morning.

Tristan's lips curled up into a smile. It seemed nothing Jess would say would upset the guy. Tristan was unflappable and took everything in stride. "Actually, I was thinking about someone who prided herself on being the smartest. Someone who's emotions were malleable. Someone sitting directly behind you."

Jess turned around. Paris was sitting one table away, lecturing her two best friends, Louise and Madeline, about how they weren't taking their studies seriously. How those three ever ended up together he would never know. Like Jess, Paris had a pile of study materials in front of her alongside her lunch. Louise and Madeline, on the other hand, were counting out portions from a snack-sized bag of Frito's as their desert to an all too skimpy salad. Jess turned back to Tristan.

"No."

Tristan laughed. "Why not. All you have to do is flirt a little. Compliment her hair then go in for the kill."

Jess glared at Tristan, hoping he'd finally go away.

Tristan stood up. Did it work? Did Jess scare him off? "Trust me," Tristan said, still as smug as ever. It didn't work. "Girls like Paris just was to serve guys like us."

Jess blinked. That caught him off guard. He tried to organize his thoughts before speaking. "What do you mean guys like us? What do you think I'm like?"

Tristan shrugged and then finally walked away, just as Jess had gotten interested.

What the Hell was Tristan talking about? "Guys like us"? Jess wasn't like Tristan. Tristan was a smug asshole who manipulated people and bought his way through life. He obviously paid his way into Chilton because he was clearly too dumb to get in on his own accord. He was nothing like Jess who grew up in a single-mother working-class home. Sure Jess's grandparents were from that world, but Jess wasn't. Had Tristan confused Jess for someone from the world of privilege? Is that why Tristan was trying so hard to form a bond?

Jess shook his head and tried to concentrate on the words in front of him. He was too distracted though. He wasn't like Tristan and the rest of these rich preps at this school. He slammed the binder shut and ran his fingers through his hair before leaning back in his chair.

"We have an English paper due at the end of the week, you dumb bimbos!" Paris yelled behind him.

Even though it clearly wasn't directed at him, Jess wasn't a dumb bimbo, Jess took the command to heart. He needed to get back to work. He had to write that paper too. He sat forward and opened the binder back up. Time to study.

* * *

With Rory clean and fed Lorelai brought her back to the Inn in a ride that was all too quiet. There were certainly a lot of things to think about, for both of them. Lorelai was making a list in her head of all the things she needed to do for Rory. She'd move Rory into the podding shed where she and Jess used to live, get her some work assignments, maybe put together a few more hand-me-down outfits to give to her. There were forms Rory needed to sign if she was going to start working at the inn, but Lorelai got the feeling that Rory might not be up to filling those out. Mia had paid Lorelai under the table for the first few months she lived there, until Lorelai turned 18. Mia would understand if Lorelai had to do the same for this girl.

Then there was the question of if Mia should be informed. She would probably want to know that Lorelai was giving back Mia's generosity to a new generation, but she also didn't want to put Mia is another hard position. Mia was the owner, after all, and Lorelai was heading into some legal gray area. It was probably best to wait until things settled with Rory before she told Mia what was going on.

Lorelai and Rory arrived at the inn and entered into the lobby. Michel gave them both the stick eye, which made Rory tense, but Lorelai just smiled and waved at him, pretending not to notice. She found a key behind the desk, the one to the podding shed, and returned to Rory.

Before they went to the podding shed, though, she wanted Rory to meet Sookie. They made a beeline for the kitchen.

Sookie was in the middle of preparations for lunch. Her assistances whipped by her as they added chopped vegetables to her soup and combined all sorts of ingredients together.

"Sookie!" Lorelai said with a smile almost as big as the one she gave Sookie last Thursday. "There is someone I want you to meet!"

"48-49-50," Sookie said, then handed a mixing bowl to one of her assistance. "50 more strokes. Not one more, not one less, you got that?"

"Si," he said and took the bowl from her.

Sookie joined Lorelai and Rory by the entrance as Lorelai poured two cups of coffee.

"You drink?" Lorelai asked

"Oh no—oh coffee?" Rory said. "Yeah, I drink coffee."

Lorelai handed her the first cup with a smirk. "You thought your new boss was trying to get you drunk before your first day even starts?"

Rory laughed nervously and took a sip.

"New boss?" Sookie asked. "You hired someone new? Are you kitchen staff? How are your dicing skills?"

"Oh, no, I can't cook. I think my culinary skills stop at opening a bag of instant mashed potatoes and adding milk."

Sookie frowned.

"I'm not kitchen staff, right?" Rory asked.

"No, no, no. Maid," Lorelai said. "And don't worried about not being able to cook. That's for Sookie's for. She'll fill you up with all sorts of goodies."

Sookie stared at Lorelai and Rory, looking them both up and down and blinking way too much.

"Hey, Ror, why don't you check on Carlos' batch of cookies." Lorelai pointed at one of the men by the ovens. "Sometimes he uses too much nutmeg, and I want your honest opinion.

Rory did as she was told.

"You think so?" Sookie asked. "I actually think is the problem is more of a cinnamon overpowering the cookie type thing—"

"Sookie. I was just trying to get you alone for a sec."

"Oh!" Sookie said, and then she lowered her voice to a hushed tone. "This about the new girl. What is the deal with that?"

Lorelai matched the quiet tone. "She's a runaway. Kind of like me when I came here."

Sookie made a gesture over her stomach.

"I'm not sure. She might be pregnant but it might be something else. It's just…"

"Mia helped you so you want to help her?"

"I'm that see-through?"

"No. You're doing a good thing."

"I hope so. I'm going to have her stay in the podding shed and put her on the schedule. Can you make sure to put a little food aside for her every meal."

"Will do…so…"

"So what?"

"So tell me about Jess and Chilton!"

Rory joined them back towards the kitchen entrance. She held three cookies in her hand and offered one to each Lorelai and Sookie. Sookie shook if off but Lorelai took one, leaving Rory with two. "They're really good," Rory said with her mouth full. "I don't think there's too much nutmeg…though I'm not really sure what nutmeg actually tastes like."

"So you want to know what Chilton is like?" Lorelai asked Sookie, bring the conversation back to Jess.

"Yeah!"

"Well me too." Lorelai bit hard into her own cookie, and a couple crumbs fell to the floor.

Sookie frowned. "Jess not feeling chatty?"

"Is he ever?"

"Well that could be a good thing. Nothing bad has happened yet. At least he hasn't been suspended yet."

Rory stood there silently, eating her cookie and Lorelai realized that she was airing her dirty laundry in front of a stranger. She shouldn't be making Jess look so bad, no matter how much he was annoying her. Time to talk him up.

"I told you he just needed a new environment. He's the smartest kid I know—and I'm not just saying that because I'm his mother. He's going to thrive in private school, I promise you."

Lorelai stole another cookie from Carlos and then hurried Rory out to the back garden. They walked across the neatly manicured lawn and toward a shed. Lorelai opened it and walked inside. Rory followed her.

"Well this is it," she said. She breathed in the dusty air, as if each particle was filled with memories of her early life in Stars Hollow. "Home sweet home."

"This was your home?" Rory asked. Maybe she didn't seem the charm yet. She would. Lorelai just had to help her imagine it.

"Yeah, for about ten years." Lorelai pointed to a corner. "We kept the beds there." She walked over to the other side of the room. "And we had a curtain over this half of the room and had a tub in here."

Rory nodded as Lorelai spoke but didn't say anything. She just needed time to adjust to the room. With a little TLC it would be just as it once was, and Rory would love it. "Thank you," Rory finally said, her voice strained.

"I know you don't have many, or actually, any things other than your clothes. By the way, you can keep the sweats. But I can get you some more things. I'll get you a mattress, and you can use the inn's sheets and blankets as long as you bring them to the laundry, just consider it a part of your job, and I can put aside a few more outfits for you."

Rory turned around and walked out of the podding shed. Lorelai followed and got outside just in time to see Rory fall to her knees, crying. Motherly instinct took over and Lorelai was on the ground next to her, fresh dry cleaning be damned! She pulled Rory into her arms and let the girl stain her blazer with tears while Lorelai stroked Rory's hair. Rory heaved against her as she cried.

Maybe she really hated the shed, but Lorelai didn't think so. You expect to stay in crappy places when you run away. There was more to this. Rory was keeping so much locked up on the inside. Hopefully in time she would learn to trust Lorelai and begin to heal. For now all Lorelai could do was hold the girl as she cried.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> First of all, I'd like to thank everyone who reviewed my story, but I'd especially like to Stellaluna.3 from FFN for the amazing conversations we've had about my characters and plot. They really helped me better my characterization of Jess, especially his study habits, which you will see more of in future chapters.
> 
> I respond to any and all comments, so if anyone would like to discuss plot or characterization or anything with me feel free to send me a message. I love discussing this kind of stuff at length, lol.
> 
> Also, someone on FFN asked a cool question regarding the premise of my AU and I thought the other readers might be interested in my response. To paraphrase, "Were Rory and Jess born at the same hospital on the same day and switched at birth?"
> 
> This is honestly something I've toyed with as a way to justify the outlandishness of this AU. The problem with this, though, is that I think it would be too unrealistic for this kind of slice of life story to not only a switched at birth plot, but one where a boy and a girl were switched at birth. It's an entertaining idea, but I don't think that's the story I want to tell. If you want to make this your headcanon for the fic, though, then by all means. Death of the author and all that.
> 
> If you're not going to subscribe to that kind of headcanon though, you still might be wondering how I justify Jess and Rory having their lives switched? Well, I don't. It's all just AU magic. I hope you can all suspend your beliefs enough to buy into this being a completely different reality where Lorelai has a boy named Jess who acts and looks like the Jess we know and love, and Liz has a girl named Rory, who acts and looks like the Rory we all know and love.
> 
> Anyway, thanks for reading, and please leave a comment if you enjoyed the chapter or want to give some constructive feedback.


	4. Meet Ugly

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Finally the chapter you've all been waiting for. Rory and Jess are about to meet! And Luke and Jess finally have a scene together too! However, don't get too excited, this is literally the most depressing and upsetting chapter I've written so far. There's no trigger warning or anything like that, but it's just depressing as Hell as we divulge into Jess's screwed up psyche. Fun, fun, right? Literati fans are going to have to hold on a little bit longer before for a scene you'll actually enjoy (unless you enjoy meet uglies and the torturing of your favorite characters :p)
> 
> Oh, and I told a few people this in responses to their reviews, but I want to reiterate that Luke is a major character, he just takes a while to come into focus. His first major arc will be coming in a few chapters.
> 
> Also, you may have noticed I changed the name of this story. I've been searching for the perfect name and this one finally came to me. Hope you like it!

The first big assignment Jess needed to concentrate on was a Shakespeare paper for Mr. Medina's class. Plays are very boring to read, so Shakespeare was actually quite the blind spot for the literati. Jess hadn't read any of them, other than Romeo and Juliet during ninth grade English. The rest of Medina's class had spent the first month of school bulking up on Shakespeare's plays, reading them, analyzing them, and even acting them out a bit during classes, then doing a close reading of the lines. On the other hand, Jess had a week to read them all, dissect them and write ten pages of a comparative analysis.

By the end of this Jess would never want to see another script again.

When he arrived home from school on Tuesday Lorelai had apparently decided to start her audition for the most annoying mother award.

"I think tonight is the night we take on the entire chicken column at Al's. I know we've talked about it for years, but I say we go for it!" She was stretched across the couch in the living room, reading takeout menus as Jess came in through the front door. He had planned to go straight to his bedroom but detoured into the living room to let Lorelai know he couldn't deal with any of her nonsense tonight.

His arms were full of binders that wouldn't fit in his tightly stuffed backpack. There were just too many books! His backpack couldn't even zipper all the way shut.

"They finally release the Pentagon papers?" Lorelai asked.

"School. Order whatever you want but leave me alone tonight." Jess rushed down the hall to his bedroom.

"Don't even want to know when dinner's here?" Lorelai called after him.

He responded with a slam of his door. It was rude, but Lorelai wasn't a person to take hints. It needed to be established early and clearly that he wasn't messing around. Jess placed the various binders on his bed and found the one from Medina's class. Sitting at his desk he opened the binder and skimmed the table of contents for the relevant pages.

There was a knock on his door and then Lorelai entered before Jess could give permission. Why did moms always do that? What's the point of knocking in the first place?

"As much as I'm loving the work ethic, it's the second day of school. Don't you think you're overdoing it?"

"I transferred in late," Jess said without looking up. Page 72 was the start of  _A Midsummer Night's Dream's_  notes. He flipped to the page. "I'm behind and have to catch up. Paper due on Friday."

Lorelai lingered by the door.

"Could you close the friggin' door and go away?"

"Hey, watch it! Don't give me that attitude." Her voice suddenly got softer. Maybe she could see how stressed he was. "Let me know if you need anything, okay?" Lorelai shut the door.

Jess went back to work. He skimmed the notes so he'd have a guideline of what to pay attention to, then opened his copy of the play. He read about Theseus and Hippolyta discussing their wedding, but by the time they move on to discussing Hermia's wedding Jess's concentration was waning like the moon. He tapped his pencil against the desk. Then the beat slowly morphed into the Dead Kennedy's "California Über Alles". From there a pencil rendition consisting of the Clash's "I Fought the Law", the Sex Pistol's "God Save the Queen", and a mish-mash of various Ramones songs—let's be honest, they all have the exact same beat—were played out.

Right as he was humming along to "I Want To Be Sedated", or maybe it was "Sheena Is a Punk Rocker" or "Rock & Roll High School"—who could tell—Jess realized his lapse in concentration.

"Shit," he mumbled to himself and got back to reading.

The problem was plays are so boring. They are meant to be seen, not read. He thought about asking his mother to act them out with him, but just knew she would love that too much. Not only did she love being asked for help, she had this thing about wanting to be needed, but his mother was just the kind of person to really get into it and overact, funny voices and all. No, he didn't have time for her nonsense. Besides, it would be much faster if he just read them. He just needed to concentrate.

A half-hour later Jess had unbent all of the bobby pins Lorelai had somehow left in his room, reorganized his CD collection, and unraveled a knit hat, but he still hadn't gotten past the first scene of  _A Midsummer Night's Dream._  What the Hell was wrong with him?

This was getting ridiculous. Jess got up and started packing anything that could distract him into a box: his playing cards, his magic trick props, every knick-knack that was in arm's reach. Only after the box was full did he realize this was just another procrastination technique. Goddammit!

Jess put the box onto the ground and tried to rethink this. He just needed to sit down and read. This shouldn't be so hard. He loved reading.

Jess went back to his desk and read a few more lines. Then Lorelai opened his door again. "Hey Jess—"

"Jesus H. fucking Christ, what do you want?!" Jess yelled at her.

Lorelai froze in place in the doorframe, her eyes wide. "Wooow," she said slowly, drawing out the O. "I don't know what I did to piss you off so much, but you better take it down about five thousand notches and watch the language."

Jess leaned over his desk and rested his head in his hands. He couldn't take this anymore. He had a fucking paper due at the end of the week but he couldn't get himself to sit still and actually read the material.

"Are you okay?" Lorelai asked. She walked across the room and sat down on the chest at the foot of his bed.

Jess sat up and turned on his chair to face Lorelai. "I'm fine. Just stressed."

"It's the second day of school."

"I already told you I have a paper."

"That's not an excuse for yelling at me like that."

"I know. Can you just lecture me after Friday? Please? I have to get back to work."

Lorelai seemed to mull the idea over for a few seconds. For once she moved the subject along. "Sookie just called my cell. She fell—she's okay but she pulled a muscle in her back. Says she doesn't need to go to the hospital. She made a mess falling to the ground though, knocked over like a whole bunch of jars of stuff. I'm going to go over, clean up, make sure she takes a pain pill and get her to bed. You gonna be okay here alone?"

"Will the sixteen-year-old be okay alone in his own room? Yeah, I think I'm good."

Lorelai reached over to tussled Jess's overly gelled hair. He ducked out of her grasp as soon as he noticed.

"You're not sixteen yet, kiddo. There's one more thing. An employee of mine, new girl, name's Rory, she's coming over here. She's kind of in a bad place. Actually, I'm letting her stay in the potting shed."

The potting shed. His first home, the first one he could remember at least. Jess didn't like to get sentimental, but still, that potting shed meant something to him. It'd only been about four years since they moved out, after all. Not that Jess didn't appreciate the upgrade, the potting shed had gotten quite cramped by eleven.

"So I'm giving her some of my old clothes, hand-me-downs if you will. She'll be over soon to pick them up, so I need you to let her in. Clothes are in a basket on my bed. And Jess, she's really fragile so no attitude. Be nice to this one, okay?"

The girl living in his potting shed. He wondered what she was like, why she had to resort to a crappy shed in back of the inn for shelter? Who was she and what was her story?

"Sure, sure. Now can you go away?" He hadn't meant for his words to come out so harshly but sometimes Jess didn't think before he spoke. What he meant to say was that he would be nice for once. This girl was in a similar predicament to the one they were in fifteen years ago, after all. He could empathize with that, at least.

Lorelai let out a heavy sigh, signally her disappointment in his rudeness, and then finally left. He frowned. After his last outburst he really wasn't trying to be a jerk, but it still came out that way. Sometimes Jess couldn't help it, and he hated himself for that.

Miraculously after Lorelai left Jess finally hit his groove. He was just coming up on act IV when the doorbell rang. Another unreasonable flash of rage went through him. He had finally settled into studying and someone was disturbing him. Knowing himself, once he was distracted it was going to be Hell to get back into it.

Jess went to the front door and opened it with a little too much force. "Yeah?" he asked.

Before him stood a pretty teenager with bright blue eyes and long brown hair. She wore a maid's uniform from the Independence Inn. Obviously Rory.

"Um...Lorelai said she had a few things for me to pick up."

Jess stared her up and down, inspecting her. She really was pretty, more than pretty, she was stunningly beautiful. In fact, she was exactly the kind of pretty that would never talk to him if she wasn't being forced to. Something inside of Jess told him to reject her before she could reject him. Jess forgot about his promise to his mother to be nice.

"Come in," Jess finally said.

Rory timidly followed him inside. "Is Lorelai home?"

"Out." A one-word answer. She didn't need to know the details of their lives. Besides, she was just cutting into his studying time. He had wasted enough time today already.

"What's your name again? It starts with a J, right?" Rory asked, making with the small-talk.

"Jess," he said. He couldn't help the second bout of anger he suddenly felt. "Did my mom talk about me?"

"N—no. She just said she had a son."

"That means she talked about me."

"I—I guess."

As she stuttered Jess began to regret his tone. He didn't mean to scare the poor thing, he just wanted to finish the interaction as quickly as possible. He prayed she didn't break into tears. He had a terrible shoulder to cry on. Besides, it was stupid to get so upset about Lorelai. Of course she talked about him, he was her son. That's what mothers do.

"She said the stuff's in her room," Jess said, trying to move things along.

"Why isn't she home?" Rory asked as she followed Jess upstairs.

Jess shrugged. "Something about Sookie."

He brought Rory into Lorelai's room. There was a basket of neatly folded clothes and a few other miscellaneous objects on the bed. Jess picked up the basket and shoved it into Rory's hands. "Here." He walked out of the room.

Jess didn't even walk her to the door. He just went back to his room and let her find her own way out. Damn, he was a jerk, and he knew as soon as Rory told Lorelai about the interaction he was going to get an earful. He couldn't help himself, though. Everyone hated him so what was the point of trying to be nice? He started his study session back up.

* * *

Wednesday was just like Tuesday. And so was Thursday. Jess struggled to take notes in class, and then spent hours at home attempting to study, though honestly most of that studying time involved working on his sleight of hand and practicing a new card trick.

On Thursday evening, around six, Lorelai called the house, telling Jess to meet her at Luke's for dinner so he packed up his books and headed there. There wasn't a second to spare, he needed to study through dinner. Jess scouted a quiet table by the window and overtook it with his notes while he waited for his mother.

Luke walked by to take his order and looked down at the mess of papers shuffled haphazardly across the table. "How am I supposed to put a plate down?" Luke asked.

Jess didn't take his eyes off the table as he wrote down a note he wanted to add to his essay. "I'll find a spot."

"This school's really giving you a run for your money, huh?"

Jess crossed out his note. His teacher didn't care if he recited facts about what happened in a play, he expected an analysis comparing and contrasting the plays. "Yep, private school will do that."

He opened his backpack and fished out his copy of  _Taming of the Shrew_. There was in this moment in that play that reminded him of another in Much Ado About Nothing…but maybe he was grasping at straws. Jess threw his book across the table. It landed onto a mess of his papers.

Luke sat down across from Jess. "Anything I can do to help?" he asked.

"I don't think your degree in Flipping Burgers from the University of Trade Schools is going to be much help."

Luke's smile dropped off his face. That was too mean and Jess knew it. He had tremendous respect for Luke. Why would he ever say something like that?

Luke stood up.

"Sorry," Jess muttered under his breath.

Luke didn't sit back down. He stayed standing by the table, making Jess feel uncomfortable with the size and power dynamic. Jess peeked a glance up at the older man, trying to figure out if he was pissed, but Luke looked more sympathetic. His eyes studied Jess, looking him up and down. Jess looked away. Things would have been easier if Luke was just pissed.

He didn't always use to feel weird by how much Luke seemed to care for him. When he first met Luke five years ago Jess was intimidated by the man. Luke was so large and burly and looked like he could easily beat anyone up. He took a big interest in Lorelai and Jess resented how much she seemed to like him back. He'd heard stories at school about kids getting stepparents and then new little siblings and then getting all but forgotten by their parents. Jess didn't want that. He had already lost Mia, who had recently moved to Santa Barbara, and Chris was rarely around. He couldn't lose Lorelai too.

Then Chris finally left for good and moved to California. Chris hadn't really been around much during Jess's childhood, but at least he had been close by. Before there was always the idea that if they really needed him he could come by. Not anymore.

That's when Jess realized Luke wasn't there to take his mother away, but to replace his absentee father. Right at the point when Jess had been abandoned by his own flesh and blood, Luke, someone who had no reason to care, reached out to Jess and doted on him like Chris had never done. Jess had never played a sport so Luke taught him how to play baseball and convinced Lorelai to sign Jess up for Little League. Jess wasn't very good, but it was fun, and it was where Jess met Dave, who was also terrible enough to usually get stuck on the bench. Luke did other things for Jess too. He took Jess fishing and camping on the occasional weekend. He taught him to work with tools. He did all the things Chris never even offered.

Then Jess got older. He got angrier about Chris's abandonment and guilty for taking up all of Luke's time. It'd been a while since the last time Jess and Luke hung out.

Jess tapped his pencil on the table and waited for a reaction from Luke. Why wasn't Luke telling him off already? Maybe he was just going to drop it and walk away. Jess wasn't worth the effort of a confrontation, right?

"You're not okay?" Luke asked.

No such luck.

"I'm just..." Jess looked around as he tried to grasp at the word. Frustrated? Overwhelmed? Never going to catch up? He looked back up at the man. "I don't think you're stupid, you know that, right? I know it takes a lot of brains to run your own business."

"It's no…" Luke picked one of the texts off the table and read the title out loud, "… _Analysis of Shakespeare_. Good luck with that."

"You know anything about Shakespeare?" Jess asked.

Luke shook his head.

"You're a smart kid. Half the stuff you talk about goes over my head. More than half. And I always see your head in a book."

Jess frowned. He wished he had that type of confidence in himself. "I hope so," he said.

"Your mom wouldn't have sent you there if she didn't know you could do it."

Jess sighed. Living up to her expectations was another issue. He almost mentioned that to Luke, but he couldn't bring himself to open up that much. Would Luke care? Probably, and that's why he couldn't talk to him about it. Luke shouldn't have to deal with Jess's struggles.

There was a long pregnant pause as Jess kept quiet. Finally Luke broke it. "You want me to put in an order for you?"

Back to business. Good. It was easier that way. Emotions and bonding just made things messy.

"I'll wait for mom," he muttered and opened up another book.

Luke walked away.

Jess scribbled out another note. Comparing the downfall of Julius Caesar to the downfall of Macbeth was trite and obvious. Jess tapped his pencil again. An apple pie suddenly appeared in front of him. Jess looked up. Luke had set it down.

"Old study tip. Pie helps concentration."

Jess didn't believe that, but his rumbling stomach wasn't about to argue. He picked up his fork and had a huge bite. The flakey crust broke apart, sprinkling his shirt and notes with crumbs, but he didn't care. It tasted so good. Finally, Jess pushed aside some of his books and let himself just enjoy his pre-dinner dessert. Luke always knew what was best for him.

* * *

Lorelai finally arrived at the diner. She had gotten helped up at the inn due to a towel shortage crisis, but that was all solved now and she needed Luke's freshest cup of coffee to soothe her headache. Luke was wiping down a table by the door when she arrived, while Jess sat at a table that overflowed with books and papers. He munched away at a slice of pie as he read one of his textbooks.

"He's eating pie? Did he even have dinner?"

Luke shrugged. "You raised him. I just serve."

Lorelai frowned. She did raise him and raised him on an all junk food diet too, but it never really seemed to take. Jess wasn't exactly Euell Gibbons, but he had never seemed to take a liking to her eating habits before. Eating pie before dinner was something  _she'd_  do, not Jess.

Lorelai went over to Jess's table, but couldn't find a way to sit there and eat. Luckily there was an empty table to them. She slid it over next to his table and sat down.

"Seriously?" Luke shouted across the room. He always hated when she rearranged the diner furniture, but what was the big deal? There wasn't a big dinner rush going on right now.

Lorelai ignored him. "Lot of homework, huh?"

"It would appear so," Jess said.

"You want something to eat—other than pie, that is?"

"Burger, I guess."

"Fries?"

"Sure."

"Coffee?"

"Coke." Jess didn't pry his eyes away from his books once during the conversation.

Lorelai had a feeling dinner was going to be a lot more of that tonight. She couldn't really give Jess grief, though, she knew how stress he'd been all week about this paper. He'd even been working hard on it all week, instead of procrastinating until the last minute like he usually did. She was pretty proud of that. She just wished he hadn't been so closed-off and aggressive with her every time she came near him. Jess didn't deal with stress in healthy ways. He either shut you out or screamed at you.

Lorelai walked over to the counter and put their order in. "Two burgers with everything, a coffee, a coke, a large fry, and another apple pie—pie served first."

"So now you don't have a problem with dessert first?" Luke asked.

"I'm not going to let my kid out-junk-food me." Lorelai was the junk-food champion, after all, and she would not be dethroned so easily by an armature like Jess.

Lorelai turned to walk away but Luke told her to wait. He handed the order to Cesar than leaned over the counter and asked in a low voice, "Is he okay?"

Lorelai snuck a peek back at Jess. His nose was buried into another book. Jess had always been an avid reader, but this was more intense than usual. "Why? Did something happen?"

He'd been giving her an attitude all week and she hoped he hadn't given one to Luke too.

Luke seemed hesitant to respond. Finally, he said, "He was just a little snippy. He apologized right after. Said he was stressed over school. Everything okay at the new school?"

It felt like Luke was holding back something else, but Lorelai let it go. "Chilton is…intense, I guess. I know I should've expected this, that's what private schools are like after all, but he's just so smart that I kind of just figured it'd be more of the same. I've never seen him stressed over school before."

"He's a smart kid. Everything has always come easy to him. I'm sure he'll figure this out too. It's only his first week, after all."

Right, that's what she was telling herself too.

Luke reached out and squeezed Lorelai's hand. She looked over at him and smiled. Luke always knew the right thing to do to comfort her. She squeezed the hand back.

"He won't talk to me about this. I tried to help him with his work the other night and he just screamed at me. He's been wound so tightly all week. I've been walking on eggshells at home. It's driving me crazy. You know how I don't like to watch what I say."

"That's true."

"Hey, I insulted me. No need for you to add on."

"Sorry."

Lorelai let out a huge sigh. She needed help, and though Luke already helped her with Jess more than his fair share, she needed more. "Could you just…I don't know, look out for him, I guess? He likes you more than me. He'll talk to you about what's going on with him."

"Don't say that. Jess loves you. He's just a teenager. They never say the words."

"I know he 'loves' me like all kids 'love' their parents, but he also can't stand me like all teenagers can't stand their parents. He likes you though. He actually talks to you. Could you just…keep me in the loop? Let me know if something is bothering him that I can help with. I just feel so helpless right now, standing on the sidelines."

"Of course," Luke said. "Don't I already always do that?"

"I guess I just needed the reassurance," Cesar called out from the kitchen that the order was ready and Luke started to bring it over to the table. She sat back down with Jess, her worries barely alleviated.

* * *

Jess pulled an all-nighter on Thursday night. Back when he attended Stars Hollow High he occasionally had to pull an all-nighter after a bout of procrastination, but he'd never had to pull one  _after_  genuinely putting in effort all week. Or at least trying to put in effort. With all the hours of studying Jess had put in during the past week, he had spent even more time getting distracted over nonsense. Though he had read every Shakespeare play synopsis he could get his hands on, and a handful of the actual scripts, he had spent even more time reorganizing his CD collection, bookshelf and closet. Hell, his room was clean for the first time in years, but sitting down to write this Goddamn paper was impossible.

Tonight was the last possible night to finish. He had a pile of papers filled with his notes, and a few attempts at paragraphs on Microsoft Word, but nothing concrete. It was going to be a long night.

Just like she had been doing all week Lorelai voiced her concerns about his over studying before she went to bed for the night. It caused another argument and ended with Jess locking himself in his room to finish his work while she went to bed. At around midnight he realized how many more hours of work were ahead of him and went to the kitchen to brew a pot of coffee. Then he brewed a second batch a few hours later.

By then his paper was nearly done, all the information was there, it just wasn't written very coherently, and his citations were a mess. He really needed to learn to cite as he wrote instead of saving it all for the end.

He must have been louder than he thought because Lorelai came downstairs while the pot was still filling. Lorelai rubbed her eyes and squinted at the coffee pot while Jess sat at the kitchen table. He had moved into the kitchen around the time he brewed the first pot. His laptop was open but pushed aside and he was reading through a freshly printed version of his second draft, crossing out huge sections of it with one of Lorelai's colorful pink pens, the one with a fluffy, feather at the end. A normal red pen would have been preferable, but Jess had to work with what they had.

"As much as I'm loving the confirmation that you are in fact my kid, what with the coffee at," she glanced over at the clock, "three in the morning?! Oh my God, Jess, get to bed."

"In a minute," Jess said, not actually listening to her. He circled a paragraph and drew arrows to another part of the paper.

"Jess," Lorelai said and snapped her fingers in front of his face.

Jess came out of his trance and stared up at Lorelai. "What?!" he growled. What did she possibly want? Couldn't she see how stressed he was?

"It's three in the morning," she repeated.

"So?"

"So it's three in the morning. You're supposed to be up in four hours and instead you're making coffee."

"This is not the first time you've caught me doing an all-nighter."

"It's the first time I've caught you doing an all-nighter three nights in a row."

"I haven't pulled three all-nighters in a row."

"Yeah? When did you go to bed last night? Because I know I've gone to bed before you all week. I assumed you were staying up a little late, not brewing coffee at three in the freaking morning."

"I didn't brew coffee at three in the morning last night…I went to bed at three."

"That's still too late."

He knew she was right. Jess hadn't gotten a single full night of sleep all week. The perpetual state of exhaustion these long hours were causing certainly wasn't helping his concentration either.

"I just need to do a couple more drafts," Jess said.

"A couple?!"

"You know how I work. I write, then completely rewrite. The first draft is always shit."

"Can I?" Lorelai reached for his paper. Jess pulled it away.

"No, it's terrible. It doesn't make any sense, there's no flow, it's a total mess."

Lorelai's brows wrinkled. "You're always your harshest critic."

"What do you know about writing? You dropped out of high school!" Jess snapped. As soon as the words tumbled out of his mouth he realized how horrible of a thing that was to say. And twice in one day, first to Luke and now to Lorelai, just because they were trying to help. He didn't even know why he was attacking people over their education. Intelligence doesn't require education. Bill Gates dropped out of high school, for Christ's sake. "I didn't mean—"

"I dropped out of high school because I was pregnant!" Lorelai snapped.

"I know."

"With you, thank you very much."

Jess felt a pit in his stomach. He always knew she secretly hated him for ruining her life. "I didn't ask to be born," he said, gripping his pen so hard his knuckles turned white. "I didn't ask for you to keep me."

Lorelai gasped. "Jess!" Lorelai's voice cracked. "You don't actually think like that, do you? That I didn't want you? Jess look at me."

Jess looked up. Lorelai had started to cry. Why did he always make his mother cry?

Lorelai reached across the table and squeezed Jess's free hand. "There was never a moment I felt any regret. There was a moment of 'Oh shit, my parents are going to kill me' but no regret. I knew from the moment the strip turned pink that you were mine and how much I was going to love you. I never even considered any other options."

Jess doubted that very much. No teenager gets pregnant and doesn't consider abortion or adoption. Lorelai just didn't have the guts to go through with those better alternatives. She would have been much happier if she had.

"You were supposed to go to Vassar."

"I didn't want to go to Vassar, Jess. Maybe a state school, but not some private all-girls school—could you imagine me at an all-girl school?"

"Vassar's co-ed."

"It wasn't back then."

"Pretty sure it was, actually."

"That's not the point! Jess, could you just listen to me? That's not the life I wanted. That was the life my parents wanted for me. I really don't know what I wanted, but I know I didn't want that. But with you, the instant I realized I was pregnant—once I got over the shock of how fat I was going to get—I knew for the first time in my life what I wanted. I wanted you, Jess. Don't think for a second that you ruined my life, because you made my life worth it."

It was a good speech. Too bad Jess didn't buy it. She could pretend all she wanted that she didn't resent him, but Jess knew the truth. She didn't want him. She had only convinced herself that she did in order to shield herself from the guilt over destroying her own life.

Apparently Lorelai couldn't tell what Jess was thinking, because she went back to addressing Jess's original comment without any more reassurance about loving him. "Besides, I think I've done pretty well for us, all things considered. I have my GED. I'm in college—community college, sure, but still, college. I'm not a clueless idiot, Jess. Heck, I can probably help with school better than any of your peers' parents. I have to write papers just as often as you do."

"I know," Jess said. "I shouldn't have brought up dropping out. I know you didn't have a choice in it. I don't know why I said it."

"I'm still not hearing an I'm sorry."

"I am. Sorry, that is. I don't think before I speak."

"I'm getting a little sick of that excuse every time you decide to act like a jerk."

Jess looked down at his paper. "I've still got edits to do."

Lorelai sighed. "Fine, one more draft—no coffee—then bed. And don't think this discussion about your behavior is over. I'm cutting you a little slack here because I know you're stressed about finishing up this paper, but we're going to talk about this more tomorrow, after school. Get it?"

"Got it."

"Good…is there anything I can do to help?"

Jess took a moment to respond. He hadn't given his mother half the credit she deserved. She was right, she was a college student. She probably could have helped him with this paper days ago. "Could you help me with the citations?"

Lorelai frowned. "I hate citations."

"Me too, that's why I always wait until the end and it's the worst. I've got the in-text citations, with the author and page number, but I need all the other info for the works cited page."

"MLA?"

Jess nodded.

"Fine, hand me the books and your laptop. I'll type them up for you."

Jess turned the laptop over to Lorelai and handed her each of the books. While she formatted the citations he finished editing his latest draft. When he took the laptop back from Lorelai to update the document he took a moment to circle back to the discussion about his behavior. "I really am sorry," he said. "I'm really not trying to be a jerk…I said something pretty terrible to Luke today too."

Lorelai frowned. "He said you got snippy with him, but that you apologized. He's really concerned about you, just like I am."

That only made Jess feel more guilty. "I shouldn't have taken it out on Luke. I shouldn't bother him at all with my problems."

Lorelai shook her head. "Hey now, that's not what I said. Luke adores you. I know he's been busy lately and hasn't had time for camping—"

"I told him I didn't want to go camping anymore," Jess said.

"What?"

Jess shrugged.

"But I thought you liked going camping with him."

Jess did like camping with Luke. Not that sleeping on the damp, cold ground was his definition of fun, but he liked spending time with Luke. Luke would teach Jess new things, like how to build a fire and cast a fishing line. The problem was Jess also hated wasting Luke's time. "He doesn't want to go camping with me, Mom. He's just trying to be nice."

"Trust me Jess, if he was just being nice he wouldn't invite someone who uses as much Axe as you do to sleep in the same tent."

"I don't use that much Axe."

"Every morning when I walk into the downstairs bathroom it feels like I'm being teargassed."

"Well that's because I have to get the smell of your scented candles off of me!"

Lorelai rolled her eyes. "Back to my point, Jess, Luke likes you. He likes spending time with you. Please don't think you're a burden to him. You're not." Lorelai reached over the table and squeezed Jess's hand once more. "I really hate that you feel this way about yourself. I know you feel like a burden a lot, and I wish you didn't. I'm serious when I say don't regret getting pregnant for a moment. The circumstances, sure, but not you. You need to stop thinking like that. You're the best thing that has ever happened to me, kiddo."

There was a lump in Jess's throat. She was back to reassuring him that he was loved. Why was it so hard for him to just believe her?

"I have to finish typing up these rewrites," Jess said, changing the topic again.

"Oh, okay," Lorelai said, taken aback. "Well, I'll let you get to it."

Jess began typing up the new draft, trying to focus on the words instead of his emotions. Lorelai was constantly telling him how much she loved him and wanted him and had no regrets. With the constant reassurance there was no reason for Jess to doubt her words. So why did he? Was what wrong with him that he couldn't just believe her?

He really did try to believe her, but a voice in the back of his head was louder. It kept telling him that she was lying. All mothers say they love their children unconditionally, but that couldn't possibly be true. It was a statistical impossibility. Some mothers had to hate their children, especially the ones who had no choice in the matter of parenthood. There was just no way Lorelai really loved him. He wasn't lovable. Why else did everyone else always leave?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, I really tried to improve the SPaG in this chapter. I've started using a text reader again to pick up on the mistakes my brain doesn't notice. My God had I missed a lot of things! Let me know if the SPaG is any better, as well as any other concrit or reviews you'd like to give me. I'm also going to go through the earlier chapters with a text reader and tighten up their SPaG too.
> 
> And lastly, I really have to thank Stellaluna.3 from FFN. She has been a wealth of help with characterization, and specifically nailing Jess's procrastination methods. Thank you so much!


	5. Dinner Bells and a Wedding Too

After their heart to heart, Jess tried insisting on mocking up  _another_  draft, but Lorelai would hear none of it. She practically dragged him by the shirt collar into his room and forced him onto his bed. With Jess sitting on the bed, his arms crossed and eyes glaring, Lorelai picked his blankets up and pulled them over his legs.

"Lie down," she said, using her babytalk voice. She leaned over for a kiss on his forehead but Jess dodged it by leaning back in the bed and pulling the covers over his head.

Lorelai continued with a thorough tuck in, straightening out the rest of the blankets and laying his comforter on top. When she was done she pulled the first blanket away from his head.

"See, if I didn't love you would I go through all this trouble to make sure you were comfy and tucked in?" she asked in a normal voice this time.

"Okay, I no longer feel unwanted," Jess said. "I feel smothered and prefer how it was before. Will you go away now?"

Lorelai just smiled. She tried for another kiss, but Jess pulled his covers over his head again. With a giggle, she got off the bed and left the room.

Jess pulled his cover down to his chest. Why had he let things get so deep with Lorelai? Why had he admitted that he thought she didn't love him and that Luke didn't want to spend time with him? And why did she try so hard to change his feelings?

It didn't take long to drift off to sleep. He was exhausted and when the alarm blared a few hours later it was too soon. He was forced awake from a nightmare about missing a test. As his heartbeat slowed down he reminded himself that there was no test to miss. Just his paper. He just needed to finish his damn paper.

Jess rushed out of bed and ran back to the kitchen table. Why had he let Lorelai convince him to go to bed before he was satisfied with his edits? He would never finish now. Or so he thought.

When Jess printed out a copy of the most recent draft and started his edits he realized it wasn't actually that bad. He had to fix a couple of sentences, but mostly he was pretty proud of his work. All his efforts had paid off. Jess could do this. He could do Chilton.

Lorelai came downstairs just as Jess was adding in his last few corrections.

"Oh my God, please tell me that after I finally got you into bed you didn't just immediately get back up. Please tell me you've slept."

"Huh?" Jess said. "Oh no, just woke up. Alarm went off."

"And you immediately started homework again? Jess, you're paper is fine. Get dressed. We're not going to have time for Luke's."

Jess handed his laptop to Lorelai and ran back into his room. "Hit print for me," he said as he closed the door. He quickly stripped off yesterday's clothes—he never got around to putting his pajamas on, and changed into his Chilton uniform. He left the tie draped around his neck, untied. He never tied it until he arrived at school. He briefly glanced at the mirror and tried to fix his floppy curls that nearly covered his eyes, but he didn't have time for his usual hair care routine. Jess grabbed his paper off the printer and went back into the kitchen.

"See, dressed and we've still got time for Luke's."

Lorelai stared at him.

"What?"

"I didn't know your hair could do that."

"Do what?"

"Follow the rules of gravity."

"Shut up." Jess picked up his backpack. After a quick breakfast at Luke's and a long bus ride to Hartford Jess reached Chilton. He proudly handed in his paper to Mr. Medina. Neither Paris's sneers nor Tristan's annoyances could ruin his mood. His good mood continued well into the afternoon. Not even being forced to attend his second Friday Night Dinner could ruin his day.

On the way to dinner, Lorelai brought last night's discussion back up. Jess was sitting in the passenger seat reading  _Neuromancer_  while their shared copy of  _Combat Rock_  blared through the tape player.

Lorelai turned the volume down just as "Rock the Casbah" was reaching the chorus.

"Jess, I'm concerned about these feelings you have."

"Feelings?" Jess asked. "What feelings? I don't do emotions, Mom."

"I know you like to pretend to be a tough guy, but you don't fool me. And I'm not oblivious. I know you've felt like this for a while. Maybe since your dad moved to California? You know that had nothing to do with you, right?"

Jess put his book down. He really didn't want to talk about this. He didn't want to devote any brain power to thinking about that deadbeat.

"And it doesn't matter what Chris has or hasn't done, anyway, because I'm not him. Haven't I always been here and supported you?"

"I know!" Jess said, way too angry. He didn't mean for his words to come out so harsh, but he really didn't want to have this conversation again. "Of course I know. I know that logically the only explanation for why you put up with me and everything I do is that you love me. I just don't get why. And I know that's stupid and I know you're just going to sit there and tell me how I shouldn't think like that but I can't help it. That's just how my brain is wired. So can we drop it, because you aren't going to fix me in the next twenty minutes before we get to Hartford, and I'd rather not have a fight before we get to Grandma and Grandpa's."

Lorelai was silent for the next minute or so. Jess thought maybe she really had dropped it, but then she finally spoke up. "I know we won't fix this in one car ride, but I'm not going to drop it. You're loved. By me, Luke, Sookie. So many people care about you, and I'm not going to stop reminding you of that fact. We don't have to talk any more about this tonight, but this isn't over." She smirked. "I will wear you down. I'm good at that."

"Oh, I know," Jess said. If anyone was stubborn enough to get through to Jess it was her. "I'm sorry I've been such a jerk this past week."

"Let's just pretend this past week never happened, okay? I know you were stressed over the transfer. Clean slate this week. Just try to pretend everything is okay in front of your grandparents. We don't need them to know about our drama."

"Trust me, the last thing I want is more of their involvement." Jess went back to reading his book.

When they arrived at the Gilmore Manor Lorelai rang the doorbell. Emily answered. She stood in the doorway and stared them both up and down. "Lorelai. Jess," she said curtly. She stepped aside to let them in.

"Wow," Lorelai whispered to Jess as they took off their coats and handed them to the maid. The maid was a different woman than last week. "I thought I was the only one she gave that look to."

Apparently, Jess had done something to piss Emily off too.

"Jess, will you meet with me for a moment in your grandfather's study?"

Jess looked back at his mother for help.

"What about drinks, Mom?" Lorelai asked.

"Drink cart is in the parlor, Lorelai. If I recall correctly from past holiday parties, you're quite intimately familiar with it. Of course, if you've suddenly forgotten how to make a martini than you can always ask your father."

Lorelai mouthed an  _I'm sorry_  to Jess as Emily walked Jess off in the other direction of the living room. At the end of the hallway was the aforementioned study. Jess had probably spent more time in that study than anywhere else in the house. He often used it to hide from the other guests at his grandparent's holiday parties. He loved looking over the book collection every Christmas. With Emily there too, though, the room didn't feel nearly as inviting.

Emily walked behind Richard's desk and told Jess to take a seat in front of it. Jess sat, leaning back in his chair, and frowned. What the Hell was this?

"I wanted to talk to you about your behavior on Monday, during your meeting with Hanlin. I don't know what your mother has taught you about the proper decorum of a gentleman, but the way you acted was unacceptable."

Great, a lecture. "I was—"

"I'm not done speaking. By arriving late you wasted my time, the school's time and especially Hanlin's time. And then you were extremely rude to both me and him. He told me how you acted after I left. This can't ever happen again. Hanlin is a family friend and your Headmaster. You'll need him for college recommendations, not to mention that Gilmores are respectful."

Emily stopped speaking. Apparently, it was his turn now. "Can we get back to drinks now?" he asked.

Emily glared. "You don't have anything to say for yourself?"

"What do you want me to say?"

"An apology would be nice, to start!" she snapped. "And a promise that you'll behave better in the future."

"Fine. Sorry. I'll behave better in the future," Jess said in a monotone voice that was laced with insincerity. "Can I go now?"

Emily shook her head. "Your mother has ruined you." She stormed out of the room.

Jess's stomach dropped. Every time he acted up, especially in front of his grandparents, it reflected back at Lorelai. He shouldn't have been so rude. He should have just played along with Emily and pretended he was going to behave for now on. Why did he have to antagonize her?

Jess followed Emily into the living room and joined his mother on one of the couches. Emily was already at the drink cart, loading her martini up to the brim. She came back to the couches and thrust a club soda at Jess, then sat on the adjacent couch where Richard sat reading a newspaper.

Lorelai gave Jess an inquisitive look, but it wasn't like Jess could explain what just happened with Emily staring daggers at him. Besides, he wasn't exactly dying to let his mother know how disrespectful he just was.

"So Jess," Richard said without lowering his newspaper. "How was your first week at Chilton?"

"It was school," was all he said.

Emily huffed. "Really? That's all you have to say? You're attending one of the finest secondary academic institutions in the country. You can't be a little more descriptive?"

"Really high ceilings." Another dismissive answer. He knew he was still being an ass and should try to smooth things over, but he couldn't help himself. He didn't want to talk about school. He was trying to de-stress, not get worked up again.

Richard's head poked out of his newspaper and he held a gaze with Jess for a few moments. There was a small smirk on his lips as Emily huffed.

"Fine, don't tell me," Emily said.

Jess got the feeling that his grandparents had very polarizing personalities. Richard with his quiet stoicism and Emily with the over-indulgent pestering. At that moment Jess realized that despite the distance and little contact over the years, he and his mother were just more sarcastic versions of Richard and Emily. The thought almost made him shudder.

Emily was now just staring at the wall, not talking. Very immature, and very much like Lorelai when she didn't get her way.

Lorelai looked at her son, making direct eye contact with him. She was giving him that "stop being a jerk" look that she had to use about once a day. Lorelai had begged Jess to make an effort with his grandparents. Short, nondescript answers wasn't an effort. Besides, indulging his grandmother with a little small talk wouldn't kill him.

Jess sighed. "We've read some Shakespeare plays."

Emily turned, her expression slightly softened. She looked like an abused animal, one who still desired affection but was scared of getting hit again. "Really? Which ones?"

Jess nearly groaned. More questions? "Pretty much all of them. Had to write a paper. It mostly focused on  _A Midsummer Dream, Hamlet, Julius Caesar_ -"

Richard lowered his newspaper again and spoke.

_"Cowards die many times before their deaths; The valiant never taste of death but once. Of all the wonders that I yet have heard, it seems to me most strange that men should fear; Seeing that death, a necessary end, will come when it will come."_

An awed silence hung around the room. As much as Jess never wanted to see or hear Shakespeare again he had to admit pulling random quotes from the plays out of thin air like that was kind of impressive, especially since Jess had thought Richard hadn't been paying attention at all.

Emily's gaze was lovingly turned on Richard. She wasn't glaring at anyone anymore but watching in awe. It was a look Jess had never seen on his grandmother before. He didn't know she was capable of warmth.

"We used to take Lorelai to Shakespeare productions all the time when she was little," Richard said.

"You did?" Lorelai asked.

"Oh yes," Emily said. She was still smiling, her hands neatly folded in her lap. "I remember you once came into the dining room declaring Juliet was stupid and you'd never kill yourself over a stupid boy." Emily and Richard laughed.

Lorelai shrugged and turned to Jess whispering, "Well I still agree."

"I think my favorite is Macbeth," Emily said.

Lorelai gasped.

"What's wrong?" Emily asked.

"You're not supposed to say its name?!" Lorelai pointed her index finger at her mother's face.

"What name?" Emily asked

Lorelai lowered her hand and gave Emily a pointed look.

"Macbeth?" Jess asked, joining in the conversation against his better judgment.

Lorelai gasped again and pointed her finger at Jess.

"What?" Jess asked, sincerely wondering if his mother had truly lost it.

"What in Heaven's Earth has gotten into you?" Emily asked. Her face had turned back into a scowl. "Are you having an episode?"

"It's a cursed play!" Lorelai said, gesturing madly into the air.

Oh, that's what she was talking about. The Scottish Curse. Theater superstition believed that if you said the name Macbeth inside a theater it would cause disaster. Superstitious actors referred to the play as the Scottish Play, referencing the setting. According to theater legend, the witch scenes included a real spell that casts the curse. It was about as silly as telling someone to "break a leg".

"It's not like Candlejack," Jess said. "You're allowed to say it, just not in a theater."

"Nuh-uh!" Lorelai said, acting ever petulant.

"Yeah-huh," Jess childishly argued back.

"No."

"We literally just discussed this in class."

Lorelai gasped again. Jess buried his head into his hands. Lorelai was about to say something ridiculous again.

"Did your teacher say it?" she asked.

"Say what?" Jess mumbled through his hands.

"The name."

Jess lifted his head with a smirk on his lips. If Lorelai was going to act stupid, then he might as well have fun baiting her. "What name?"

"You know?" Lorelai said with an accusatory tone.

"No mother. Could you please be more specific?"

"No! You will not get me to say it."

"Oh stop this!" Emily yelled. "I can't believe this. This is the most words Jess has said all evening and it's fighting about the Macbeth curse."

Lorelai gasped again and pointed her finger at Emily. "You said it again!"

"Oh, Goddamn it!" Emily said and stood up. "Mira, get dinner ready! We're eating now."

* * *

 

Dinner was less dramatic than drinks. Lorelai and Jess didn't get into another verbal spat and Emily stopped pouting. As they finished, their plates were taken away and replaced with dessert.

Emily asked Lorelai about her inn. She didn't inquire much and immediately went back to interrogating Jess about school.

"Okay, done with me now," Lorelai said. She looked over at Jess as if to say  _I told you they hate me_. You're the golden child. Jess thought it was freaky that he could sometimes almost read his mother's mind. He was a little too in sync with her tonight.

"I'm sorry, is there more?" Emily asked, placating smile plastered on her face.

"No, no, go on and pry into Jess's personal life. He loves it." Lorelai smiled at her son, who returned a glare.

Was this really how they were going to handle Emily? By shifting focus? Fine, two could play at that game. "The inn is hosting a double wedding this weekend," Jess said. There, focus back on Lorelai.

Lorelai gasped. Dramatic as always. "Et tu, Brute?"

"Well isn't that nice," Emily said, clearly uninterested. Jess's gambit was failing.

"Inn must be making good business," Richard said, staring at his plate.

"We are," Lorelai said. Her tone was accusatory. "I'm really proud of the work I'm doing."

"Mom just hired a new maid," Jess added, continuing to try to keep the conversation on Lorelai instead of himself.

 _Stop_ , Lorelai mouthed at Jess, but it was too late. Sure, he had finally succeeded in dodging their attention, but at what cost? The last person he should bring up in front of his grandparents was the girl living in a remarkably similar situation to the one Lorelai was in fifteen years ago.

"Oh, anything special about this maid?" Emily asked before sipping her wine glass.

"Well I haven't fired her yet," Lorelai said under her breath.

Jess was taking a sip of his water when Lorelai said that and nearly did a spit take. Instead, it just went down the wrong pipe and he tried to stifle a coughing fit. Did Lorelai really just point out Emily's revolving door of maids.

"Are you okay?" Emily asked, the attention now back on Jess. Great.

Jess cleared his through and took another sip. He nodded.

Emily's eyes landed back on Lorelai. "Now what was it you just said?"

Of course, not even a choking grandson could make Emily ignore an insult to her house managing skills.

"Nothing mother."

"No, you said something. Apparently, something funny enough to make your son lose control of his trachea. Mind informing the rest of the family?"

This was all Jess's fault. He just had to draw Emily's attention onto Lorelai because he couldn't stand to be in the spotlight for two minutes. Why did he have to be such a coward and a jerk?

"I just said that she's young, Mom," Lorelai said. "Nothing funny…girl reminds me of, well, me actually."

Emily's nose ruffled.

"What?" Lorelai asked.

"Nothing."

Lorelai bit her lip. The room felt 10 degrees colder. Jess shook her head.  _Don't do it_ , Mom, Jess thought,  _don't engage in a fight_.

"Oh, you clearly want to say something," Lorelai said. Dammit, she was engaging. This was going to be last week all over again.

Emily put her wine glass down and sat up straighter, which seemed impossible because she already had impeccable posture. "I just hope she's not too much like you."

"What's that supposed to mean?"

The tension in the room was rising as the seconds ticked by. Jess tried to think of how he could stop this upcoming argument but nothing came to mind. He just sat back and watched as the two women sparred verbally.

"I don't know, Lorelai. Do you remember the circumstances that you were in when you—no, I'm not going to say it."

"Became a maid? You can say it. That was my job."

Emily crinkled her nose and looked away.

"There's no shame in that. I was a maid. I'm proud of the fact that I was a maid and worked my way up to manager. God, haven't we already have this fight?"

"Yes, and I think we should stop."

Lorelai didn't stop. "Rory's a good kid who's fallen on hard times."

"So what? You think you're some sort of savior?" Emily pointed her index finger at Lorelai. "What does  _her_  mother think of you?"

Lorelai opened her mouth then closed it. Instead, she got up and stormed out of the room, toward the stairs. Emily also stood up and left, her toward the kitchen.

Jess was left alone with his grandfather. Great, instead of being interrogated he was just going to be ignored. "Is this going to be a weekly occurrence?" Jess asked, trying to break the silence.

Richard chuckled. It sounded forced. Maybe he was regretting not being the one to get digs in this time, Jess thought.

Jess tapped his fork against the plate of cake. It was barely touched but he wasn't hungry anymore.

Richard wiped his mouth with his napkin and stood up. Jess sighed. Now he was going to be stuck here alone until Lorelai recomposed herself and they finally left.

Richard started to leave the dining room but then paused. "Would you like to join me in my study?" Richard asked.

Jess jumped at the chance. While Richard's company might not have been his first choice, sitting alone in his grandparent's dining room seemed even worse, especially considering the fact that he had left his book in the Jeep and Lorelai had the keys. He followed Richard to the study.

Richard sat at his desk. Jess awkwardly sat down in one of the leather chairs in front. He had flashbacks to the confrontation with his grandmother at the start of this evening. What argument was Richard planning? Was he going to imply Jess was an ungrateful, rude asshole too?

Richard opened the desk drawer. He riffled through it for a few moments.

"Ah, here it is," he said and pulled out a picture. He handed it to Jess.

The photo was of several men and a few ladies wearing togas. Jess raised an eyebrow. Richard leaned forward, over his desk and pointed at one of the men, a tall and stocky man.

"That's me," he said.

There was similarity in the facial structures but it was still a surprise to be looking at a picture of his grandfather so young, especially dressed in such garbs.

"Raging frat party?" Jess asked.

Richard laughed. "Julius Caesar—the play. I, of course, was the title character. Your grandfather isn't just a casual lover of the fine arts. He was a part of them."

Jess raised an eyebrow. Richard didn't exactly seem very important in the picture. He was standing to the side and in the back.

"Okay, I was the understudy. They cast me as a spear-carrier during the actual production. But had Jeremy fallen sick I would've shined!" Richard pumped his fist into the air.

Jess laughed. Maybe Richard wasn't all that terrible. Maybe there were hidden depths to him. Maybe if Lorelai could figure out a way to get along with her parents these Friday Night Dinners wouldn't be so bad. That was a lot of maybes, though.

* * *

 

Lorelai didn't know why the one place she ran off to was her old bedroom, but after her fight with her mother that's where she ended up. It looked exactly the same as the day she left fifteen years ago. Had anyone been inside it since? There was no dust so certainly the maids had kept cleaning it. What about her parents, had they come inside?

Lorelai walked over to the bed and sat on it. Across the other side of the room she saw her antique doll house. That dollhouse had been passed down through her mother's family from daughter to daughter for generations. Lorelai had always wanted a daughter to give it to. She walked over to it and slid her hand over the smooth surface of the exterior. Not all the memories in this house were so bad. At least not the ones in this room.

Her eyes landed on the balcony. Oh, the wild times she had there, like the time Chris snuck into the backyard and pelted rocks at her window. Chris was so foolish! He woke up the whole house drunkenly reciting the balcony scene from  _Romeo and Juliet_ , the most obvious and trite of all balcony jokes. Still, it was charming.

Lorelai opened the sliding window and stepped out on it. Wind blew through her hair. It was a night much like this, albeit a warm January day rather than a chilly September one, when she and Chris conceived Jess right around the spot where she was standing. Lorelai smiled to herself. What kind of idiot teenagers had sex on a balcony in the middle of January?

The bedroom door inside open. Lorelai jumped. She turned around as Jess entered the room.

"God, you almost gave me a freaking heart attack."

Why was she so jumpy all of a sudden? It had to be the room. This room made her feel like a teenager all over again.

Jess walked onto the balcony. Lorelai didn't point out the significance of what he was standing on. He didn't need that type of traumatic scarring.

"Grandpa said we can go home."

Lorelai's eyes pinched into a glare. "They're kicking us out?"

"No. They're releasing us of our weekly obligation. You don't want to be here, do you?"

Lorelai looked back at the lawn. "No."

"Then let's go." Jess went back inside.

"Why'd you start a fight?"

Jess paused for a second, but then he kept walking.

A flash of anger went through Lorelai. Jess can't just walk away when she's trying to speak with him. She followed him out of the room and grabbed his arm, stopping him in the hallway. "Don't walk awa—" she started yelling but then stopped. She took a deep breath. Not here. Not in her parent's house. She lowered her voice. "Get in the car."

"That's where I was going!" Jess snapped back. He turned on his heel and raced out of her grasp and down the hallway and stairs. Lorelai trailed behind. They picked their coats off the coat rack and left the house, Lorelai making sure to give the front door a good slam. Her parents damn well better know she was leaving and she was not happy about tonight's events.

Jess was already in the Jeep with the door shut by the time she reached it. She got in and sat beside him. She put the key in the ignition but didn't start the car.

"What, we aren't going home?" Jess asked. "Are we just going to sit here, freezing our asses off all night?"

"My parents don't need your help starting a fight," Lorelai said. "They have enough ammunition already."

Jess reached over the armrest and turned the key ignition. "At least put the heat on."

"I'm serious Jess. This isn't a joke."

Jess turned the heat dial up all the way, still ignoring her. The car had been sitting there for over three hours, so all it could do was blow cold air for now. Lorelai turned the car off. Jess glared at her.

"I didn't do anything," Jess yelled. "All I did was tell them about your inn and you and grandma went crazy."

"You don't give them any information. They're the enemy."

"They're your parents." Jess leaned back in his seat and brought his hands up to his mouth. He blew on them.

"And you know my history with them. Why would you do this?"

Jess put his hands in his coat pocket. He stared out the windshield.

"Jess!"

"What do you want from me?" he yelled. "I didn't do it on purpose. I wasn't sitting there, secretly putting my diabolical plan into place. Grandma was giving me the third degree so I put the attention back onto you. I didn't think it was going to turn ugly. Not  _that_  ugly."

"You couldn't think of any other way to distract her?"

"Hey, you're the one who agreed to these dinners. You're the one who let them back into your life. I was perfectly fine with attending Stars Hollow High. If you had such an issue with your parents you should've found a different way to pay for Chilton or you should've just kept me where I was."

Lorelai turned away from Jess and turned the key. Her face was hot. Just when she thought things were getting better with Jess everything had to unravel again. She thought after what happened last night she and Jess were finally starting to get along again. He had finally communicated his feelings to her and she was going to work on helping fix them.

Boy, was she wrong. All she was trying to do was help him better his life, and he was hurting her for it. Lorelai blinked back tears. She told herself she wouldn't let Jess see her cry. One escaped down her cheek, on the side that Jess could see. She didn't wipe, as to not bring attention to it. Jess didn't say anything. Hopefully, he hadn't noticed.

The drive back to Stars Hollow was silent.

* * *

 

The fight with Jess was stupid. She knew he wasn't  _trying_  to be a jerk last night; she just overreacted. He had a rough week and wanted to be left alone. It wasn't fair to blame him for trying to shift Emily's attention away from himself. That's just how Jess was. He hated attention in the best of circumstances. The poor kid had even thrown up during a class presentation on more than one occasion.

Lorelai tried to apologize to him in the morning, but he wasn't up and after the late hours he pulled all week he really needed his rest. She had to get to work, anyway. The double wedding was more of a disaster then she could have imagined and she needed to concentrate on that. She left him a note and hoped that would at least be a step in the right direction for resolving things.

The wedding, of course, was for two identical twins. Annoying identical twins who bickered when they weren't finishing each other's sentences. And the worse part was not only were they identical twins but that they were marrying another pair of identical twins. What a freak show!

The only person more stressed than Lorelai was their mother, but at least she could drink her way through this fiasco. Lorelai had to be professional and stay sober.

When Lorelai entered the main lobby, after doing the walkthrough of the back garden with the brides and their mother, she saw Rory.

"First big event!" Lorelai said, plastering on a fake smile. Can't let the subordinates see you sweat. "How are you holding it together?"

Rory wrung out her hands. "Okay," she mumbled. Clearly a lie.

"You get used to it," Lorelai also lied. She reached into her purse, fished out a bottle and tossed it to Rory, who fumbled with it in the air before catching it. "Advil also helps."

Rory smiled. "I think I'm good for now." She offered Lorelai the bottle back.

"I'm really sorry to have to do this," Lorelai said, "but you know that phrase it takes a village?"

Rory folded her hands toward her stomach, still holding the bottle. A wrinkle appeared on her forehead. "Isn't that about raising children?"

Lorelai smiled. "Well, these brides are kind of childish. They've asked for a personal assistant to wait on them hand-and-foot. And I'm sorry, Kid, you're at the bottom of the totem pole."

Rory's face went white. Slowly she lifted the bottle, unscrewed the cap and took out a pill. She popped it in her mouth. A bell boy was walking by, a water bottle slung in his hand at his waist. Lorelai grabbed it from him and handed it to Rory.

"It'll get better," Lorelai said.

"After I shoot my brains out?"

"Hey now, don't do that. Do you know how much blood stain removal cost?"

Rory sighed and went upstairs.

As soon as Rory was gone Jess entered the lobby from outside. As always his face was buried in a book. He almost walked into one of the bridesmaids on his way over to the main desk. Lorelai shouting across the lobby at him didn't get his attention. Was he ignoring her or was really that focused? Jess placed his book on the desk and kept reading.

Lorelai walked over to the main desk and closed his book. He flinched, and looked up at her with wide eyes. "Don't do that to me," he hissed.

"Do what?"

"Approach out of the shadows like you're in the League of Assassins."

Wow, he  _had_  been focusing that intently. On the one hand that was good, it means he wasn't holding a grudge about last night. But on the other, his inability to notice his surroundings was alarming. "I'm wearing heels."

"Are they made of cork?"

Lorelai frowned. She reached over and tried to squeeze his shoulder but he pulled away. He always pulls away. It didn't matter. No matter how many times he pulls away she'll always try again. She'll never stop trying to comfort her son.

"What's wrong?" Lorelai asked.

"You're the one who left a note."

He was referring to the sticky note Lorelai left on Jess's door this morning. It said for Jess to meet her at the inn, but she expected him hours ago. It was already past three in the afternoon. When she thought Jess had just ignored the note, or hadn't seen it, she was annoyed but not worried. But between this and hyper focusing on the book it was clear there was more going on.

"Did you just wake up?"

"It's Saturday." Jess's eyes immediately went back to the book.

"I know what day it is," Lorelai said. She snapped her fingers in front of his face. "Hey. Look at me when I talk."

Jess slammed the book shut.

"What do you want woman?"

"My office. Now," Lorelai said, and didn't give Jess a chance to obey the order. She grabbed him by the shirt collar and dragged him to the room behind the desk.

Lorelai's office was small, only twelve by ten feet. A small desk was in the back, which was covered in a backlog of paperwork. There was a spinning office chair behind it, and a wooden dining chair in front. Technically the room belonged to Mia but since she was rarely around she let Lorelai and the night manager, Tobin, use it to conduct business.

Lorelai released Jess from her grasp and leaned against the desk.

"Are you okay?"

"Why, because you just strangled me?"

"Because you didn't hear me when I called your name in the lobby or notice me when I went up to you. Because you slept in so late. Because you were so stressed last week."

"I was stressed last week because I had a paper I was totally unprepared for due. Paper's finished. No more stress."

"And today?"

"Today…I'm just recuperating, okay? You were right, I stayed up way too late all week and I needed to catch up on my sleep."

"Three in the afternoon is way past catch up on sleep time. I thought you were going to get up at ten or eleven, not a few hours before sunset."

Jess let out another sigh. "My brain feels like mush. I did so much studying last week. I needed to sleep. And now I just want to read and be left alone."

Lorelai tapped her fingers on her desk, trying to comprehend what she was hearing. Concern was her primary emotion, but there was a little bit of amusement too. "You're overworked from school and you want to decompress with reading? Jess, you are the  _weirdest_  kid."

Jess grinned.

"Okay, I left that note because I thought I might need a little extra help today. And then I got here and I realized I definitely need a little extra help today. So I know you just want to relax for the day, but could you do Mommy a favor and put the book away for an hour or two and help out? It'll probably be good for you to do something that doesn't use your brain anyway. I'll pay you your usual rate."

"A bag of skittles doesn't cut it anymore."

"I haven't paid you in skittle since you were ten."

"You tried last month when I picked up a delivery from Kim's Antiques for you."

"I haven't  _successfully_  paid you in skittles since you were ten."

"Fine. I could use the cash."

Lorelai squinted her eyes. "What do you need cash for? The only thing you buy are books, and I buy most of those for you."

"I have expenses," Jess said, not expanding on what those expenses could be. Lorelai was left to fill in the blanks on her own. Her imagination was far too vivid.

"Like what?"

"Cracked cocaine," he said deadpan.

"Really Jess?" Lorelai said, matching his sarcasm. "I raised you better than that…the powdered stuff is way classier."

Jess smirked.

Whatever he needed money for it was probably more along the lines of harmless pranks than something to actually be concerned about. Lorelai dropped the subject. She would find out soon enough. Besides, she didn't exactly disapprove of Jess's pranks. She couldn't admit it to him without losing her good mother cred, but doing things like drawing a fake dead body outline in front of Doose's Market, which he did a few weeks ago, was actually pretty funny. "Go see Michel. He's got a list of deliveries that need to be distributed to the guest."

Jess smirked and left. That boy drove her crazy sometimes but she sure did love him.

Lorelai went back into the lobby just as Jess went upstairs with his hands full with an over-sized gift basket. She went behind the front desk, where Michel was standing, on the phone.

"Well that sounds wonderful," he said. "You must come by one of these days and have tea. We will talk and you can tell me all of your stories and I'll tell you mine. I have much to share."

Lorelai poked Michel's arm. "Hey, no personal phone calls." They were just too swamped today for this kind of slacking.

Michel took the phone from his ear and placed it against his shoulder so the receiver couldn't hear him. "It's your mother," he said.

"My mom?" Lorelai asked, horrified. What was her mom doing calling her at work? She took the phone from Michel. "Mom?"

"Hello Lorelai," Emily said. Her voice was cheerful and pleasant, as if she wasn't just conspiring with Michel moments ago. "I wanted to speak with you, but before we talk can I just say you have a lovely concierge."

Lorelai grimaced. Michel was only charming when it suited him. He was up to something.

"You're not meeting Michel for tea," Lorelai scolded. She turned to Michel and mouthed  _what is wrong with you?_  He just smiled back and turned to sort through a pile of mail. That asshat knew this whole scenario was getting to her and loving it. Jerk.

"And why not?" Emily asked.

"Because I'm not going to let you gossip about me with one of my friends."

"That would imply we're friends," Michel said, not looking up from the envelope in his hand. Lorelai leaned over and flicked him in the ear. He yelped.

"Who said you'd be the topic in mind?" Emily asked.

Lorelai turned and went back into her office, closing the door behind her. No need to let Michel eavesdrop anymore. "Well, I overheard him saying you'd swap stories. What else do you two have in common."

"Michel is a very cultured man. He's from France. I travel to Europe every other year. We have lots in common."

"Whatever, Mom. Do what you want, just leave me out of it." Lorelai sat down at her desk and put her feet up on it. She could barely deal with Emily's nonsense on a regular day of the week. Today? She wanted to pull out her hair and scream. Where was that bottle of Advil? Did Rory still have it?

"Really, Lorelai, not everything is about you," Emily chastised.

"Is this phone call?"

"Now that is. I wanted to talk to you about how things were left Friday night."

Lorelai groaned. Not this again. She didn't have the time or patience for round two.

Emily continued anyway. "I contacted my maid service and they sent me a list of names they think might be acceptable."

"Acceptable for what?"

"To hire."

Lorelai sighed and leaned back in her chair as far as it would go, staring up at the ceiling. Throughout Lorelai's entire childhood Emily kept a revolving door of maids, many only lasting a few weeks at a time. "You didn't already fire the new maid, did you? How long you'd keep her? A week?"

"Who, Mira?" Emily asked.

"Actually, I think her name was Sarah."

Michel appeared at the door of the office with a clipboard. So much for keeping this phone call private. He waited in front of her desk for her signature. Lorelai sat up and looked for a pen on her desk—it was too cluttered to find anything easily—and he sighed at her, obviously judging the state of organized chaos that was her office.

"Fired her this morning," Emily said. "She never came when I called her."

"Maybe because you kept calling her Mira instead of Sarah."

Emily continued to ignore Lorelai's criticisms. "The maid is for you."

Lorelai choked, which was impressive since she wasn't eating nor drinking anything. Once she cleared her throat she said, "Mom, I don't need a maid. When I want to clean I bribe Jess…though not with skittles anymore—it's this whole thing."

"Not for your house. For the inn."

Lorelai looked around the lobby. Did Emily know how busy they were today? More workers today actually would be a Godsend, but she could only stretch her budget so far. And a maid from a service as prominent as the one her mother used would be far too costly.

"I have a full staff," Lorelai said.

A pen caught her eye. She picked it up and hastily wrote her signature.

"This would be a proper maid," Emily said. "One with training and professionalism."

Ah, there it was. At the forefront of their fight last night was Rory, the improper maid who reminded Lorelai of herself. Emily didn't approve and was trying to meddle Rory out of a job and out of Lorelai's life. Lorelai's knuckles turned white. It took all her restraint not to throw the phone across the room and scream. "I'm fine with the maids I have, thank you very much."

Michel lingered by the door, taking his time to exit the tiny office.

"Lorelai this is not how you do business," Emily scolded.

"Excuse me if I don't take advice from a housewife who hasn't held a job since before her wedding day. I run an inn. I'm in business school. I know what I'm doing. Thank you for your concern but no thank you." Lorelai hung up the phone without saying goodbye and slammed it onto her desk, knocking over Jess's school portrait.

"Well that was rude," Michel said.

Lorelai glared at him. "I said thank you."

"Oh, my mistake. Next time you rudely hangup on me please be sure to add in a sarcastic and disingenuous thank you. That will make it all better." Finally, Michel left her in peace.

Lorelai put her head on the desk. She just needed a moment, a moment to think and clear her head. The inn was driving her crazy, her mom was driving her crazy, Hell, even though she couldn't blame him for it Jess was driving her crazy too. Just one moment to recompose herself.

The phone rang. Lorelai growled and tried to answer the phone as pleasantly as she could. Despite her efforts, it was still pretty aggressive.

* * *

 

With a basket of fruit delicately balanced on one arm, Jess knocked on the door of suite 301. A young girl about his age answered. She looked familiar. Then it clicked. She was Lorelai's new maid, the one who came by a few days ago to pick up some of Lorelai's things. What was her name again? Lorelai had said it just last night, but Jess couldn't remember it now.

The girl didn't look very happy to see Jess.

"What?" she asked. Her face was pinched into a sneer.

He lifted the fruit up high. "Delivery."

The girl opened the door all the way and stepped aside to let him in. She didn't offer to help him, which was fair. He didn't help her at all when she was over the house. Jess walked the basket across the room and placed it on an end table. He could hear giggling from the bathroom, clearly where the brides to be were hanging out. The girl went back to sitting on the chest in front of one of the bed. She was reading. Jess cocked his head to the side to get a better angle.  _The Handmaid's Tale_ , it said.

"Atwood?" he asked, already knowing. It was a surprise to see her reading such literature. Maybe it was for school. Was she in school? Jess wasn't quite clear on the girl's age or really much about her, but she looked like she could be young enough to be attending Stars Hollow High. Then again  _The Handmaid's Tale_  was on the Stars Hollow High ban list. And if she was working as a maid and living in the potting shed that she was probably at least eighteen, right?

"Last I checked that's the name on the cover," she said.

Jess smiled. "When mom read it she said if she lived in that world she'd probably be shipped off to Canada, like, well, Offred's mother."

The girl looked up with a glare. "Spoilers!"

Jess nervously laughed. "Sorry. Not too far in?"

"Just started."

There was a long pause before Jess said, "You don't like me."

With a roll of her eyes, she responded, "Whatever made you draw that wild conclusion?"

Jess nodded. "I get it. I'll leave you alone." He walked to the door.

The girl put the book down and stood up. "You don't get to act like a royal-class jerk to me and then come in here and act like everything is hunky-dory."

Jess turned around, ready to be ranted at. He was used to being yelled at by women. Lorelai did it to him pretty often, not that he didn't usually deserve it. And he deserved this too. He had been pretty mean to her.

"I was a stranger," the girl continued. "Lorelai invited me over. And you were rude to me. For no reason. I'm sorry that those five minutes it took for you to show me the stuff Lorelai left for me really put you out, but sometimes that's life. I've been put out in my life recently too, you know."

Jess frowned. Her eyes were moist and on the verge of tears. He knew he acted like a jerk, but had he really upset her this much. Should he offer to get her a tissue or would that just make things worse? He opted for silence.

"Well aren't you going to say something?" she yelled. "No? Fine, go away! Leave me alone."

"I'm sorry," he finally said. The apology felt hollow. He'd been forced to apologize a lot lately and each time it felt more and more insincere. Maybe there was something wrong with him? Or maybe he was just becoming numb to letting people down so often. Either way, he felt like a sociopath.

He  _was_  sorry, though. He never meant to make this girl so distressed. How could he make her understand that without risking exposing his long-buried emotions?

The girl sneered and sat back down. She turned her head and looked out the window. "Sure you are," she mumbled.

Jess walked over to her and sat down next to her on the chest. It wasn't very large, and could barely fit the two of them. Was that inappropriate, he wondered?

She crossed her arms and looked the other way.

This girl was practically crying. He could risk a little emotional vulnerability, right?

"I am," Jess said. "I was having a bad day. I just started a new school and was swamped with homework. I had a week to catch up on about a month worth of classwork…but I shouldn't have been such a dick. Sorry." It all just sounded like weak excuses. And that's what they were.

The girl continued to pout, but just as Jess was about to stand up and leave she turned to him and said, "I had a really bad week too, you know. Life changing bad. You're in a new school? Well, I'm in a new town. I can't go back home. Not ever. At least you still have a home and your mother.

Damn. Lorelai said this girl had been through a lot but Jess hadn't given much thought as to what that could be. He tried to imagine a life without Stars Hollow or Lorelai. If he was in this girl's shoes he wouldn't last a week.

"I could have used a little kindness. But I guess the way you treated me was just balancing out the scales. Your mom's been  _so_  nice. Sookie too. I just wasn't expecting you to be so different."

Jess's throat was dry and it hurt just to swallow. How hard would it have been to just be nice to this poor girl? And he could give every excuse in the book: he was stressed from school, he was in a bad mood that day, he was in a hurry, but he knew the truth. He was hurting that day and wanted someone else to hurt just as much. That wasn't fair and that wasn't right. But that also wasn't something he could admit out loud.

"If you ever come over again I'll make some small talk, offer you a soda and not act like missing five minutes of studying is going to result in failure, okay?" It was such a pathetic offering after what he had done that he regretted the words the instant after they were out of his mouth.

Instead of getting upset the girl's lips curled upwards and tensed like she was losing against a battle to not smile. And she was losing pretty badly. "Okay, you're forgiven. I'm too nice to hold a grudge."

Jess blinked, stunned by her words. "Are you serious? That's all I needed to say? So what, you'll forgive everyone who transgresses against you?"

The girl's smile fell and a look of seriousness engulfed the girl's eyes. "Not everyone." They held each other's gaze for a long moment.

There was a scream from the bathroom. One of the brides ran out, her dress soaked. Her twin sister ran out behind her, giggling with a bottle of champagne dripping down her hand. "Dory, get us glasses!" she said.

"Rory," the girl mumbled under her breath.

Rory. That was her name. Jess made sure to commit it to memory this time. He repeated the name again and again in his head while looking at her. It was cute and charming. It fit her.

"There's a boy in here!" the wet twin said.

Jess stood up and turned to the twins. "I was just dropping off your fruit basket."

The dry twin walked over to him then clapped her hands. "This would go perfect with chocolate!"

"Yes!" her sister said. "Get us a chocolate fountain."

Rory stood up and leaned over to Jess's side. She whispered in his ear, "Run while you still can."

Jess didn't waste any time getting away, but for the rest of his shift his thoughts kept drifting back to Rory.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading! And a special thank you to badwolfchild for commenting on every chapter so far! Your feedback keeps me going! :D
> 
> I am hoping to have another update next week, but if I'm unable to I wanted to let you all know this story will be on hiatus during April while I participate in Camp NaNoWriMo. My goal is to complete the entire first draft of this story, so I can start focusing on just editing (I do so many drafts it's not even funny) and posting.


	6. F Is For Friendship

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/n: content warning in the endnotes. Oh, and this chapter is kind of depressing and angsty again, though it still has its light moments.
> 
> Reminder that I am going on hiatus for the month of April to focus on participating in Camp NaNoWriMo. I spent the last few days focusing solely on editing this chapter because I feel bad about my upcoming hiatus.
> 
> And before you read just let me warn you that Tristan comes off as a major jerk in this chapter again. And this won't be the last time. Let me repeat that this is not character bashing, I actually like Tristan, it just takes a while for this fic to show his layers. There will be more to Tristan's character than a rich snob later on.

Monday came too soon. After the first week at Chilton Jess felt like he needed a month to recuperate. Instead, he only got the weekend. At least things at home were better. Lorelai was being annoyingly attentive after his confession on Thursday night, but it was actually kind of nice. The voice that kept saying she was lying, that she didn't really love him, quieted down.

He arrived to English class ready to absorb information. Finally, he was caught up. Chilton would be a breeze for now on. Throughout the lecture, Paris, who sat in the seat directly in front of Jess, became increasingly annoying as she smugly answered all of Medina's questions, often before he even called on her. She needed to be taken down a peg.

Jess had done his studying for English during the past week. Sure he procrastinated a lot, but he also absorbed everything he read. He knew this material like the back of his hand now. In the past, Jess had always been the kid who rarely spoke in class, even when he knew his answers. Today, was different though. Today, he had a reason to speak up. Paris was his reason.

"Shakespeare redefined the sonnet in Elizabethan society," Mr. Medina said. "While they followed the basic structure of the English sonnet, which was…?"

"Fourteen lines and Iambic Pentameter," Paris said without looking up. She scribbled down notes as she spoke.

"Correct, Ms. Gellar. A typical English sonnet was be written to…?"

"An unobtainable female love interest or a Goddess, as she was often referred," Paris answered again.

"Correct, Ms. Gellar. But Shakespeare deviated from this norm and instead chose to write about…?"

Jess spoke up before Paris could, "A young man and a 'Dark Lady', written to be the opposite of a Goddess."

Paris turned around in her seat and glared at Jess.

"Correct, Mr. Gilmore!" Mr. Medina said. "Nice to see someone else joining in."

Jess smiled back at Paris and gave her a short wave until she finally turned back around. Damn, that felt good. Normally he hated speaking up in class, he hated the eyes of his classmates on him as he spoke, and while he was sure he knew the answers a part of him wondered if he was wrong and if the other students would laugh at him. But seeing the look on Paris's face when he upstaged her made it all worth it.

Class continued and Paris's reaction made Jess's confidence soar. He spent the rest of the class competing with her to answer questions first. Medina actually looked sort of proud of him as he did it, and Jess didn't even mind the look. He was sort of proud of himself too.

Finally, Medina got around to passing out last week's paper while he droned on about this week's test on Shakespeare. It would be twenty percent of this semester's grade.

Medina reached Jess's desk and placed his paper down. Jess lazily looked down at it, expecting a pretty good grade. School work had always come easily to Jess, even if it was a struggle to  _do_  the work. He had never gotten less than an 'A'. Sure, Chilton was harder, but he still expected he would do just as good here.

When he looked down staring back up at him was a big, red 'F'.

The room started to spin. What? It couldn't be. It had to be a mistake. He had never even gotten a 'B' before, how could this be an 'F'? He flipped through the pages, all covered in red ink. He was going to be sick. Everything he thought about himself was wrong.

Paris was turned around in her seat, staring down at his paper. She was back to looking smug. Louise and Madeline sat on either side of Paris.

"Hard paper," Paris said to her friends as they all stood up. Jess continued to stare at his paper. He couldn't move. His legs were jello.

"Killer," Louise responded.

"How'd you do?" Paris asked.

" 'A'."

"Me too."

Louise glanced over at Jess's paper. Finally, he gained enough composure to grab it and turn the grade away, but it was too late. Not only had Paris seen it, but so had her goons. He picked up his backpack and shoved his failure inside. Jess looked back up to see Louise giving him a sympathetic smile. Pity was even worse than gloating. Jess stood up and put his backpack on, trying to get out of the classroom as quickly as he could, but his classmates were bottlenecked at the door.

"Madeline," Paris said, "how'd you do?"

"You know I got a 'B'," Madeline said.

"A 'B' isn't bad," Paris said.

Paris and the two girls followed Jess toward the door as he tried and failed to make his escape.

Paris went on when neither of her two friends responded. "Respectable even." She raised her voice and inched closer and closer to Jess's back. "An 'F', however, that would be cause for concern."

"Maybe," Louise said. "Course, grades aren't everything."

"What are you talking about?!" Paris said. Her attention was now focused solely on Louise, giving Jess a little room to breathe. "Grades are the only thing that matter. Why go to a school like Chilton if you're going to flunk out?"

Finally, Jess reached the doorway. Of course, the hallway was just as clogged.

"There's lots of things you don't need good grades for," Louise said. "Studying never helped me find a boyfriend. The length of my skirt, however…well, I guess you wouldn't know anything about that, would you?"

Jess turned around briefly and saw Paris's face go beet red. She growled and then stormed past Jess and through the clogged hallway. The other students parted like the Red Sea as she stomped by them. No one wanted to get in the way of an angry Paris Geller.

Louise gave Jess a wink and he turned back around. What the Hell had just happened? Why had Louise defended him? Everything in his world was turning upside down.

Jess ducked into the first bathroom he saw and went straight to the sink, splashing water on his face.

The bathroom door opened and Jess's heartbeat quickened. Why couldn't people just leave him alone?

"Gilmore!" someone said cheerily. Jess looked over to see Tristan standing by the door, smiling. What did this idiot want?

Jess turned around to confront the other boy. Yelling at morons always made him feel better. He knew Tristan wanted to be his friend for some reason. That reason Jess could not figure out. Jess, on the other hand, wanted to strangle the stupid moron.

"Was that fight between Paris and Louise over you?"

"Eavesdrop much?"

"Oh, come on man. You're breaking my heart. I'm just trying to be friendly"

Jess tried to leave through the bathroom door but Tristan wouldn't move.

"You going to Duncan's party?"

Why did Tristan insist on talking to him? "I don't 'party'," Jess said.

"I don't think they're going to force you to do the hustle. Just come. Have a drink. Talk to girls. Louise will be there!" Tristan put his arm around Jess's shoulder. Jess didn't like that. Way too familiar of a gesture.

Tristan handed a flyer to Jess and then walked into a stall.

Jess looked at the flyer.

_Saturday Night. Party at Duncan's. 8 PM-?_

It was about the lamest thing he had ever seen. He crumbled it up and threw it in a trashcan then dashed out of the bathroom.

* * *

Lorelai watched like a proud mother hen as Rory adjusted to the Independence Inn. Lorelai would arrive at work each day after breakfast at Luke's to find Rory finishing up her own in the kitchen with Sookie. Then Rory would start her assignments. She was a fast and disciplined worker, just like Lorelai was. Rory would be rising up through the ranks fast. Maybe one day she would take over Lorelai's position. Or maybe Lorelai would bring her along once she and Sookie finally opened that inn of their own that they always talked about. Either way, Rory was fitting in perfectly and making an impression.

Lorelai felt a twinge of pride regarding the girl, especially considering the fact that Jess seemed to be floundering again. After finally achieving peace with Jess on Saturday he returned home on Monday in as foul a mood as ever. He refused to talk any more about what was bothering him and instead yelled at her. Lorelai wasn't sure if it had more to do with his confession from Thursday night, about how he feels unloved and unwanted, or if it was something else. Luke couldn't get anything out of him either.

Jess was scaring her. This wasn't normal teenage mood swings. Something was wrong and it started right around the time he began Chilton. Was sending him there the wrong decision?

While Lorelai considered her options about what to do with Jess she spent time with Rory. On Tuesday afternoon Rory and Lorelai sat in the kitchen eating sandwiches. Lorelai had been cutting back on her usual daily lunches at Luke's or Westons, and instead having them in the kitchen with her girls. She wanted to spend as much time with Rory as she could. Lorelai, Rory and Sookie were making quite the threesome.

Occasionally Rory would bring a journal with her and write in it. Today was one of those days. The silence was fine with Lorelai, she herself was in a bit of a mood that afternoon. She and Jess had gotten into another huge argument last night, her mother had already left three voice mails about Jess this morning, and she was pretty sure her underwear didn't dry completely in the dryer, which just felt icky.

It wasn't clear what Rory wrote in that journal, whether it was diary entries or some sort of radical manifesto, but the notebook was the only thing of Rory's that the girl seemed to have from home. Lorelai had filed that information away. Whatever reason caused Rory to run away only gave her time to grab one item.

Sookie ran back and forth between the counter where Rory and Lorelai sat and the stove. She ran the kitchen so well. She was in one spot stirring the soup and tasting it, then without a moment's notice, she'd be dashing across the kitchen, weaving through her helpers, and on the other side, wildly picking up a knife and slicing vegetables. While it was pretty obvious why there were so many bandages on her hand the greatness of the food that this madness created spoke for itself.

One of the sous chefs was stirring the soup pot. Sookie looked up. She shouted at the ceiling. "It needs more pepper!" She ran back toward the stove and pushed the chef out of the way. He stumbled into another worker. Sookie took a box of black pepper and added a teaspoon then stirred before walking away. The sous chef resumed his work.

Sookie made her way over to Rory and Lorelai.

"You want to try the soup?" she asked.

"Oh no, this is plenty," Rory held up her sandwich. There was only a small bite left. Rory had devoured the rest of the sandwich in one minute flat. Those weren't signs of a well-fed girl.

"Salvador! Get a bowl for Rory," Sookie commanded.

Normally Lorelai tried to protect people from Sookie's overfeeding, but this girl needed a more pushy touch. She was already skin and bones. Lorelai feared what would happen if she didn't eat.

Salvador placed a bowl filled to the brim with soup in front of Rory. He handed her a spoon then returned to his cutting board.

Sookie smiled. She motioned a spoon-feeding gesture.

Rory didn't argue. It was tomato soup with green garnishes that decorated the top. She dipped her spoon into the soup and took a taste.

Sookie bit her lip as she waited in anticipation for Rory's response. "So?"

"So what?" Rory asked.

"How is it?"

"Really good." Rory took another spoonful as if to prove the point.

"There's nothing wrong with it?" Sookie asked.

"It's perfect."

"If there was one thing you could come up with to fix it, what would it be."

"Sookie," Lorelai said, "she said it was good." She was used to Sookie's constant need for praise and could handle the job of propping up Sookie's self-esteem, but Rory was just a child. A very hungry child who just wanted to eat her lunch in peace. "Stop badgering her and give her some more."

"Come on, Rory, don't be shy," Sookie said. She leaned over the counter and inched her face closer to Rory. Sookie never could take directions very well. She was going to keep prying until she achieved the satisfaction she wanted from their praise. "Tell me the truth. What's wrong with it? Tell me!"

Rory sighed. "I guess, if I had to choose something, maybe a little less salt."

Lorelai's stomach dropped. Uh-oh. Rory failed the test. She was supposed to keep insisting that the soup was great, not play into Sookie's madness.

Sookie's eyes bugged out. "Less salt?" Her voice was very quiet. "Less salt." Sookie turned to her kitchen staff. She yelled. "You heard that? Less salt! Throw it all out."

"But Ms. Sookie," Salvador said. "Lunch is about to start."

"No, no, no! You heard Rory! Too much salt!" Sookie stormed over to the other side of the kitchen. She picked the pot off the stove, the flame still lit, which Salvador promptly shut off, and waddled it over to the sink.

"Sookie what are you doing?" Lorelai shouted.

"Soup's no good!" Sookie lifted the pot up above the sink to pour it down the drain. Lorelai rushed across the room and grabbed the pot. They tug-of-warred it until Lorelai got the upper-hand and slammed it down on the counter, splashing some of the messy, red contents onto the counter and floor while doing so. At least most of it was saved.

"Sookie, lunch is about to start," Lorelai repeated Salvador's words.

"The soup's no good!" Sookie screamed and flailed with her hands.

Lorelai put her hands on Sookie's shoulders. She smiled and her voice became soothing. "Mind if I try?"

Sookie waved her hands in the air and walked away. "Do what you want." She walked over to the counter beside Rory and leaned against it, moping.

Lorelai picked up a bowl and ladled the soup into it. Salvador handed her a spoon. Lorelai took a taste. Her eyes lit up. "Sookie! This is delicious."

"Bah!" Sookie said.

"No, it really is."

Sookie pushed away from the counter and stood straighter. Her forehead crinkled. "It's not too salty?"

"Just briney enough."

"But Rory said."

Lorelai shot a glance at Rory who became flustered. "Uh…" was all that came out.

"Rory didn't mean that," Lorelai said.

"Yeah," Rory said.

"Then why'd she say it?" Sookie asked.

"I don't know," Lorelai said. "Maybe she likes making you run around the kitchen like a chicken with its head chopped off."

"Hey!" Sookie and Rory said in unison.

"Rory's sorry. Now go take a break. Salvador will serve the soup."

Sookie didn't argue and left the kitchen. Lorelai walked over to Rory. The girl blushed and avoided eye contact. "Why did you tell Sookie her soup was too salty?"

"I'm really sorry," Rory said, her bottom lip trembling. She looked up and her already too bright blue eyes were moist. It was so different than the apologies Lorelai usually received from Jess. She wasn't just sorry she got caught doing something wrong, she was genuinely upset that her actions hurt Sookie. Rory's words clearly weren't an act of malice. They were an honest mistake. "She kept asking me what was wrong with it. I had to say something."

Lorelai squeezed Rory's shoulder. "She was fishing for compliments."

Rory frowned as a line appeared between her brows. "But I already told her it was great."

"She was looking for even more praise. With Sookie you have to sing her greatness from the rooftops. And that still won't be enough for her."

Rory nodded. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to upset her. I was trying to make her happy, I swear."

"She'll be fine." Lorelai's eyes darted over to the stove. "Salvador is just going to have to keep his watch over the soup for the rest of the night. This won't be the last time she tries to throw it out."

Standing by the stove Salvador nodded.

Rory looked up at Lorelai, blinking away tears. Lorelai reflexively reached out to wipe Rory's tears but Rory flinched and hid her head again.

"Shh," Lorelai said, and squeezed Rory's shoulder once more. "There's no reason to cry. It was just a mistake. No one's mad."

"I just…don't like to be touched…unexpectedly," Rory said. She wiped her tears. "It's okay if I know you're going to but…I didn't realize so I pulled away. Sorry, I wasn't trying to be rude."

"No," Lorelai said. This was something at least. Rory was opening up and revealing something deep and personal. This was one step closer to learning why Rory ran away.

Did Rory's aversion to touches have to do with her running away, or was that just the way she was wired? Jess was wired like that, he'd never been abused but he still hated being touched. It made it hard for someone as cuddly as Lorelai to show her affection. But Rory didn't just dislike being touched. She flinched easily. Her eyes were always darting around a room, noting the exits. She was terrified of strangers.

Then there was yesterday when she had accidentally bumped into Michel and spilled coffee all over his new loafers.

"What is wrong with you, you stupid girl!" Michel had screamed. "Do you know how much I spent on these shoes? I imported them directly from France! And I did not pick them up on my last trip home. Non! I haven't had a vacation in months."

Rory had fallen to her knees, crying and covering her face protectively.

"I slaved away at that desk, for no raise, and wanted to treat myself and you ruined it. What are you going to do? Are you going to pay to have them cleaned? Hmm? Stop crying and answer me!"

"Michel, walk away," Lorelai had said.

Michel had opened his mouth to argue but Lorelai had simply pointed at the door. Maybe something in the way she had looked told him this wasn't a joke, but for the first time during his entire employment at the Independence Inn he had listened to her without a fight and left.

Lorelai had knelt down next to Rory and offered the girl a place in her arms. Wrapping Rory's head against her chest, she'd held the girl close, letting Rory's tears soak her blouse. They had sat like that in the middle of the lobby for as long as it took Rory to recompose herself. Patrons had snuck peeking glances at them while they walked by, but that stopped after Lorelai had sent bone-shattering glares in their directions and they'd all scurried away. When Rory had finally settled down and gotten up to go back to work they'd put the matter to rest, never to speak of it again.

But that was yesterday. Today, Rory was sharing more about herself and her past. Today, Lorelai could use her words for comfort.

"My son's kind of the same way," Lorelai said, trying to normalize how Rory felt. "He was a really fussy baby. If you wanted to snuggle then you were smothering him and he would cry until you'd go away but if  _he_  wanted to snuggle then he was going to cry and cry until he got his way…he was kind of like a cat that way. He always wanted attention, but only on his terms. And don't tell him I said this, but I don't think he ever grew out of that."

Rory smiled slightly. "Oh, I'll be sure to not tell him. I've only met him twice, very briefly, but that doesn't sound like something he'd want people to know. He's very…stoic, I guess."

"Look, I don't know what you're dealing with, Rory, but you're going to be okay. You've got me and Sookie now…just remember the rules about her cooking."

"Always praise?"

"And then praise some more."

Rory smiled then flexed her jaw. Finally, she asked, "Lorelai…can I hug you?"

"You can always hug me," Lorelai said. "You never need to ask."

Rory wrapped her arms around Lorelai's shoulders, this time without tears, and Lorelai knew this story was going to have a happy ending. It was going to be a long journey, though.

* * *

As the week went on Jess was back into his original Chilton rut. He was back to not comprehending anything. In one ear, out the other. It wouldn't matter, anyway. He was going to fail. He was going to flunk out and get sent back to Stars Hollow High, disappointing everyone in his life. His mother would hate him, his grandparents would resume the status quo of no contact, and his peers would ostracize him. He was a failure and he knew it. He stared at the window, contemplating how shitty his life was about to become.

Suddenly a loud bang caught Jess's attention.

"Huh?" Jess flinched. Mr. Medina was hovering over him, after having dropped a heavy textbook on Jess's desk.

"Mr. Gilmore, are you still with us?" Medina asked.

The class giggled. Typical high schoolers.

"Yeah." He leaned forward in his chair and rested his chin on his hands.

"This will be on the test, Mr. Gilmore."

Jess nodded and tried to focus on the teacher. Medina continued his lecture but it only took a matter of minutes before Jess was staring out the window again. What was the point of paying attention anyway? He was just going to flunk out so why put in any effort?

Before he knew it the bell rang again. Jess packed up his things. He hadn't taken a single note.

"Mr. Gilmore," Medina said. Jess hated how Medina said his name. All the teachers at Chilton addressed the students by their last name, it was more proper, but the way Medina said Gilmore sounded so snobby, like Medina was mocking him.

Jess swung his backpack over his shoulders and approached the teacher's desk.

Medina leaned against the front of the desk, looking down at Jess while they spoke. "You okay?" Medina asked.

Jess shrugged. Everyone had been asking him that a lot lately. Was his state of mind that obvious?

"That doesn't seem like a yes."

"I'm fine," Jess said. "A little annoyed at this line of questioning, though."

Medina gave him a sympathetic smile. "I'm just concerned about you, Jess."

Medina had dropped his first name. That meant this was serious business, right? This wasn't just a teacher talking to his student, this was a teacher trying to be a friend. Well, Jess didn't need any friends, especially not one who was his teacher. This concern was insincere, anyway. Medina didn't actually care how Jess was doing, he was just pretending to care because that was part of the job. No random teacher actually gave a damn about Jess's personal struggles, especially not the asshole who threw out his fresh pack of cigarettes last week. Yeah, Jess was still holding a grudge about that.

"You didn't take any notes today," Medina said.

Ah, and now the real reason Medina was taking an interest. He didn't want Jess screwing up the curve. "Maybe I've got an eidetic memory," Jess said.

"That you've just discovered?"

"Maybe I'd forgotten about it."

"Funny. Now I'm serious, Mr. Gilmore. I know I'm your teacher but I'm also here to guide. If you're struggling with something you can tell me—not just school work either. If there's something in your life that's bothering you we can talk about it."

Jess rolled his eyes. Confiding in a teacher about your personal issues was one step away from being a teacher's pet. If Jess didn't want to talk about his problems with his own friends, or even Lorelai or Luke, why would he talk to this asshat?

"I know you failed that essay," Medina went on, "but it's only one assignment. It's worth just a fraction of your grade. There's a big test coming up, it's worth twenty percent, so if something is distracting you let me know so I can help you through it."

"Thanks," Jess said, "but I don't need a Mr. Feeny to look out for me." He went out the classroom door. Medina called after him but Jess kept walking

The crowd of students were already starting to thin as everyone filtered into their classrooms. At the end of the hallway was Tristan. Shit. The last thing Jess needed after that conversation with Medina was to deal with Tristan. He couldn't explain it but the guy seemed to have a hard-on for Jess, and no matter how often Jess tried to ignore Tristan the idiot just never seemed to take the hint and go away.

Jess was about to turn the other way when he saw another student hand Tristan an envelope. Tristan quickly tucked it into his blazer and walked away. The other student, some dopey looking kid from their English class, walked in the other direction. Okay, curiosity officially piqued. What was in the envelope? Drug money? Nude photos? A birthday card? Suddenly Jess's interest in this school was renewed.

* * *

After Sookie's tomato soup fiasco Lorelai decided it was time to get Rory out of the inn. She'd been here a week already and as far as she could tell had never left the inn's premise other than the two times she came over Lorelai's house. It was time to meet the rest of Stars Hollow.

"Rory!" Lorelai called when Rory was pushing a maid cart through the lobby. "I need help for like a half hour. Got the time?"

"I was about to go on my break," Rory said. "I could push it back if you need me to."

"Yeah, go tell Donna to take hers first. I need an extra set of hands for an errand. You don't mind?" Lorelai didn't really need Rory's help, but Rory didn't need to know that. Mia used to do the same thing with Lorelai when Lorelai first moved in. They would go out on small little errands together that were secretly about showing Lorelai the town.

Rory said she'd be right back after she put her cart away and spoke to the other maid. When she returned she had switched into a hoodie. "Where are we going?" she asked.

"Kim's Antiques," Lorelai said and ushered the girl to the door. "Cute little antique shop near the Town Square. Have you visited any of the local shops?"

Rory shook her head.

"You should. There's some great stuff. And great food. Oh, food! Sookie's a great chef, but you're really missing out on the local cuisine if you don't try Weston's or Al's Pancake World."

"I liked Luke's pancakes," Rory said. They walked down the Independents Inn's walkway and reached the sidewalk. The town square was about a five-minute walk from where they were. They would have plenty of time to chat.

"Oh sweetie, Al's doesn't make pancakes. He does international cuisine."

"But…Pancake…World."

Lorelai shrugged and refused to explain away the quirkiness of her town. It was more magical when you kept it mysterious.

They reached Main Street just as Miss Patty and Babette turned the corner. The two older, heavy-set ladies waved and power-walked over to them. As always Miss Patty was wearing a flashy and colorful wrap while Babette wore a casual sweater, which did nothing to subdue the striking look of her overdone, blonde perm.

"Is this the new maid, darling?" Miss Patty asked.

"Uh, yeah. This is Rory." Lorelai forced a smiled and glanced at Rory, who was blushing. Miss Patty and Babette always meant well, but they were such a presence and probably too much for a timid little mouse like Rory to deal with right now.

"Told ya!" Babette said.

Lorelai tried to quicken her pace and escape for the town gossips, but Miss Patty and Babette followed.

"I'm Miss Patty," Miss Patty said, "And this is Babette. How are you liking Stars Hollow?"

"Um…" Rory said, "…it's nice I guess. Everyone is just so nice and friendly—nothing like New York."

"You're from New York?" Babette asked.

Rory flinched and so did Lorelai. Rory had never said where she was from before. She was so secretive of her past. Such a secret slipping out was a good thing, though. It meant Rory was letting her guard down. She was feeling comfortable around her new neighbors. And maybe Lorelai could finally learn more about this girl. But not with Miss Patty and Babette around.

Rory stared down at her shoes and seemed to clam up again. Babette didn't seem to notice.

"Oh, the Big Apple. I'm from there, you know?" Babette said.

"I lived there for a while myself," Miss Patty said. "Danced on some off-Broadway shows. Bordered with this mean, old man and batty but sweet old lady."

Babette laughed. "Sounds like my folks."

"Well it's been nice—" Lorelai said, but was cut off by Miss Patty.

"Lorelai here is just the sweetest, right?"

Dammit, Patty and Babette wouldn't take the hint. As much as Lorelai loved them, their timing today was awful. Rory was starting to open up but Patty and Babette were going to scare her off.

Rory looked up at the two old ladies and hesitantly nodded at Miss Patty's question.

"I keep telling her that—and how she would be perfect for this great-nephew I have, but she won't bulge. Help me out a little, will ya?" Miss Patty winked.

"Miss Patty, stop!" Lorelai said, her attention now on the hypothetical setup instead of Rory. This felt like the hundredth time this conversation had come up. Why were these ladies so obsessed with her love life?

Miss Patty was terrible at taking direction—a terrible sign for a performer, by the way. They continued with their way too personal line of inquiry. "How about you, darling?" she asked Rory. "Are you single?"

Rory's face turned as bright as Sookie's tomato soup.

"That's a yes."

"You don't have a kid, do ya?" Babette asked. "Or are you pregnant?"

"Excuse me?" Lorelai asked, insulted for Rory. "You can't just ask people that, Babette."

Babette shrugged. "Why not? You had a kid when you moved here and became a maid at the inn. I thought maybe she was like you."

"Babette, that's way too personal."

"I don't have a kid!" Rory said, flustered.

"But pregnant…?"

"I'm not pregnant!" Her voice became high-pitched and her eyes began to water as they darted across the street.

Kim's Antiques was only a few blocks away, if they could quicken their pace they could get there in under a minute. Mrs. Kim wouldn't put up with this kind of nonsense in her shop. It would be their haven.

"So no kid, not pregnant and single. Sounds like the package deal," Babette said when they reached the other side of the street. She and Miss Patty continued to discuss possible setups, despite Lorelai and Rory's apprehension. There were no stopping those two once they got an idea in their head.

"I think I have the perfect second cousin thrice removed for you," said Miss Patty.

"Oh, what about Jess?" Babette asked.

Miss Patty giggled. "Could you imagine? Lorelai's son and her new prodigy."

"They'd be the hottest couple in Stars Hollow," Babette said.

And now Lorelai got to feel mortified for a third person. Would Miss Patty and Babette not stop until they played matchmakers for the entire town? "Really Babette," Lorelai asked, "you're trying to fix Jess up too? Have you met him? Does he seem like the setup type?"

"Hey ain't exactly knocking girls away with a stick, Hon," Babette said.

"It's really okay, you don't need to try to fix me up with anyone," Rory said.

"It's the quiet, loner archetype that's the problem, right?" Miss Patty asked. "He's a cute boy, Lorelai, but you need to get him to be more social."

"Hey, don't knock it till you try it," Babette said. "Morey's quiet, that's my husband Rory, but oh, when he speaks boy does it make your heart go ba-da-boom." Babette smacked her chest three times when she said "ba-da-boom".

"Please stop," Lorelai said. "This is my son, you're talking about."

"I really don't need anyone to set me up," Rory said again.

The four continued to walk in silence. They reached Kim's Antiques walkway.

"What about Doose's new bag boy?" Babette asked. "Dean, I think his name is?"

Rory sprinted toward the store. Smart girl. Lorelai said goodbye to Miss Patty and Babette who turned back and continued on their original path while Lorelai joined Rory inside.

Finally, peace at last.

"What do you want?!" Mrs. Kim appeared on the sales floor and practically screamed at Rory. She quickly crossed the room until she was inches away from Rory's face.

"Um…" Was all Rory could say.

"Well?" Mrs. Kim barked. Mrs. Kim was a middle-aged Korean woman with a harsh demeanor and a no-nonsense attitude. Lorelai knew Mrs. Kim wasn't trying to intimidate poor Rory, she had no idea about the interrogation Rory just suffered from Miss Patty and Babette and this was just kind of how Mrs. Kim was, tough but fair. Still, Lorelai's motherly instinct kicked in anyway and Lorelai swore to pull the attention away from Rory.

"Hi, Mrs. Kim!" Lorelai said, as sweetly as she could. "This is Rory, my new maid. We're here to pick up the new inn order?"

Mrs. Kim looked over at Lorelai and then stared both customers up and down before finally walking away.

"Did I do something wrong?" Rory asked in a whisper.

Before Lorelai could respond Mrs. Kim shouted "Come!" at them. They both scurried to follow her path through the maze of furniture that cover the sales floor and found Mrs. Kim at the back of the store. Since Mrs. Kim and her family lived in the antiques store the backroom also contained their kitchen and dining room. The bedrooms were upstairs where no costumers were allowed.

In the dining room sat Mrs. Kim's teenage daughter, Lane. She looked as studious as ever while she read from a textbook and scribbled into a notebook. Round glasses framed her face and her hair, cut into a bob at the chin, was decorated with tiny barrettes. Lorelai liked Lane well enough. She had been in Jess's class since the first grade, but because of Mrs. Kim's aversion to boys, Jess, nor any other boy at school, had never really gotten to know her. Despite her outward appearance and her upbringing, though, Lorelai knew there was a rebel hidden deep inside this girl. Last year Jess started selling her burned copies of his favorite CDs, and then later giving them to her for free once he realized how much living under the thumb of someone like Mrs. Kim must have been like. Lorelai didn't see anything wrong with her son helping Lane find her inner rocker—a life without Bon Jovi isn't a life worth living.

"Lane!" Mrs. Kim shouted.

Lane stood up and at attention at once.

"Pack up Lorelai's order." Mrs. Kim handed the girl an antique cuckoo clock.

"Yes Mama." Lane looked down at the floor until her mother left the room.

Mrs. Kim returned to the sales floor, leaving Lane alone with Lorelai and Rory. Lane immediately slouched and smiled. She was such a different person when her mother wasn't around. No longer intimidated into obedience Lane showed her true self, relaxed and friendly. "Hi Lorelai," Lane said. She put the cuckoo clock down on the table and offered her hand to Rory. "I'm Lane."

"Rory," Rory said, staring at her feet once more. She was shaking like a leaf. So much for all the progress they had made.

"She's a new maid at the inn," Lorelai explained.

Lane nodded and got to work on wrapping. She pulled out a long sheet of protective paper and wrapped the cuckoo clock inside.

"Are you okay, Honey?" Lorelai asked Rory.

Rory blinked and nodded but it wasn't very convincing.

Lane stared at Rory before going back to wrapping. "Was it Mama? I know she can be scary but…well, there isn't really a but." Lane frowned.

"I think we could have dealt with Mrs. Kim if not for the interrogation we both just suffered from Babette and Miss Patty," Lorelai said.

Lane's frown got bigger. "They still trying to find you a husband?"

"Oh, they're looking for one for Rory too, now. Jess was on the short list, by the way." Lorelai put her purse on the dining table and started rummaging through it.

"Can't imagine Jess ever going on a setup. How is he, by the way? We miss him at Stars Hollow High.

"No you don't," Lorelai said. She finally found what she was looking for and pulled it out. "But I'm sure you miss the new Smashing Pumpkins CD." She waved a gospel music CD case in the air.

"Oh, you're the best!" Lane cheered, just loud enough for Mrs. Kim to  _not_  hear.

Rory grabbed the CD from Lorelai before Lane could. "I think you have the wrong CD," she said. "This is called  _Melodies of Gods_. The Smashing Pumpkins' new album is called the  _Machines of God_ , not melodies. I…I think this is religious music too, not alt. rock."

Lorelai and Lane shared a look and giggled. If their deception worked so well on Rory then it would work on Mrs. Kim too. Lane took the CD and opened it, showing a burned CD-ROM. "Lorelai and Jess burn me music because Mama won't let me have the 'Devil's music' in the house. The case is a decoy."

"Oh. That's…really smart," Rory said while she blushed.

Lane put the CD in her backpack then went back to wrapping Lorelai's clock. "So Rory, if you're a maid does that mean you're out of high school?"

Rory looked like a deer caught in headlights. She looked between Lorelai and Lane before finally saying, "Uh…uh…yeah…I'm eighteen…graduated last summer."

Lorelai frowned. That was the opposite of convincing. Lorelai and Rory had intentionally avoided the subject of Rory's age but now it was clear she was under eighteen. Mia had been so good at feigning ignorance regarding Lorelai's age during Lorelai's first few months in Stars Hollow. Could Lorelai still do the same for Rory even though the ruse was so obvious now?

"It's too bad you're not a few years younger," Lane said. She didn't seem to notice Rory's lie. "Nothing interesting ever happens at Stars Hollow High."

"I'm interesting?" Rory asked.

"You're new. That's interesting."

Rory smiled and Lorelai's heart fluttered. She put her worries about Rory's age aside for now. A friendship was blossoming before her eyes. This would be good for both girls. If Rory and Lane became friends it would mean Rory would get out of the inn more, and it would give Lane a connection to the world outside her mother's watchful thumb. Plus, since Rory was a girl then Mrs. Kim might even approve of their friendship, as long as Rory really wasn't pregnant, that is.

That was a lot of ifs, though, and if Rory really was younger than Lorelai had first hoped than she wasn't sure she could keep protecting Rory inside the inn. Her real family could track her down one day and drag her back to God knows what. The trouble she was running from could find her again. Once more, Lorelai had to ask herself if she was making the right decision by harboring Rory. It was right for Lorelai when Mia did it, but Rory was a different child with a different set of problems. Lorelai didn't even know what those problems were yet.

"We could still hang out, you know, if you wanted to," Lane said. She handed the wrapped clock to Rory.

Rory was beaming. "I would love that."

It was the start of what should be a beautiful friendship. Hopefully, Rory's past wouldn't catch up to her to put an end to it.

* * *

As Jess's classes ticked by his interest in school continued to wane. He had given up on lunchtime studying. What was the point? He was never going to pass, so he might as well get some reading in. Black Flag blared through his Walkman while he read  _Do Androids Dream Of Electric Sheep?_

Concentrating on his pleasure reading was difficult too, though. Usually when Jess was stressed he could immerse himself in a book and forget about his issues. Today, that wasn't so. He put the book aside and observed his classmates. Paris was seated with Madeline and Louise, the later who were forgoing their lunches and swapping a bottle of nail polish. Apparently, Paris and Louise had made up after their confusing fight over Jess. Tristan was seated with a couple of cute girls who were fawning all over him. And then there was that guy from English who have given Trisan that envelope. They were in a few more classes together and Jess was pretty sure his name was Brad. They had never spoken before.

Brad got up and left the lunch room. Jess didn't know why he followed. The creepiness of his actions only increased when Jess continued to follow him into the restroom.

Brad was at the urinal but Jess stood by the sink, not willing to steep so low as to pretend he had to pee. He waited until Brad washed his hands before he said anything.

"You okay?" Brad asked before Jess could work up the courage to speak.

Jess crossed his arms and leaned against the sink. "I saw you hand Tristan an envelope today. Money?"

Brad's eyes went wide and his face became pale. "I—I—are you going to report me?"

Jess shook his head. "Just curious…drugs?"

Brad dried his hands on some paper towels, which he then used to wipe his forehead. "Why, you looking to buy?"

"Like I said, just curious. I didn't realize Chilton had a seedy underbelly…makes the place kind of interesting."

"Well sorry to disappoint but Tristan isn't dealing drugs."

Why did Jess's heart sink at that news? It wasn't like he was looking to score, he just wanted to discover the dark side of Chilton…right?

Or maybe there was something darker inside of Jess. Maybe the pain he kept buried for so long was itching to come out and each day it got harder and harder to keep it buried. Maybe when he thought Tristan and Brad were up to no good there was a brief moment of relief. Finally, he could have something to help keep that pain numbed for just a little longer.

No, he just wanted to watch the shit storm that Tristan was caught up in. Yeah, that was the story he was going with.

"Well, then what was the money for?" Jess asked.

"Who even said it was money? You didn't see what was in the envelope, right?" Brad's eyes darted toward the door.

Jess stepped in front of Brad's view of the exit. "You wouldn't be acting so cagey if it was just a congratulations card. Tell me what's going on."

Brad bit his lip and looked at his shoes. Whatever this was it was weighing heavily on Brad's conscience. Still, Jess wasn't sure if he could get Brad to crack. He wasn't exactly charming the guy right now.

Just then the bathroom door swung open. Tristan entered and looked back and forth between Jess and Brad. "What's going on?" he asked. The door swung closed behind him.

"The jig is up!" Brad said. "Jess knows. Or at least he knows enough."

Tristan took a couple of very definitive steps towards Jess and stopped just a few inches away from his face. "Oh yeah? What's that?"

Jess knew Tristan was trying to intimidate him, but Paris was the only person in the entire school who could pull that look off while wearing a sweater vest.

"I know Brad's paying you for something. Just don't know what, yet. I've ruled out drugs."

Tristan laughed and backed away. He swung his arm around Brad, who looked uncomfortable with the friendly gesture. "You actually thought for a second that sweet, innocent Brad could be involved with drugs? He was giving me test answers for the Shakespeare test."

"Tristan!" Brad said.

"It's cool," Tristan said. "Who's the scholarship student gonna tell? Hey, I would have cut you in on the deal too, I know you're not making the grades either, but Brad's probably out of your price range."

Rage boiled inside of Jess. He was wrong about Tristan. Tristan didn't think they were the same. Tristan thought he was better than Jess and everyone else in this damn school. They were all just some sort of playthings for Tristan to mock. Jess took a step toward Tristan, ready to take a swing, but Brad stood in front of him, snapping Jess out of it.

"You're not going to tell?" Brad asked.

Jess blinked. Deep breath. In and out. He promised Lorelai he wouldn't get into fights at Chilton. He couldn't risk getting kicked out of this school. "Do you really think I'm a tattletale?" he finally asked.

Normal coloring returned to Brad.

Tristan smiled and reached over to put his hand on Jess's shoulder. "See, told you Gilmore would make the right decision."

Jess stared down at the hand. Tristan's nails were perfectly manicured. "Get your hand off of me before I break your fingers."

Tristan laughed but at least he obeyed. "You're a riot Gilmore, you know that?" He exited the bathroom.

Poor Brad was still shaking. The system wasn't fair from the start. Not only did these rich preps have every advantage since childhood but they were also buying test answers. How could Jess compete at this level? He didn't stand a chance if he played by the rules.

"What is your price range?" Jess asked.

Brad's eyes bugged out again. "No, I can't get involved with another person. Please. This has gone too far as it is. Tristan, Duncan and Bowman, now you? I was only trying to make a little extra spending money and it just got out of control. Now I can't get out of it. Tristan owns me. He knows if anyone finds out I'll get expelled."

"Isn't that mutually assured destruction?" Jess asked. "He'd be expelled too?"

"He doesn't care. His parents would just buy him into the next school. My parents wouldn't be able to do that. They had to scrimp to send me here."

Jess felt a pit in his stomach. Brad was like him, just another average kid from an average family among these rich assholes. Brad probably had a bright future ahead of him as long as people like Tristan didn't destroy it. Or people like Jess.

"Look, I'm not going to tell anyone but…but I'm new. I'm behind everyone else. It's not a level playing field…you know what that's like, right? To be at a disadvantage." Jess couldn't believe he was playing the class card like that. "All these rich snobs have had every life opportunity afford to them. I'm just trying not to lose my chance. Just one test, Brad. Help me get through Medina's test and I'll never bring this up again, I swear. I just can't afford another F."

"And what happens when the next test comes around?"

Jess wasn't sure. If people like Tristan always had the answers then it wouldn't matter if Jess studied; he'd always fall behind the curve.

"The mutually assured destruction doesn't apply to me, Brad. I have no skin in this game…yet. You want leverage on me? You want a way to guarantee my future silence? Then give me the test answers." It was blackmail and Jess didn't like the taste of the words in his mouth, but he had no other choice. This was the only way he could stop himself from flunking out of Chilton.

"I gave the answers to Tristan already," Brad said. "I can't get another copy. It's too risky. You'll have to work something out with him."

"You didn't keep a copy for yourself?"

"I'm not a cheat!" Brad said. "I never looked at the answers either."

Jess shook his head. This kid was just too pathetic. He sighed and left the bathroom. Tristan had already gone back to the lunch room. How was he ever going to convince Tristan to let him in on the deal? And could his conscience take this much deceit? Was he really this morally bankrupt? Jess was almost afraid of the answers to those questions.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Content warning: PTSD.
> 
> The scene in question contains a moment when Rory has a PTSD reaction. The reasons why is not cleared, but it happens after she is being yelled at, and she cries and protects her face. It also contained references to other PTSD-like reactions that Lorelai has noticed Rory having.
> 
> For those who chose not to read the scene due to that moment here is a summary of the scene, which is the second scene of the chapter. Rory and Lorelai are having lunch in the kitchen while Sookie prepares lunch. Rory accidentally insults Sookie's soup, causing Sookie to freak out over her food. After Lorelai calms her down she speaks to Rory about making sure to always praise Sookie's cooking. Rory is upset that she upset Sookie and when Lorelai tries to give her a comforting touch Rory flinches. Rory tells Lorelai she doesn't like to be touched unexpectedly—though she is fine with affectionate touches when she sees them coming. Lorelai then recalls an incident from the previous day when Michel screamed at Rory over accidentally spilling coffee on his shoes and Rory fell to the floor, crying and covering her face. Lorelai comforted Rory at the time. In the present Lorelai comforts Rory again and the scene ends with a hug.


	7. The Moral Event Horizon

Jess wouldn't be intimidated by some rich kids trying to buy their way ahead. He couldn't. He shouldn't. But the truth was he was. It didn't matter how smart he was or how hard he tried, people like Tristan always came out on top. Pulling yourself up by your bootstraps was bullshit. The system was rigged. The only way to win was to beat them at their own game.

It was the end of the day when Jess worked up his nerve to confront Tristan over the answers. Outwitting the moron to convince him to hand them over wouldn't be hard so why was he so nervous? Jess's sweaty palms nearly slipped off the handle of the door as Jess followed Tristan inside the bathroom after last period.

Another Jess-Tristan bathroom confrontation; these were starting to become a bit cliche. But for once Jess was the one confronting Tristan. That slight misbalance of power made him feel in control. He could do this. He could manipulate Tristan just as Tristan did to so many of their classmates, like Brad and Paris.

The door closed behind him and Jess locked it. The last thing this conversation needed was witnesses.

Tristan stopped in front of a stall and turned on his heel. He looked amused. "What's this?"

"Shut up," Jess said. People in control don't answer questions. They don't ask questions either. They made demands. "I asked Brad about the test answers," Jess continued on. "He's said he gave you the only copy. Time for you to hand them over."

Tristan smirked. "Really? Got to say, I didn't take you for the cheating type. Desperate times, huh? That F really get to you?"

Tristan certainly wasn't acting like Jess had hoped. He probably still thought he was in control, that he had all the power. No matter, Jess would show him otherwise with a bone-chilling glare.

"I'm not giving you the test answers, Gilmore. Wouldn't want you to get mixed up in this kind of trouble, right?"

"I'm not really giving you an option." Jess held eye contact for a full five seconds before continuing. "I've got dirt on you. Only way to keep me quiet about it is to let me in on your cheating ring."

"Really? You would do that?" There was a look of disgust on Tristan's face. What right did Tristan have to judge him when Tristan was the one cheating in the first place?

"Answers, Tristan."

Tristan crossed his arms. "No."

"I'm not messing around. I've got dirt on you."

Tristan took deliberate steps toward Jess. Any resemblance of power and control was gone from Jess's grasp. It was clear who really held all the cards in this conversation. The two inches Tristan had on Jess that made him feel so much smaller certainly didn't help either. "So go tell Headmaster Charleston. Get me kicked out of school. You think I care? Go ahead. Do it! But if you take me down I'll take Brad down with me. You really want that on your conscience." Tristan didn't blink once.

"You're a psycho," Jess said, though he shouldn't have been surprised. Hadn't Brad warned him that Tristan had nothing to fear over being discovered? Jess made a beeline to the door with new determination to refocus and beat Tristan with good old fashion studying. He just couldn't let Tristan win.

"Answers will cost you $500," Tristan said before Jess reached the door.

Jess turned back around. "What?"

"You heard me. You can't blackmail me, but if you want in on this deal then you're going to have to pay for it."

Jess thought it over for a moment. All of that new determination disintegrated once a chance to cheat was back on the table. Maybe this never really was about evening the odds. Maybe this had always been about taking the easy way out. Jess wasn't going to give too much thought to his motivations though. Tristan's motivations, on the other hand, were curious.

"What do you even need money for?" Jess asked.

"I don't," Tristan said with a shrug and a laugh. He walked toward the door. "Let me know your decision by tomorrow or I'm putting the answers in the shredder."

* * *

When Jess got off the bus from school he went straight to Luke's. Though they've grown distant in the past year or so Luke was still the only person he trusted to help him out of a bind. If anyone could help him decide what to do about Tristan's offer it was Luke. Jess went right up to the diner counter and sat down, waiting for Luke to serve him.

"Just you today?"

Jess nodded.

"What'll you have?"

"I'm not really hungry. I just…could I talk to you…alone?"

Luke looked him up and down then finally nodded. He told Jess he could wait upstairs and to give him a couple of minutes to make sure the other customers were set.

Jess went upstairs and into the apartment. It was unlocked like usual. Luke had no reason to mistrust anyone in Stars Hollow.

It had been a while since Jess had been in this apartment. He used to come up here to work on building model airplanes with Luke a few years back, but Jess had long since lost interest in that. He had lost interest in many of the things that used to bond him and Luke. Most of the models had been taken home by Jess, and had since been lost somewhere in the hoarders pit that was his and Lorelai's garage, but there looked like there was one sitting on top of Luke's fridge. Had Luke continued to make the models without him? That stung a little. He thought that was their thing. How could Luke do it without him?

Jess reached above the fridge and picked up the model. It was unfinished. A memory flashed in his head. Jess was about fourteen. He was sitting at the kitchen table with Luke, nagging him about how boring the models were. Luke told him if he didn't want to work on them anymore then he could just leave. And Jess did just that. He did so without even a thought about how hurt Luke looked. He didn't want to play with stupid model planes anymore. That was kid stuff.

The door to the apartment swung open and Jess dropped the plane. It smashed at his feet.

"Shit!" He bent down to pick it up but it was too late. Jess looked over to see Luke, looking sadder than he ever had before.

"Luke, I'm sorry!"

"It's fine." Luke picked up the rest of the pieces and took the ones in Jess's hands then shoved them into the junk drawer next to the fridge.

Why had Luke kept that model plane all these years? Why was it in the exact same condition as when Jess left that day? Had he been waiting all these years for Jess to return and finish it.

"What did you want to talk about?" Luke asked.

Right, Jess had come up here to get advice about school, not wreck Luke's things. The outcome of this meeting thus far only proved how much of a menace Jess was and how he should have just kept away from Luke.

"You know, it's not important," he said. "I'm gonna take off. Lot's of homework." Jess walked toward the door.

"You okay?" Luke asked. "School okay?"

Jess turned on his heel. No, it wasn't. It was terrible. He was struggling for the first time in his life and the social aspect was even worse. Everyone there hated him and thought he was some loser. At least at Stars Hollow High he had a couple of friends who could help him through the day. And there he was the opposite of the class dunce.

"It's just harder than I expected," Jess admitted. "I just need to adjust. I'm sure Harvard will be just as hard. I'll figure it out. Don't worry."

"Well I'm here if you decide you do need to talk," Luke said.

Every instinct told him to take Luke up on that advice. To tell him about the F on his paper and how he was thinking about cheating and how completely overwhelmed he felt. He wanted Luke's guidance and help. Instead, Jess just nodded and went out the door. He would figure this out on his own. It would've have been unfair to burden Luke more.

* * *

Jess made a little money from allowance and sometimes Lorelai paid him for extra work at the inn, but it wasn't much, and he had already blown everything he made last week when he went book shopping. Jess checked his wallet but all he could find was a five. Jess debated checking the couch for cushion change but he knew that wouldn't be enough either. Is this how Lorelai felt when she asked Richard and Emily for help with Chilton? No, this was worse than that. At least when Lorelai asked her parents for help it was to do the right thing. She was making a sacrifice in order to give Jess something she thought was best for him. But what Jess was doing was wrong and he knew it.

So why was he continuing down this path? He could turn back any second, change his mind and forget about giving Tristan the money. Until the money exchanged hands he had done nothing wrong. So why didn't he stop? Why was he still searching every crevice of his room for a little extra cash?

Another deviant idea came to him, something that would only further dig his immoral grave. There was one place in his house that had a whole lot of money, but taking it would be on par with the cheating itself. Perhaps even worse.

Lorelai had a secret stash of a few hundred dollars in her room. She called it her rainy day shoe fund, but they both knew it was for an emergency. Lorelai had trusted Jess with the location. Despite his mild delinquency he had given her no reason to mistrust him. Could he really break that trust and steal from her today?

Yes, yes he could. He had to. Otherwise, he would just disappoint her by flunking out. He could either be a thief or a failure, and honestly he'd rather be the former. Hopefully, though, Lorelai would never have to discover that he was either.

Jess snuck upstairs, tiptoeing quietly along the carpet, even though no one was home. He opened the door to his mother's bedroom. It squeaked. He continued across her floor and reached her dresser. Lorelai was a terrible hider. He pulled out the first drawer, where she kept her miscellaneous items such as jewelry, hair clips, and that torture device thingy that women used on their eyelashes. There was also an envelope of money, the emergency fund. Jess opened it up and counted. With the money he found on his own he still needed $460. Jess rounded that up to $480—he couldn't spend all his money, after all, he still needed cash to buy things like cigarettes and Red Bull. He took the money, stuffing it into his jean's pocket. There wasn't a lot of money left, but as long as he replaced it in the next few weeks Lorelai would probably never discover what he had done.

After closing the drawer Jess made a mad dash down the stairs. His heart was beating so fast that it felt like it was about to burst out of his chest. He had just stolen from his mother. He couldn't believe it. He reached the living room as the front door jiggled, as if a key was being put in.

Jess hopped over to the couch and spread himself across it. He grabbed a random magazine off the coffee table. Lorelai entered the room.

"You would not believe the day I had," she said in a huff. She looked over at her son. "Cosmo?"

Jess looked down at the magazine he had picked up. It was one of his mother's. Just his luck.

Jess smirked. "Yeah, well, I really wanted to know the six tips to satisfying my man."

Lorelai looked down at him and glared. "You're up to something...but I'm too hungry to try to figure it out…Luke's?"

Jess pulled his backpack off the floor and started to look through it. "I'm busy," he said.

"Too busy to eat?"

"I've got homework."

"Which is code for 'I'm up to something'."

Sweat dripped down his forehead. Did Lorelai notice? Was she on to him? "It's code for 'I've got homework'."

"Fine, don't tell me." Lorelai walked away and to the kitchen. As her rummaging echoed down the hallway Jess could finally feel his heartbeat begin to slow. When she returned Lorelai had a box of Pop-Tarts in her hands. She tossed a package to Jess, not bothering to ask if he wanted one. "Do we really only have Pop-Tarts?" Lorelai tore open the package anyway and bit into the top one. She continued to speak with food in her mouth, "but seriously, if you're hiding a girl in the closet you should really let her out."

"I'm not hiding a girl in the closet."

"Boy? Either way, let them out! It's stuffy in there."

"I'm not hiding anyone in the closet, Mom, jeez!"

"Fine…but you are up to something, right?"

Jess looked back down at the magazine and didn't answer.

"It's still Cosmo," Lorelai pointed out.

Jess tossed the magazine to the floor and went back to searching through his bag. He pulled out a new book, a new Gaiman novel that he had just bought and hadn't had time to start yet, but Jess opened it up to the middle of the book anyway. People were more likely to leave you alone when you're in the middle of a book than the beginning. They assumed you're more involved in what you're doing. He wasn't concentrating on any words anyway.

"Okay, fine, don't tell me. Last thing I want is another fight with you. Just don't overwork yourself. I'll go pick up some takeout, okay? Luke's or Al's?"

"Not hungry."

Lorelai said down on the couch next to his feet. She reached over to feel his forehead but he pushed her hand away. "Are you feeling okay?" she asked.

"No. I'm feeling annoyed. Leave me alone." He got up and stormed into his room, slamming the door behind him. Surprisingly, Lorelai didn't follow him in. Good. He couldn't take the guilt of looking at her and continuing to lie. All he could do to cover it was was redirect his as anger toward Lorelai, which he knew she didn't deserve. Still, he'd rather hurt her that way than with the truth.

The next morning he bought the test answers of Tristan. And then the guilt only got worse.

* * *

Despite the brief reprieve from Jess's moodiness that weekend, as the week went on Lorelai realized his new attitude was here to stay. It was like living with a hormonal teenage ticking time bomb. Worse superhero name ever, by the way. His grumpiness could only be compared with dinner-rush-Luke's (better superhero name), that is when he wasn't avoiding Lorelai entirely. The Gilmore house had become an emotional health hazard and Lorelai had even started to avoid it, in favor of spending more time with Rory. Perhaps she was using the girl a little to fill the whole Jess was currently leaving in her heart by pushing her away.

Honestly, Lorelai was worried about her son. This just wasn't the Jess she knew and loved. Chilton was supposed to fix his misbehavior, but he was way worse than he ever was while attending Stars Hollow High. Sending him back to his old school had to be seriously considered. But if she did, what would Richard and Emily say? And would that really fix Jess's underlying issues?

Rory was the one thing in her life right now that was going well. As the week went on Rory opened up more and more to her. Now Lorelai knew the girl was from New York, her favorite color was yellow and she dreamed of traveling across the globe. The two talked for hours about backpacking across Europe, a dream Lorelai once had when she was Rory's age, but had to give up once she had Jess. Rory swore that nothing was going to get in her way of traveling.

Thursday evening, though, everything took a turn for the worse. What happened was something that would change her relationships forever. And it all started with some wet laundry. If only she had skipped her chores.

As Lorelai went onto the back porch to start another load she found everything in the dry soaking wet. "No, no, no!" she yelled, peeling through the dripping clothes. The machine hadn't been drying well for days, but when she tried to redo the load this time it wouldn't even start. "Dammit!" The last thing she needed right now was to make a costly call to the repairman. She could swing the money if she had to, but it was going to take a big chuck out of her takeout budget.

Lorelai went inside and picked the cordless off the kitchen table. There was one option she could call before she had to empty her wallet.

"Luke's," Luke answered. "Pick up or delivery?"

"Delivery," Lorelai said. "I'll take a lumberjack-looking handyman and a side order of Bert."

"Lorelai?"

"Yes?"

"Who the Hell is Bert?"

"That's what I call your toolbox, duh."

There was a loud sigh on the other line and then finally Luke asked. "What the Hell are you talking about?"

"My dryer broke. It's been making this gurgul-gurgul sound for days and not drying too well and now my clothes are soaked and it won't start at all."

"So call a repairman."

"Repairmen cost money. Please, Luke! I'll tell all the other ladies how sexy you are!"

"The other ladies don't need your input. Just put your clothes on a clothesline. Dryers are bad for the environment anyway."

"And risk smelling like a pine cone?"

There was another loud sigh. "Fine. I'll be over after the dinner rush."

"Thank you!" Lorelai cheered. "Oh, and could you bring over some pie!" she hung up before he could argue. Lorelai knocked on Jess's door and told him Luke was coming over with pie.

An hour later Luke was there, sans pie. Apparently, the night could get worse. After an argument about the lack of dessert Lorelai finally brought Luke out to the back porch and shined a flashlight for him while he looked it over. She couldn't hold it still though, which ended up causing another argument. Finally, Luke stood up and announced he couldn't fix it.

Lorelai pouted.

"Don't give me that look. I'm not magic. Call a real repairman."

"Will he bring me pie?"

Luke packed his tools back into Bert.

"Repairmen cost money," Lorelai said. "I need to start saving up to get Jeff and Melinda Bezos off my back."

Luke gave her a blank look.

"My parents…did I tell you about the loan?"

Luke shook his head and put Bert on the kitchen table as went back inside.

"I couldn't afford Chilton," she admitted. "Way out of my price range…so I asked for a loan. I've never taken anything from them, and the last thing I wanted was to be under their thumb again but…well it was for Jess. Anyway, the loan came with strings. We have to attend weekly Friday Night Dinners. We've been to two so far and they're terrible. Every time I go we just get into fights about how I got pregnant at sixteen and am the world's biggest disappointment."

"If they can't see how wonderful you turned out than they don't deserve to have someone like you as a daughter."

Lorelai cracked a smile. "Thanks."

"Okay, enough with the sincerity. Call a repairman."

Lorelai sighed. "Fine." She picked the phone up and handed it to Luke. "You make the call." She hurried out of the room while Luke yelled at her that he wasn't her servant, but she knew he was going to do it anyway, and probably get her a discount too. Luke was friends with everyone. Maybe he wasn't friendly, but when you feed the whole town they tend to like you.

Lorelai went upstairs and into her bedroom. The dresser caught her eye. That was where she kept her emergency fund. "And to think I was this close to affording some Jimmy Choos," she said to herself. She opened the dresser and pulled out the envelope. It felt light. She opened it. There was less than a hundred bucks inside.

Lorelai scratched her forehead. This made no sense. How could her money be gone? She hadn't used any of it since the last appliance emergency, not even when there was a sale at Bloomingdale's last month. Her first thought went to Jess. She didn't like that it did but he was the only other occupant of the house. The only other person who had real access to the money and knew where it was. But she couldn't believe her son would stoop to that level. He couldn't be so heartless.

Lorelai took a deep breath. She felt like the room was spinning. No, there was no way her Jess could do such a thing. There had to have been a break in. Lorelai looked around the room. Nothing else was missing. A break in that only stole the emergency fund? It was too absurd even for her to think.

She would have to ask him. And she would believe him, whatever he said. And even if he had taken it maybe he had a good reason and just forgot to tell her. There was no need to make accusations before she heard his side.

She heard a door downstairs open. Lorelai's whole body went tense and she briefly thought the imaginary robbers had returned to the scene of the crime before she realized it was probably just Jess or Luke moving around downstairs. She took another deep breath before going to meet them.

He was in the kitchen talking to Luke. Lorelai walked in on what seemed to be the end of a conversation. From context they seemed to be talking about her.

"It's like with drugs," Jess said. "Just say no."

"Have you ever tried saying no to your mother?"

"Hey now," Lorelai said and pointed her finger at the men. "Don't be talking about me without my presence. I want to hear all compliments addressed personally."

Jess rolled his eyes and walked back into his room. As always he closed the door a little too hard for Lorelai's liking. After a few seconds the radio blared the Sex Pistols.

"So what's the verdict?" Lorelai asked.

"Between 8 and 4 tomorrow," Luke said.

Lorelai made a face. "Don't think I heard you quite right."

"You know how these handymen work. They give you the runaround and screw you over backward."

"I don't hear you dialing back." Lorelai's voice had a very sing-song medley tune about it.

Luke grumbled something to himself and hit the redial button.

Lorelai walked over to her son's room and knocked. She didn't wait for him to tell her she could enter. He never did anyway.

"Hey, so can we talk?" she asked.

Jess was sitting on his bed with a notebook on his lap and textbook by his side. His blazer was and tie was tossed carelessly on the floor. Another intense study session it seemed.

"It's not like I can stop you," he said as he shut off his radio.

Lorelai picked up his blazer and tie and walked it over to the closet. She hung them up before sitting down next to him on his bed.

"So how's things going?" she asked awkwardly. How was she supposed to ask her son if he was stealing? She had never done this before. Would he be pissed? Lorelai knew she would have been if someone was accusing her of doing such things.

"Studying."

"Right." Lorelai nodded her head.

Jess scribbled out something on his notebook and groaned.

"Anything I can do to help?"

"You can get out."

Lorelai forced a smile. "In just a minute." She took a deep breath. "We need to talk about something."

Jess stopped writing and looked up. His gaze focused intently on her. "So now we come to the real reason you're beating around the bush."

"I'm that see-through, huh?"

Jess didn't respond.

"So you know my emergency fund? Some money out of it's gone missing. Now I'm not accusing you of anything. And if I was I would assume you'd have a very good reason for taking it. But I have to ask…" The words got stuck in her throat. She took a deep breath again while Jess continued to stare at her. Why did he have to make it so hard? It was so obvious what she was about to ask. "Did you take the money?"

Jess's eyes turned to slits. "No." One word. A simple answer.

Lorelai swallowed. He was pissed. As he should be. She was an awful mother. What kind of mother accused their child of theft? She stood up.

"Well thank you for being honest," she said. She walked to the door and stopped at it. She looked back at her son. He was looking at the notebook again but his concentration seemed to be gone. His pen was at a standstill. "I want to let you know I wasn't accusing you of anything. I just needed to ask."

"Get out!" He yelled at her. He picked up his pillow and threw it at the door.

Lorelai quickly ducked out of the room, feeling like she was going to cry. She absolutely deserved his wrath.

Luke was waiting by the counter. His eyes were wide. He obviously heard Jess's screaming. "Everything okay?" he asked.

"Yeah, just a rough day."

"You want me to talk to him?"

She shook her head. "Did you get me a better appointment?"

Luke frowned.

Just her luck. Nothing would go right for her today.

Luke took a couple steps toward Lorelai, reaching his hand out toward her shoulder, before freezing in place. "I should go," he said. He left.

The loneliness and isolation that she was left in was unbearable.

* * *

" 'Did you take the money?' Lorelai had asked.

He should have just come clean. He hadn't actually used the answers yet. He should've told Lorelai what he had done. Maybe she could have left an anonymous tip to the school about the cheating ring, got the test postponed and rewritten. Maybe that would even put an end to the ring too. Then Jess would have had an actual fair chance to study and compete against his classmates.

But what if he still failed again? No, he couldn't take that chance. So instead he lied and lashed out at Lorelai.

He was still regretting meeting with Tristan to buy the answers. The previous day he had waited outside the school for Tristan, chain-smoking cigarettes to try to starve off his nerves. Mr. Medina had walked past him, but seeing as Jess was 100 feet away from the school gates this time all Medina could do was sigh, give a brief lecture and walk away and onto campus. Jess had smirked until he remembered why he was waiting there. He was stealing answers for Medina's own test. He didn't exactly deserve to feel prideful right now.

When Jess saw Tristan pull into the student parking lot he tossed his latest cigarette butt to the ground and followed the car. He reached Tristan just as he was getting his backpack out of the backseat. Jess leaned against the side of the car and slipped an envelope into Tristan's hand.

Tristan raised an eyebrow. "What's this?"

"A birthday card," Jess said.

Tristan opened it and carefully looked inside at the green stack of cash without showing off the contents to anyone else in the area. Jess had delivered the 500 smackarons just as promised. Tristan put the envelope away in his bag, not even bothering to count the money. Then he handed a folder to Jess. Jess flashed it open just quick enough to see the first page. Sophomore Literature Shakespeare Test. Tristan had delivered the goods. Jess would be able to pass this test.

But now on Thursday evening Jess sat on his bed terrified to open the folder. Doing so really meant he was giving up and admitting defeat against the likes of Tristan. He wished he could just pretend to get sick and get a weekend delay for the test, but that would never work at a school like Chilton. There were no makeup tests there.

Finally, once Luke had left the house and Lorelai went back to her room, wrongly filled with guilt about her accusation against Jess, he opened the folder.

* * *

Friday morning Lorelai sat in her office, sipping her coffee. She had lost track of how many she'd had today. She still had a headache, though, and nothing she did seemed to make it go away.

After last night's accusation Jess became an absolute terror. He switched between giving her the silent treatment and screaming at her, and Lorelai couldn't bring herself to get mad at him because he had every right to feel that way. What kind of mother accuses her child of something like that? In the morning Babette came by and asked her if everything was alright with Jess. She couldn't come up with an excuse for why there was a screaming match in her house all of last night. They were about to become the topic of today's gossip.

What made today even worse was that she was about to have the same conversation about the missing money again, only this time with the sweetest person she knew. If Jess hadn't stolen the money, which she never really believed he had, then there was only one other logical explanation. An explanation she was only able to confront when she was positive there could be no one else who could have done the deed. The only other person who had been in the house, the only stranger, was Rory.

Rory seemed like a sweetheart, but it was also clear she had issues. She was a runaway. And as much as Lorelai wanted to see herself in the girl there was no denying there was probably a darker side to her that Lorelai just kept overlooking.

There was a knock on the door and Rory entered. "Michel said you wanted to see me?" she said.

Lorelai put her coffee cup down. She waved at the seat in front of her desk and Rory sat. There was a long moment of silence. Lorelai tapped her fingers on her desk. How did she start this? This was the Jess conversation all over again.

The silenced dragged on too long. Rory picked at her nails, obviously too scared to speak up.

Lorelai had to be the adult. After all, she called this meeting. She picked up the coffee and took another sip. Liquid courage, well her kind of liquid courage at least.

"So how are things going?"

Rory looked up at with her big blue eyes. They looked so innocent. How could Lorelai ever think someone so precious could ever do anything wrong? Rory blinked. "Good," Rory said.

It was a one-word answer like Jess usually gave, but this wasn't avoidance. The simple fact was that the question didn't require a long answer. Lorelai needed to stop the small talk and delaying the inevitable.

"We need to talk about something."

Rory stared at her and waited for Lorelai to continue.

"I have this emergency fund. And some money from it's gone missing."

Rory's eyebrows furrowed. "And...and you're asking me...are you asking me if I took it?"

"You're the only other person who's been in the house...besides Luke, but I was with him the whole time he was over. With you, well there was a little while you were alone. Plus you came over when it was just you and Jess and I don't know if he left you alone in my room, which is where the stash is, which, I should probably change now." Lorelai was rambling. She always did that when she was nervous.

"I didn't steal from you."

Lorelai felt a pit in her stomach. She didn't believe Rory. Something in her gut told her there was something terribly wrong with this situation. And that something had to be Rory.

"I don't think I can trust you anymore, Rory. And seeing how you're my employee, that's an issue."

Rory looked at the wall, no longer looking at Lorelai. She wiped her cheek. Was she crying?"

"I don't want to fire you," Lorelai said.

Rory looked back at her. Her eyes were moist. She had definitely started crying. "Then don't. Believe me when I say it wasn't me."

"I can't."

A few more tears trickled down her face. "I-" her voice came out with a croak. She closed her mouth and swallowed before speaking again. "I thought we were friends."

"I thought I was helping you," Lorelai said. "I still want to. Tell me what happened before Stars Hollow. Why did you come here? "

Lorelai was afraid she didn't have the stamina to take care of this girl. All of a sudden she had so much more admiration for Mia than ever before. How did Mia ever deal with her and Jess? She was a miracle and a saint, that was for sure. Lorelai now knew she wasn't like Mia.

When Rory refused to respond Lorelai said, "Is there any family I can contact to take you in. Maybe a family friend?"

"There's…no. There's no one." Rory's voice cracked again.

"I need to do something. Something has to change."

Rory stood up. "I'll leave."

"And go where, Rory? I want to help you but I don't know how anymore."

"You can't help me." Rory's voice was raised. "You said you would but then you treat me like a criminal the instant something goes wrong. It wasn't me. I don't know why you'd ever think it was me."

"Rory."

"Shut up!" Rory screamed. It surprised Lorelai. It seemed like it surprised Rory too.

"I've been nothing but kind to you," Rory said. "I've asked for nothing from you. I've taken nothing except things you offered. I don't deserve this treatment. I deserve a little trust." She ran out the door, slamming it behind her. Lorelai flinched.

This went all wrong. Lorelai wanted to help this girl, not send her back into the cold. She ran out after Rory but when Lorelai reached the lobby it was empty except for Michel behind the desk.

"Did you see where Rory went?" Lorelai asked.

Without taking his eyes off the magazine he was reading Michel pointed at the front door.

Odd, Lorelai thought. She would have thought Rory would have gone to the podding shed. That was her home after all and Rory never really explored the town much unless it was for a specific errand for Lorelai.

Lorelai stared at the door. The thought came to her. Was Rory going to come back? Or had she run away once again?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/n: So my 1-month hiatus turned into a 4-month hiatus. Sorry! But I actually did really well during April Camp NaNoWriMo. I wrote 30k of new words for this story, and 60k for other stories (which includes some more Gilmore Girls stuff and the start of Buffy fic), totally 90k of new words in April (the most words I've ever written in a month). Now I just need to edit all that stuff. I take way longer to edit than write, though.
> 
> The break was really good for me, though, and needed. I tried to get this chapter out before my hiatus, but it had so many issues that are hopefully all fixed now. I've also just had so much going on in my life. I'm doing July Camp NaNoWriMo now, but with the goal of editing 15 hours this month, so as long as I keep at it there will definitely be more chapters coming soon.
> 
> Please give me a review if you liked this chapter/story, or have anything you want to say to me. :D


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